Kilgrave's Good Little Girl
by LumiOlivier
Summary: Who better to bring in a murderous psychopath than a murderous psychopath? (Reader)
1. Chapter 1

It had been an entire week since I had moved into this glass penthouse overlooking Hell's Kitchen. I missed Manhattan. I wanted to go back to the tower. Instead, I had to pretend I was under the control of someone else. I hope you know what you're doing, Loki.

"Jessica," a voice called out, "Come here, darling."

I got up from my chair in the kitchen and sat next to him in the living room, "You called me Jessica again, sir."

"I did, didn't I?" he cringed, "I'm sorry. I really don't mean to."

"Was she the last one?" I asked, taking a huge leap, "Before me?"

"Slap yourself."

I whipped my hand across my own face. I could hear Loki screaming in the back of my head, beating himself up for even putting me in this situation. The stinging on my face began to set in, "I'm sorry…"

"No," he caved, "I am. You should know better than to ask about my past. There are three people you know I don't like to talk about. She is one of them."

"I really am sorry, though," I cuddled into him, trying to make up for my transgression.

"Tell me you love me."

"I do love you," I admitted.

"Am I the only one?"

"Of course."

"Don't lie to me."

"I'm not," I nuzzled in closer, "I love you, sir. And only you."

"That's my good, little girl," he brushed the hair out of my eyes, "You're so beautiful. Did you know that?"

"No," I said, really turning up the theatrics, "I've never seen myself as beautiful."

"Well," he drawled, "You should. Now, come along. We have work to do."

"What shall I do, sir?" I asked, looking up at this beautiful sociopath. In a way, I saw a lot of my one, true master in him.

"I want you to hire a private investigator," he grinned darkly, "Create some whiny bullshit sob story. This particular P.I. is so desperate to be the hero. I want you to tell her you're looking for your boyfriend Kevin. He's gone missing and you want her to find him. Lead her back here, but don't look too obvious."

"Yes, sir," I gave him a kiss on his cheek and got up from the couch. I knew who he was going to have me hire.

The frosted glass said Private Investigation on it, just like he said. A man stood in the hallway, looking like a recovering junkie. I could see it all over his face. And he was very skeptical of me. Everything was in place, just like he said. I knocked on her door.

"Who is it?"

"I'm looking for Jessica Jones," I called out, "Please. I need help."

The door cracked open, "How can I help you?"

"Please," my voice broke, "My boyfriend went missing. He's all I have. Please. Help me."

"Who referred you to me?" she asked, sharing in the former junkie's skepticism, "Was it a tall, well dressed British man?"

"No," I shook my head. This was _his_ Jessica…

"Who?"

I knew he was watching somehow. As discreetly as humanly possible, I pulled out my SHIELD badge, "I don't think you need to know who referred me."

"Come in," she opened the door to me, "I hope it's ok if I ask you some questions first."

"Go ahead," I sat down on her futon. Definitely could stand an interior decorator, but I could get on board with the whole minimalist vibes going on.

Jessica jumped up on her desk and poured herself a drink, "You want one?"

"No, thank you," I shot her down, "I tend not to drink before three in the afternoon."

"Me either," she drank, "Now, have you ever met a man calling himself Kilgrave?"

"No," I lied, taking a piece of paper from a legal pad laying on the coffee table.

 _Yes._

I slid the paper toward her, "Is he the one who referred you to me?"

"I don't know who this Kilgrave is," I kept up the performance as she passed the note back to me.

 _Is he controlling you right now?_

 _He likes to think he is._

Jessica looked me over in a state of confusion, "How?"

I slipped her the paper again, _I'm protected by someone much more powerful than Kilgrave._

"Who…?"

 _He's listening, Jessica. You're asking too many questions._

 _Does he have eyes on you?_

 _No._

 _Who's protecting you?_

"My boyfriend," I stirred up some fake tears, "Kevin…"

"Kevin," I could see her heart stop. She knew who Kevin is. She knew what my being here was.

"Yes," I nodded, taking the paper back from her, _I'm working for SHIELD. We'll be taking Kilgrave as our prisoner very shortly. I've been with him for the past week._

"You poor, poor girl," Jessica pitied me, taking the paper, _How are you immune to Kilgrave's power? How can SHIELD protect you from his virus?_

"Thank you," I wiped my eyes, picking up the pen, _That's classified. Minimum level seven clearance._

"Where did you last see him?" Jessica asked, _What level are you?_

"He was home," I told, _Level eight. Practically Avenger level._

"Does he have any favorite hangouts?" _Are you an Avenger?_

"A couple restaurants. The pub down the street from our penthouse." _No. I just know them all. I don't have any powers or Stark's money._

"I'll start looking," Jessica took my hand, "Don't worry. If there's anyone in this city that can find your boyfriend, it's me."

 _Bring that son of a bitch down._

I threw my arms around her, "Thank you, Jessica Jones. Thank you for everything."

 _That was the plan._

"Hey," she stopped me on the way out, "If you need anything, call me, ok?"

"I will."

I left Jessica's apartment and walked down to the café on the corner where Kilgrave was holed up, waiting for me. He sat in the back away from general population to keep from drawing attention to himself. I sat next to him.

"There you are, darling," Kilgrave put his phone down, "How is Ms. Jones?"

"Fine, I guess."

"Did she take the bait?" he wondered.

"Hook, line, and sinker," I reported, "Did I do good, sir?"

"Yes, my dear," Kilgrave traced his finger along my jaw, "You did very good. What kind of tale did you spin for her?"

"How Kevin's the love of my life," I told, "How he's all that I have. He's my everything. That sort of thing."

"Perfect," he praised, "Any sort of theatrics?"

"I can cry on cue," I bragged, "It came in handy."

"You, my dear," Kilgrave cradled my face in his hands, "are incredible. Where did you send her?"

"A couple of restaurants and the bar down the street from our place," I sat in his lap, "Everything's coming together so nicely."

"Shall we go get a drink?"

"Yes, please."

I could use a drink anyway. I wonder how Kilgrave would react to Asgardian mead. Thor said it wasn't meant for mortal men. I bet he'd be off his ass for a while. The mere notion made me giggle a bit.

"Did I miss something?" he wondered, looking at me like I was on drugs.

"It's nothing," I brushed it off, "Just a flashback to when I was in college."

"You were in college?"

"A long time ago."

"What did you major in?" Kilgrave asked, drinking a gin and tonic.

"Literature."

"Recite me some poetry, darling. I'm sure you know something good."

"Alright," I started on my favorite poem, "Do not stand at my grave and weep. I am not there, I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift, uplifting rush. Of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry. I am not there. I did not die."

"That was beautiful," Kilgrave brought me closer to him, "What was that?"

"Mary Elizabeth Frye," I smiled, "It's a personal favorite."

"A little melancholy, if you ask me," he shrugged, "But a beautiful sadness. Why do you like that one so much?"

"It offers a strange comfort," I explained, "It reminds me of reincarnation. How we're all a part of something so much bigger than ourselves."

"I can see that," Kilgrave pulled me onto my feet, "You look tired, darling. Let's go home."

"Ok," I took his hand as he led me out. I was actually quite tired. I could use a good, solid twelve hours of sleep. Sticking around with Kilgrave was exhausting. I didn't understand why he wanted me sleeping in a separate bed. He told me he loved me and told me to tell him I loved him, too. Why wouldn't he want me to hold at night? Not that I'm complaining. It gave me time to touch base.

"Hello, my sweet," a familiar voice boomed on the other end as soon as I was one hundred percent sure that Kilgrave was out for the night, "How are things?"

"He's tried compelling me," I reported, "Of course, it didn't work. Thank you."

"You're welcome," he spoke softly, "I miss you."

"I miss you, too," I smiled, "I'll come home soon. I really hate this whole being bait thing."

"Soon enough," Loki assured, "Call me if you need anything."

"I will."

"I love you."

"Love you, too, baby."

Click.

I got back in bed and went to sleep. All I needed was Loki's voice to pull me under. I remembered him reading me "Do Not Stand At My Grave and Weep" one night when I wasn't feeling too hot. I missed him...

Soon, my love...Soon.


	2. Chapter 2

I felt his thumb brushing against my cheek and his fingers in my hair while I slept. And so soft and tender. Granted, I don't consider myself Kilgrave's number one fan, but he did remind me a lot of my dear Loki.

Slowly, I opened my eyes only to find Kilgrave's face aglow, "Good morning, darling. Did you sleep well?"

"I did," I rubbed my eyes, "You?"

"Couldn't have slept better," he kissed my forehead and pulled me closer, "Lay with me for a while."

"My pleasure," I cuddled into his chest. I couldn't get used to cuddling with Kilgrave. He was too hot.

"Are you alright?" Kilgrave put his hand to my forehead, "You're drenched in sweat. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were running a fever."

"You put off a lot of body heat, sir," I pointed out, "My last boyfriend was practically a walking ice cube."

"Not used to warmth, are you?" Kilgrave held me against his chest, "Get used to it. You're not going anywhere. Not without me by your side."

Wow. I knew I was supposed to hate this guy, but I was really started to get Stockholm Syndrome for him. All he wanted was to be loved. I knew someone who was just like that. And I fell in love with him. My heart was still his, though. I couldn't turn my back on Loki if I wanted to.

"What about when I go to meet up with Jessica?" I wondered.

"Then, I shall keep my distance," he assured, "But not too far. I wouldn't want you to get away from me."

"Why would I want to get away from you, sir?" I turned the charm up. I could tell he was starting to fall from me. It was almost a little too obvious.

"Some people think me a bad man," Kilgrave admitted, "But some people make me that way."

"I don't think you're a bad man," I smiled a little, "I think you were forced into a bad situation and you're just making the best of it."

"What makes you say that?" he looked at me, distrusting.

"I'm really good at reading people…" Even better at reading their files.

"Are you?" he grinned, "Tell me. What was your first impression of Jessica?"

"Stubborn," I chuckled, "But fragile. Like she could kick my ass, but it wouldn't take much to tear her apart."

"Very good…" Kilgrave praised, "But you shouldn't speak of her like that. Jessica is a remarkable woman. Not remarkable enough to fight someone like me out of her head, but still. Are you meeting up with her today?"

"I can."

"I want you to," he ordered, "I want you to become best friends with her."

"She doesn't strike me as the type that keeps best friends around," I cringed.

"It won't be an easy task," he empathized, brushing the hair out of my face, "You can do it, though. I know you can."

"How do you know?"

"Because I told you to," Kilgrave gave me a kiss and pulled me out of bed, "You do have her phone number, yes?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "She gave it to me yesterday."

"I want you to set up a meeting with her," he demanded.

Without a second thought, I grabbed my phone off the nightstand and did exactly as I was told. I shot Jessica a text, asking her to meet me at the coffee shop down the street from where Kilgrave was keeping me. I looked around for my new best friend and found her in a secluded corner. I guess one could take the girl away from the Kilgrave, but it's hard to take the Kilgrave out of the girl.

"Hey," she stood up, quick like a bunny, "Is everything ok?"

"It's just Kevin," I acted, taking a napkin out of the holder and a pen from my purse, "I had a hard time sleeping without him."

 _Everything's fine. I need you to do me a favor, though._

"I can only imagine," she empathized, "This must be a very hard time for you."

 _What do you need?_

"It is," I sighed, "Have you found anything?"

 _I need you to report to SHIELD for me._

"No real leads yet," she looked down at the paper in pure disgust. _No way in hell. I've been approached by SHIELD before. They've threatened me with a full time job. We have history._

"Maybe you could check with our building manager," I lured her into Kilgrave's trap. _I need you to get a message to a particular freelance agent._

"What would the building manager know?" _Who?_

"Kevin knows the building manager. They're practically friends." _His name is Loki. If you drop my name around him, you'll instantly gain his trust._

"Kevin has friends?" _Why would namedropping make him trust me so quickly?_

"Of course he does. He's such a wonderful man once you meet him. I miss him so much…" _He trusts my judgment._

Jessica gave me a look. _Let me guess. Boyfriend? The real one? Not Kilgrave?_

I couldn't hold back a smile if I wanted to. _Yeah. And in case you didn't pick that up, he'll be waiting for you when you get to our apartment, so you may want to take Loki with you._

"I'm looking forward to meeting your Kevin," she cringed, "I'm sure he's a sweetheart."

"You know," I put the pen back in my purse, "I feel like that if you and I were to have met under normal, regular circumstances, we would've been best friends."

"Trust me," Jessica assured, "You don't want to be best friends with me. My best friend barely wants to be around me."

"Come on, Jessica," I whined, "Don't be so hard on yourself."

"I should probably be going," she got up, "Text me the address of your building and I'll be around there later."

"And that favor?"

"On my way now," Jessica grumbled.

"Thank you, Jessica," I beamed, "Give him a kiss for me."

"No."

"Fair enough," I nodded, "He wouldn't have accepted it from you anyway."

"Look," she whispered, "The fact that I'm going to SHIELD HQ in the first place is a stretch. If I didn't want Kilgrave's head on a platter, I wouldn't be going in at all."

"I really do appreciate it, though," I assured, "Call me later."

"I will."

Jessica and I went our separate ways and I went back to Kilgrave's place. I had nothing better to do today. I had a feeling, though, that he'd be pissed that I didn't come back with Jessica on my hip. Although, I do feel like she and I became a little closer.

"How was errand running, my dear?" Kilgrave called out from the couch.

"I have a new best friend, sir," I sat next to him and curled into his ribs the way I knew he liked, "Jessica and I are definitely closer."

"And how's the search for Kevin going?"

"She was sensing a dead end," I reported, "But I told her that my dear, sweet Kevin was good friends with the doorman in our building. She'll be here either later today or tomorrow."

"That's my girl," he praised, "You're doing very well, darling."

"Are you proud of me, sir?"

"Of course I am," Kilgrave held me against his chest, "I couldn't be prouder. Dinner?"

"Yes, please."

I was rather hungry. I felt like I hadn't eaten all day. Kilgrave always took me to this little Thai place, but every time, he ordered Italian. And it was always dark. Outside, inside. Did no one know how to turn a damn light on? Would it kill them? Did they not pay their light bill or…?

"Are you alright?" he asked, "You're distant."

"Fine," I snapped back, "I'm ok. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be distant."

"You should eat something," he worried, "I need you to keep your strength up. You're going to help me take down Jessica Jones. I'll need all the help I can get. And besides, you two are friends now, right?"

"Of course, sir," I nodded, "Best friends."

"That's my girl," Kilgrave traced his finger down my jaw line, "How shall I reward you?"

I could see it in his eyes. I was starting to lose him. I had to lay it on as thick as I could, "Merely being with you is reward enough for me. I love you."

And I had him back. The stars in Kilgrave's eyes sparkled again, "And I love you, darling…"

Little did he know, I wasn't talking to him. Oh, no…I was talking to the gentleman with the piercing green eyes and the jet black hair and the smug, little smirk on his face, blowing me kisses in the corner.

"Excuse me, sir," I stood up, "I need to use the bathroom. Is that alright with you?"

"Sure," he allowed, "Go."

"Thank you," I bowed to him and left for the bathrooms. I pulled myself together. I needed to suppress any feelings of love I had right now. Kilgrave didn't need to know what the real thing looked like. Or, even worse, find out those feelings weren't for him.

"Excuse me," a striking, dark haired woman walked in. She looked like she could kill a man with her high heels and walk away from the scene of the crime with bloody footprints, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," I shook her off, almost hypnotized by her beauty, "I should be getting back to my boyfriend now."

"He's not your boyfriend," she assumed, "Your heart belongs to another, doesn't it?"

"Does the name Kilgrave mean anything to you?" I screened her.

"Who?"

"The man I was with," I explained, "Have you ever seen him before?"

"Not before tonight," the woman grabbed my face, pushing her lips as hard as she could against mine. Almost immediately, I jumped back, "What's wrong?"

"I've never met you before," I freaked, "And here you are, kissing me in the ladies' room?"

"Are you really that blind, darling?" she chuckled, sealing the door, "Together for two years and you still can't see through my magic?"

The beautiful woman in front of me turned back into the gorgeous demigod I knew and loved. I threw myself back into his kiss, "I missed you so much…"

"As I you, my love," Loki cradled me in his arms, "Are you alright? He hasn't hurt you, has he?"

"No," I assured, "Kilgrave's been the perfect gentleman to me. Have you talked to Jessica yet?"

"Who?" Loki gave me a look, thinking it over, "Oh! You mean the woman that came into SHIELD headquarters today! Yes. We've met. She doesn't like me."

"Not many people do," I giggled, "Lot of people hold grudges for what you did in New York."

"I've grown since then!" Loki whined, "Isn't humanity all about forgiveness and second chances?"

"Not all of them," I smiled up at him, "But sometimes, you find the rare few that can forgive and forget what you've done."

"Like you?"

"Like me," I nodded, "Now, as much as I'd love for you to take me back to the tower, I have work to do."

"Please be careful," Loki held me tight against his chest, "I love you."

"I love you, too," I could feel the blood rush to my face and Loki's lips on the top of my head. I didn't want to go. The last thing I wanted was to let go of him. The thought of going back to the likes of Kilgrave made my stomach turn. I just wanted my Loki back. Our room in Avenger Tower. Cuddling on our bed while he reads me Shakespeare. But no. I had to go earn the trust of a raging sociopath like Kilgrave…

 **A/N: Hi, guys! Sorry I didn't update last week. I had other things going on. First of all, happy new year! I hope this year is better than the last. I really and truly do. Anyway! Next order of business! This ENTIRE story, like every other story I've posted on this website, is just the toxic waste of my imagination. The only review (So far. For some reason, the website's not letting me see any of my new reviews. Anyone else having this problem?) says that this would be amazing if it wasn't with an OC. But here's my reason for that. Notice that said OC doesn't have a name? That's because this is PURELY READER FIC. The reader gets the experience of being "controlled" by Kilgrave, of being in a relationship with Loki, of being a SHIELD agent. YOU are the MC. YOU are the OC. If that's so wrong, then that's just too bad. See you crazy kids next chapter. xx**

 **PS: If you could leave any and all reviews in my inbox, that'd be great. For some ungodly reason, I can't get any reviews in their usual spot. Hey, FictionPress! If you're reading this? Think you could get on that? Thank you!**


	3. Chapter 3

Last night was a hard pill to swallow. I didn't want Loki to let me go. I definitely didn't want to go back to Kilgrave. His good looks and his charm could only keep me around for so long. I couldn't believe he wanted me to sleep with him in his own bed either.

"Good morning, darling," Kilgrave held me against his chest, "Are you alright?"

"Fine," I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, "Why?"

"Because you were talking in your sleep," he told, "You kept saying don't go."

Damn. He's onto me, "I don't understand why I would've said that."

Lies. I know exactly why I'd say something like that. Because while I was laying in bed with you, I was dreaming of my true beloved and I in the throes of passion. And when the two of us were done, he tried leaving and I didn't want him to go. Much like when we were in the bathroom together last night.

"Do you think I'd ever leave you?" Kilgrave couldn't even look at me anymore.

"Of course not," I assured, "You wouldn't leave me, would you?"

"No," Kilgrave was attempting to comfort me, "No. I won't leave you. Tell me you love me."

"I love you, sir."

"And I love you," he kissed my forehead, "Don't forget that. Now, I want you to smile for me."

I looked up at Kilgrave with my big, sparkly eyes and gave him the biggest smile I could muster up. Apparently, it was infectious, "What should we do today?"

"Today's the day," he beamed, "We're bringing Jessica down today. In fact, she should be here any time now. Why don't you go put something nice on and meet me on the balcony?"

"Yes, sir," I crawled out of Kilgrave's bed and started walking toward the bathroom.

"Hold on," he stopped me, "Are you going into the shower?"

"Yes."

"I want to watch," Kilgrave followed me, "And you're going to let me, aren't you? And with that beautiful smile of yours on your face."

As disgusted as I was with the son of a bitch, I kept the fake smile plastered on my face and obliged. After this, I may have to sneak in another shower. The water couldn't get hot enough. I could feel it burning my skin and I could guarantee that I was going to come out a bright shade of red, but that didn't matter. I slipped into the short, purple dress that Kilgrave had pulled out for me and joined him on the balcony.

Kilgrave practically force fed me. Normally, he'd compel someone to cook for us, but today was different. He actually made breakfast for the two of us. Put his blood, sweat, and tears into it and everything. Must have been a special occasion. I may not have to like the man, but damn, he made some killer pancakes.

"Call your best friend," Kilgrave demanded, taking our dishes, "Tell her to meet you here."

"Yes, sir," I nodded, following him back inside. I pulled my charger out of my phone and scrolled for Jessica's number.

"Hey," she answered, "Are you alright?"

"Hi, Jessica," I kept the smile on my face, "Are you busy today?"

"Can he hear us?" she asked.

"No."

"Are you alright?" she reiterated.

"Have you found Kevin yet?" I worried, putting on a show for Kilgrave.

"Not yet," Jessica pacified, "I'll be coming around later today. I have some things to take care of first. I talked to your real boyfriend. You sure know how to pick 'em."

"Please," I choked out, "I miss him. Bring him back to me."

I wasn't sure how much of that was genuine, but it left me with an unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach, "Don't worry. I promise I'll get him back for you."

"He'll be waiting," I warned.

"I'll be ready," she assured, "I'm bringing Loki with me for protection."

"Thank you," I shot a look over at Kilgrave, playing with his phone, "Thank you, Jessica."

"See you soon."

Click.

I sat at the island and slowed my heart. I couldn't wait. I was going to see my Loki again. I was finally going to be able to go home. Back to the tower. Back to normalcy. Back to breaking up Tony and Steve when they get into their lovers' quarrel that they always deny, but we all know. Might as well kiss and get it over with. Morning yoga on the roof with Bruce. Clint hiding in the rafters with a Nerf gun on his hip, being as careful as he can to not shoot Natasha because he knew better. Hell, I even missed the occasional sitting up at night with Bucky when he has a hard time sleeping. But Loki? I missed him most of all…

"So?" Kilgrave ruined my longing of home, "Is she coming? Maybe making a little progress on finding your Kevin?"

"She said she'll be here to talk to the doorman later today," I reported, "Imagine how jealous she'll be of you once she sees you with someone like me."

"That's the idea," he smirked, oozing with pride in me, "I love when you catch on."

"So," I felt my skin crawl, "What do we do now?"

"You're staying here," Kilgrave demanded, "I have some business to take care of. I'll be back before Jessica gets here."

"Ok," I spun around on my barstool, "I'll be waiting."

"That's my good little girl," he gave me a kiss, "Tell me you love me."

"I love you, sir," I nuzzled my face in his chest, closing my eyes, pretending he was someone else…My someone else.

"One day," Kilgrave smiled a little, hope sparkling in his eyes, "you'll be able to tell me that without me telling you to."

"But I do love you," I assured, lying through my teeth, "There is no one I love more than you."

And just like that, I had him again. I could see it all over his face. Kilgrave was hopelessly in love with me. Yet, I could still see his obvious obsession for Jessica. He wanted to make her suffer. And he wanted to use me, her new best friend, to do it. He could pretend to hate her all he wanted, but there was more than love. He wanted to own her…

As soon as the sun went down on this day, I sat and anxiously waited for Jessica and Loki to show up. I felt like a little kid on Christmas Eve. Santa was about to come down the chimney. I could hardly contain myself. Kilgrave was even starting to catch on.

"What's wrong with you?" he glanced over the couch at me, "You're in oddly high spirits."

"It's nothing," I brushed him off, "I just can't wait to see Jessica crumble, sir."

"Oh," Kilgrave shrugged, "Come here, darling. I want you in my arms."

"Of course," I jumped down from my barstool and snuggled into him. It'll probably be the last time I ever get to do it. Granted, I missed Loki, but Kilgrave wasn't a half bad substitute. If I didn't already know how much of a prick he was, I'd feel kind of bad for what we were doing. But…well…quite frankly…Kilgrave's an asshole. Not from personal experience (aside from him telling me to slap myself), but I knew enough.

The buzzer went off and we knew she was here. Along with my phone with a text from Jessica. Kilgrave got off the couch with a dirty grin on his face, "Are you ready, my love?"

"I'm very ready," I mirrored him with my own plan up my sleeve.

"Go get her."

"Yes, sir," I softly kissed his cheek and gave him a show on my way out. I grabbed my phone off the counter and shot her a text.

 _Is he with you?_

Beep!

 _Yes. Is he with you?_

 _No._

I got into the elevator, practically shaking in my heels. I had been waiting for this moment for weeks now. I was so sick of playing pretend with him.

Beep! 

_Are we going up to the penthouse?_

 _Yes. On my way now._

As soon as the message sent, the elevator doors opened to the lobby. I exchanged pleasantries with the doorman, who was also, unfortunately, under Kilgrave's spell and keeping an eye on me. Along with the elevator attendant. As much as I wanted to throw myself into Loki's arms right then and there, I couldn't.

It was torturous. So close, yet so far away. I made eye contact with the demigod I loved and my heart shattered to pieces. Those piercing green eyes penetrating my soul. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from crying…and tasted blood.

"Hey!" Jessica threw her arms around me, her best friend, "How've you been?"

"I've been better," I kept catching Loki smiling in my peripherals, "Thanks for coming, Jessica."

"What else are friends for?" she offered me the flask in her pocket.

"Excuse me," the elevator attendant interrupted, "Who's he?"

"He's shadowing me," Jessica explained as Loki kept his mouth shut and leaned against the back wall of the elevator. I followed suit, taking his hand behind his back, "He's of no concern to you. And don't worry. He's about as ordinary as they come."

"Excuse me?" Loki's pride got in the way. Surprise, surprise. I squeezed his hand to settle him down. Quickly, he understood the error of his ways, "Yes. Ordinary."

"Alright," the attendant let it go, "Penthouse?"

"Yes," I nodded, "Ms. Jones and I have some things to discuss about Kevin's disappearance."

"Yes, ma'am," he pushed the PH button, taking us up to the top. I knew Kilgrave would be waiting on the balcony. It became our usual meeting spot.

"Hey, Jessica," I whispered to her, "Do you have the stuff?"

"Yep," she nodded, "Wouldn't have come here empty-handed. That's just stupid."

The elevator emptied into Kilgrave's penthouse and the three of us started walking through the kitchen into the living room. I couldn't wait for my "Kevin" to see the truth. Unfortunately, for the time being, I had to let go of my one and only true master. The only one I would willingly kneel for. And that wasn't him.

"Hold on," I stopped them, "I'll be right back."

"Yeah," Jessica let me go, "Take your time."

I stepped out onto the balcony and closed the door behind me, "Hi, honey. I'm home."

"Is she here?" Kilgrave ran his finger around the rim of his martini.

"Yes, sir."

"Fantastic," he grinned, "Shall we go destroy Jessica Jones?"

"With pleasure."

"Smile for me, darling," he demanded, "You're so much more beautiful when you smile."

I put that big, fake smile that Kilgrave had come to know and love on my face, "I love you, sir."

With those four little words, Kilgrave's face lit up like a damn Christmas tree. I had him. I had my claws so deep in him, "I love you, too."

And on that note, the two of us stepped back inside where Loki and Jessica were sitting at the island, discussing a plan of attack in hushed whispers. The look on Loki's face killed me. He didn't like me being under someone else's thumb. He looked so sickened by the very idea. Hell, I even missed being under Loki's thumb.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Jessica snarled.

"Me?" Kilgrave chuckled, "Really, Jessica? You're honestly surprised? Wow."

"I found Kevin," I played along, "Didn't I, baby?"

"Yes, you did, darling," he praised, kissing me deeply, "I'm very proud of you. Now, I could have her kill you with a snap of my fingers, Jessica, but your friend intrigues me. Who are you?"

"You don't need to know about him," Jessica intervened.

"Let the man speak," he snapped, "Now, again, who are you, mate?"

"I am not your mate," Loki growled, "I am-"

"None of his business," Jessica nudged him.

"Do you want me to kill you?" Kilgrave pouted, "By your own hand, by his hand, or by hers?"

"Not by your own?" she taunted.

"Too messy."

"You don't have the balls to do it?"

"Kill her," Kilgrave pushed me toward her, "Kill your new best friend."

I didn't move. And Kilgrave looked awfully confused. I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from smiling. I could almost taste blood.

"What the hell…? Why aren't you doing anything? I told you to kill her!"

I stood my ground, "No."

 **A/N: I'm really sorry about not updating this as much as what I should. I made a goal to update it every week, but I'm failing miserably. Find it in your hearts to forgive me and I'll stop apologizing so much. But as for the story, the last part kind of gave me chills…and butterflies in my belly. Because I've planted the seed for next week's story. That's the best part about writing cliffhangers. It's torturous for you, but fiendish delight for me. See you next chapter. xx**


	4. Chapter 4

"No?" Kilgrave freaked, "What do you mean, no? I control you! Kill them both! Now!"

"Actually," I grinned, "No. You don't. You never have."

"What?" he looked me over, "But that's impossible. You're so ordinary. There's nothing special about you. You're a plain girl with a mundane job and a boring life. How do I not have control over you?"

"Did you really think I was a good, little secretary from Staten Island?" I scoffed, "Try again."

"You lied to me?" I saw honest heartbreak in Kilgrave's eyes, "I really thought you were different. Turns out you're just another bitch. You there! Kill these two."

Loki looked around for a minute, "Are you talking to me?"

"Yes, you," Kilgrave ordered, "Kill them."

"Um, I don't think so," Loki walked over to me and like a reflex, I buried my face in his jacket, "Are you alright, darling? Did you miss me?"

"Of course, I did," I cuddled. I didn't want to be anywhere else. I had all I needed, "I'm fine."

"I still don't understand," Kilgrave growled, "Why can't I control either of you?"

"Mind control, eh?" Loki was intrigued, "I'd give anything to get my hands on something like that."

"No," I scolded. I really needed to get a squirt bottle for him, "Remember? Side of the angels now?"

"You're right," he agreed, "I'll be good."

"Why can't I control you?" Kilgrave repeated angrily.

"Kevin Thompson," I reached for my badge in my thigh holster, "On behalf of the Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement and Logistics Division, you're under arrest for more counts of manslaughter than I can shake a stick at."

"What did you just call me…?" Kilgrave's eyes turned red.

"Your real name," I confirmed, handcuffing him, "You did tell me to tell Jessica to help me find Kevin, didn't you? You don't think I put two and two together? And really? Of all the things you could've changed your name to, you pick Kilgrave? Makes you sound like a fifteen-year-old girl going through a phase."

"I can kill you myself," he snarled, "I will cut your tongue out."

"If you do that," I teased, "You'll never know how you can't control me. Or him."

"I'm guessing SHIELD has a contingency plan for something like me," Kilgrave figured.

"Yeah," I giggled to myself, "Him."

"Him?" he looked over at Loki, "Who are you…?"

"My real boyfriend," I introduced, "I never loved you, Kilgrave. I'm just one hell of an actress."

"I am…" my hand went over Loki's mouth.

"No," I put my foot down, "He doesn't need to know who you are."

"Hey," Jessica pulled us off to the side, "Can we talk for a minute?"

"Sure," I nodded, "What's up?"

"What are your plans for Kilgrave?" she asked, "Once you have him in custody."

"Classified," I cringed, keeping my voice down, "Sorry. You know, I'm sure if you were to join with SHIELD, plus a glowing recommendation from not only your new partner here, but his handler as well…"

"Handler?" Jessica gave me a look.

"Me," I confessed, "Let's just say this one wasn't exactly the model citizen before you now."

"Model citizen?" Loki chuckled.

"Anyway," I continued, pinching him in a very sensitive spot in his lower back, "I'm sure I could get you instant level seven clearance. Fury trusts me. That's why I'm in the position that I'm in. He didn't expect for he and I to fall in love, but here we are."

Jessica thought it over for a moment and grumbled, "As much as I want to deal with the assholes of SHIELD – no offense – I want Kilgrave dead by my hand with as soon as humanly possible. So I guess I'm in. I'll deal with SHIELD for the sake of killing him."

"Who said anything about killing him yet?" I wondered, "I'm not saying we're killing him yet. I understand why you want him dead, Jessica."

"Why do you want him dead?" Loki wondered, "I'd like to be kept informed."

"Kilgrave's had me," Jessica lowered her head, "He's made me do things that I'm not proud of. Hurt people that I wouldn't have wanted to hurt in a million years. I just want this to be over with. And it will never be over while he's still breathing."

"Don't worry," I assured, "The nerds in the lab can mix up an industrial sized and strength batch of fun stuff to keep him contained."

"I hope it's administered through a large suppository…"

"It can be," I grinned, admiring her spirit, "Hey, baby, did you bring the muzzle?"

"No," Loki said, "It's in my other jacket."

"Alright," I settled, "No need for the silver tongue to make an appearance."

"SHIELD has a muzzle?" Jessica asked, the confusion on her face a little too obvious.

"It was his muzzle first," I reminisced, putting my hands in Loki's pockets, "Sometimes, I think I should bring it home with me."

"Oh?" Loki's arms reached around behind him, grabbing a hold of me, "I thought the sound of my voice was one of those things you loved most about me."

"It is," I nuzzled my face in his back, "I've missed not having it at night."

"When you two are done being disgusting," Kilgrave gagged.

"Shut up," I snapped, "I haven't seen my man in a while. Leave us alone."

"But on your own time," he rolled his eyes, "You're making me diabetic."

"I told you to shut up," I growled, completely exasperated, "Might as well get him to HQ. Definitely need the muzzle there."

"Why?" Kilgrave taunted, "Afraid I'll compel a precious SHIELD agent?"

I grabbed Kilgrave by the cuffs and drove my knee into his lower back, making him drop to the floor, "I said hush."

"Could I trouble you for one question…?"

"Make it quick."

"Was any of it real?" he asked, "And be honest with me."

"Nope," I pulled him back up, "Moving on."

"Oh, no, no, no," Kilgrave went on, "I think I did have a little bit of an effect on you."

"Hey, Jessica," I said, "You're super strong, right?"

"Yeah," she nodded, "How'd you know that?"

"SHIELD keeps its tabs," I chuckled to myself, "Could you do me a favor?"

"It'd be my genuine pleasure," Jessica pulled her fist back, knocking Kilgrave unconscious.

"Thank you!" I chirped, "Your power is most appreciated."

"From all of us," Loki agreed, "He was started to get really annoying."

"Try dealing with him for the past month," I put it into perspective, "Every day. Pretending to enjoy his company? It's exhausting."

"We have a van waiting outside," Jessica threw him over her shoulder.

"Awesome," I sighed out, "Fury better give me, at least, tomorrow off. I may just say screw it and not come in."

"I already talked to Director Fury," Loki got my door for me while Jessica threw Kilgrave in the back, "You have more than tomorrow off."

"Thank you," I got in, "Maybe you and I can finally go somewhere."

"I'm almost positive that would violate my probation," Loki joked, "Bat those beautiful eyelashes at the director and maybe we will do just that."

"Guys," Jessica broke us up, "We have a job to finish. Kilgrave won't be out long."

"She has a point," I agreed. And off we went to SHIELD HQ with that asshole knocked out in the back. I was just glad to be back with Loki again. I didn't even care about Kilgrave at this point. It was finally time to go home.

 **A/N: Ok. I have a perfectly good excuse for why this is up late. I took this past Saturday off. Why, you may ask? I don't want to say I was post traumatic because that'll just make me sound like a drama queen. But I was woken up at three in the morning on Saturday only to find out that my garage was burning down, so I figured I could take a knee, sleep until one, binge some anime. I tried. Really and truly, I did. But I couldn't work. Brain was fixated on other stuff. In case you're worried or wondering, everyone's alright. Any other questions, you know where my inbox is. Now, it's currently 1:30AM on Monday, so I'm going to bed. Good night and I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	5. Chapter 5

Sleeping in my own bed. Oh, how I missed you. Without a second thought, I threw myself into the comforter stretched across my California king bed. The familiar black sheets and the soft gold pillows sucked me in like never before. Oh yes. Life was good. Again. Finally.

"Enjoying yourself, my love?" Loki chuckled in the doorway.

"You have no idea," I cuddled into the blankets.

"Yes," he joined me, "I do. The tower hasn't been the same without you. It's been so empty."

"Really?" I gave him a look, "I have a hard time believing that they left you here by yourself."

"You know what I mean," Loki pulled me against his chest, "I'm sorry, darling. I'm so sorry."

"For what, baby?"

"For putting you in Kilgrave's hands," he couldn't even look at me anymore.

"We know you couldn't have done it," I cuddled into him, "And Kilgrave would respond better to a pretty face. Don't get me wrong, Loki. You're beautiful. But something tells me you're not his type. Not to mention, if Kilgrave would've gotten a hold of you and found out who you are, there's no telling what would have happened. So, don't beat yourself up, alright?"

Loki let out a heavy sigh, "Alright."

"Besides," I started to tease him a little bit, "I'm the only one that can smack you around in this place."

"The only one I allow to smack me around," he corrected, "Anyone else gets punched. And then, I end up in a cell for a while."

"And I usually have a big mess to clean up," I rolled my eyes, "Speaking of big messes, where is everyone? I expected balloons and champagne."

"Mission," Loki said, "At least, I think that's where they are. They should be back soon."

"I should probably check in with Fury," I started to get up, but Loki kept me on the bed.

"No need to worry, my love," he assured, "I gave Director Fury a full report. And you have the next week off."

"Damn right, I do!" I squeaked. I looked up at the angel on my bed, "Thank you, Loki."

"You're welcome," he gently kissed my forehead, "Now, we have a little alone time together. What do you propose we do with it?"

"As much as I'd love for us to be extra snuggly," I rested my head on his chest, "I don't think I have it in me. Even if you were to do all the work."

"How about this then?" Loki proposed, "I will run the bathtub for you and get you something to eat. When I get back, I'll join you. Does that sound good?"

"That sounds amazing," I smiled, "But how do I know that when you go to get me food, you won't go down and start negotiating with Kilgrave?"

"Tell me something he had you do."

A list started rolling in my head. I had barely met the man and he had me naked with my legs spread on his bed. The sacrifices I had to make for the job. My dignity was definitely one of them. But on the same token, if I told Loki about those sacrifices, he wouldn't be wanting to ally with Kilgrave, but beat him within an inch of his life. I had to keep it simple, "He told me to kill you and Jessica."

"I knew that," he brushed me off, "That's not enough for me to not have a conversation with the man."

I guess I had to break out the big guns, "He had me slap myself across the face. I made the mistake of asking him about Jessica. It stung for a while."

Loki's heart shattered into a million pieces, "I thought you said he didn't hurt you…"

"He didn't," I clarified, "I did."

"While under his control," he snapped, "That I insisted you'd take."

"Loki," I stopped him, "You're doing it again. Go get me some Chipotle and quit overthinking."

"Yes, my lady," Loki bowed to me, giving me a kiss before he left. Goddamn, I missed him.

I slipped into the hot bath water that I so desperately needed. This was nice. This was very nice. If I wasn't careful, I may fall asleep right here. Damn near nodded off a couple times while I was on my bed.

 _I want to watch. And you're going to let me, aren't you? And with that beautiful smile of yours on your face._

Immediately, I jumped out of the bathtub. I heard Kilgrave's voice in my head. My shower from this morning. That creepy pervert watching me. The fact that he was in the building bound and gagged made me cringe. I wrapped up in my robe, went into the living room, poured myself a vodka sour, and sat my ass on the couch. I needed to drink the memory out of my brain.

Fwwwwhiiippp…

My heart started racing even faster than it already was. I looked around and found a Nerf bullet suctioned to the coffee table. Then, I cranked my neck back, staring up at the ceiling, "What the hell, Barton?"

"Welcome home," Clint jumped down from the rafters.

"Hell of a welcome," I slammed back my first drink.

"You alright?" he worried, "Any collateral damage?"

"Aces," I made another drink.

"Are you sure?" Clint asked, "You wouldn't be aces if you just freaked out in your bathroom."

"How long have you been here?" I wondered, feeling kind of violated. For more reasons than one.

"I met Loki in the elevator," he told, "Nice job catching that Kilgrave guy. Where is he?"

"Holding," I quivered.

"Hey, hey," Clint wrapped his arms around me, "He can't get you here. He won't get you here. Repeat that."

"He can't get me here," I parroted shakily, "He won't get me here."

"Again."

"He can't get me here," I spoke again, "Clint, what good is this supposed to be doing?"

"After what happened in New York," he explained, "Natasha was helping me come down from Loki being in my head. That's how she got the nightmares to stop."

"I haven't even been to sleep yet," I rested my head on Clint's shoulder, "I'm so tired, Clint. I'm so very tired. One can only be so strong for so long."

"I know, sweetheart," he agreed, "I know. Have you talked to Fury about some time off?"

"Loki did," I filled him in, making yet another drink, "Tomorrow morning, I'm going to put in for two weeks instead of one. I'm pretty sure I deserve it."

"You may want to slow down there," Clint took the Grey Goose bottle away from me, "Something tells me dealing with Fury with a hangover isn't a fun experience."

"And I'm sure Tony doesn't want me drinking up all his booze," I chuckled a bit. I motioned my hand from my chin out, "Thank you, Clint."

"Of course, kid," he gave me a smile. Always did when I'd sign for him, "What else am I here for? Speaking of, where's Loki?"

"In line at a Chipotle," I got up and put the vodka bottle back on the shelf, "A girl needs her burrito bowl after a long mission like that."

"God bless him," Clint giggled, "I'm going to go call it a night. The others should be trickling in shortly. Are you going to be alright by yourself?"

"I'll be fine," I assured, "I got my footing back."

"Atta girl," he popped me lightly in my shoulder, "Night."

"Good night."

I sent Clint off to bed and shut my eyes for a minute. He can't get me here…He won't get me here…I'm going to be ok. Hell, I might even go back into the bathtub. The last thing I wanted was for Loki to worry about me. Or any of the others, for that matter. Even having Clint worry about me made me a tad uncomfortable. I would be perfectly fine. Eventually.

 **A/N: Clint's such a sweetheart, isn't he? *heart eyes* And just as a side note, reviews are nice. Auntie Lumi can't put your imaginary cousins through college on views alone. Besides, I'm always taking requests. See you next chapter. xx**


	6. Chapter 6

Morning came faster than what I expected. The bright blue numbers on my alarm clock rang in 7AM. Loki's arm draped over me, pinning me against his body like he was afraid to lose me. As gently as humanly possible, I lifted his arm off me.

"Where do you think you're going, young lady?" Loki grumbled, pulling me back to my previous position.

"I have a job to do," I struggled to get back up. His eyes weren't even open! How did he have this much strength in him? Oh, yeah…He's a god, "Loki, let me go."

"And if I don't want to?" he smirked into my shoulder blades.

"Let me up," I stood my ground.

"I don't want to," Loki whined, "The Avengers will live without you for another five minutes. More than likely, they're all still probably asleep."

"Loki," I shook him off me, "As much as I'd love to, I need to get back to normalcy. And this is the best way to do it. Like nothing ever happened."

"Alright," he let me go, giving me a quick kiss, "I did a little shopping last night when I got your dinner. There's a fresh tin of loose earl grey in the cabinet."

"Thank you," I kissed him back. A little deeper than his, "You and me. Tonight. We'll go to that little cocktail lounge you love so much."

"It's not the cocktail lounge I love," he flirted, "It's the slinky black dress you wear every time we go there."

"And the piano that you can't help but take over," I wanted to get back in bed with him so bad…But I couldn't, "Tonight. You. Me. Cocktail lounge. Piano. Slinky black dress. Good?"

"I guess," Loki was so cute when he tried to pout.

I took a quick shower (like…superhuman quick. I didn't want to be in there any longer than I had to be. He can't get me here…He won't get me here.) and made my way into the kitchen. If I knew my dear Avengers like I thought I did, one thing was guaranteed to get them out of bed. And by the looks of the fridge, Loki knew exactly what that was. I'm sure he missed me, but I knew he missed my cooking skills just as much. Fresh blueberries. A big bag of flour. A fresh dozen eggs. Someone was wanting me to make my blueberry pancakes.

Ask and ye shall receive, I guess. I started mixing the batter, gradually adding the berries. Loki did one hell of a job picking ingredients for me. Those blueberries were beautiful. Perfect even.

"Morning," a voice chirped up from behind me, "Welcome home."

"Hey, Nat," I turned the griddle on, "It's good to be back."

"How you doing?" she asked, "Everything alright?"

"Everyone keeps asking me that," I groaned, "I'm fine. Just want to forget it ever happened and move on."

" _Dobroye utro,_ " another joined us. Considering it was Russian, I could only assume it was Barnes. Bucky always spoke Russian when he first woke up. And I, for one, found it adorable.

"Good morning," Natasha translated. I didn't know a lick of Russian, but I knew enough to know what he said, "Try speaking English, Barnes."

"Sorry," Bucky rubbed his eyes, "Habit."

"It's fine," I assured, "I'm used to it."

Almost immediately, Bucky's arms were around my shoulders, squeezing me tight, "It's good to have you home again."

"Admit it," I teased him, "You just missed my cooking."

"That, too," he chuckled a bit, "I missed having you at night."

"I missed you, too, Bucky," I swallowed the lump in my throat, "I missed all of you, honestly."

"It's too early for you to get sappy on us," Tony walked in and turned the coffee pot on, "We would've done all of this last night, but you were sleeping when most of us got in and Loki threatened limb removal if any of us woke you up."

"Oh, Tony," I rolled my eyes, "I missed you most of all, Tin Man."

"Excuse me," he corrected, "That's _Iron_ Man, thank you very much."

Even still half asleep, Tony's snarky attitude knew no bounds. As much as I couldn't stand it before my mission, I couldn't have been happier to hear it again, "Do forgive me."

"So, how'd the mission go?" Tony asked, joining Natasha and Bucky at the island, "Bring him in yet?"

"He's in holding," I reported, trying to shake Kilgrave out of my thought processes, "Can we not talk about it? If you want to know more, I put my report in."

"Ok," he let it go, "You need any help?"

"I got it," I brushed him off, "I have this down to a science, Tony. I think I can handle it."

"Alright," Tony left me alone. The kitchen was a sanctuary for me. It centered me, "So, Sleeping Beauty still in your room?"

"Tony," I scolded, flipping my first pancake, "Leave Loki alone."

"What?" he played innocent, "I wasn't going to do anything."

"Damn right, you weren't," I put my foot down, "You leave him alone. He's the God of Mischief, not you."

"I forgot what your mom voice sounded like," Tony giggled to himself.

"He's been through some rough shit in these past few weeks, too…"

"Language!"

I shook my head and laughed, transferring the pancakes from the pan to the gold platter I took from the cabinet, "I'm a big girl, Steve. And I'm going to talk like a sailor."

"We missed you around here, kid," Steve gave me the biggest hug I've gotten so far today. But I knew the biggest was yet to come.

"We've been through this already, Steve," Tony pointed out, "You're kind of late to the party."

"Tony…" I put the mom voice back on, "Play nice." 

I caught him sticking his tongue out at Steve out of the corner of my eye. Boys. I swear. It was way too early to deal with them. I had barely a cup of coffee under my belt. I was really starting to consider an offer Tony made me when I first moved into the tower and let him install the coffee pot in the bathroom.

"Has Fury called yet?" Steve asked.

"No," I shook my head, "But I'm going to see him later this morning. Why? Expecting another mission?"

"I like to keep busy," he grabbed the plates out of the cabinet for me, "Not like I have anything better to do."

"You have seventy years to catch up on," Natasha chuckled, "And you say you have nothing to do?"

"I'm pretty caught up," Steve almost sounded offended.

"Playstation or Xbox?" Tony asked.

"Nintendo."

"Thank you!" I gave Steve a high five.

"Does my sense of smell deceive me?" an all too familiar grumble shook me to my core. I wasn't expecting him to be here, "Are those the blueberry pancakes fit for royalty? Stark, you cannot recreate them no matter how hard you try. They are not the same."

"Hi, Thor," I turned the griddle off and jumped into his arms.

"My lady," he squeezed me tight. There's what I was looking for. The feeling of almost being broken in half, "Are you well?"

"Yes," I rolled my eyes, "You don't need to worry about us. Speaking of, what are you doing here? I thought you would still be on Asgard."

"A good will mission to Midgard," he set me down. Although, for my neck's sake, I wished he didn't. I was barely over five feet tall. Thor was enormous.

"Really?" I saw right through him, "And by good will mission, do you mean you're down here to check on your brother?"

"Maybe…" All of a sudden, the god before me turned shy.

"Trust me," I assured, "I have Loki in line. He just helped me catch a serial killer with telepathic powers."

"Telepathic?" Thor got nervous, "And Loki has been exposed to him?"

"Yes," I nodded, "Like I said, I have Loki in line. He's behaving himself. You can loosen your backpack leash a little, Thor."

"Backpack leash?" he wondered, "What is that?"

"Something we should've gotten for Loki a long time ago," Tony chimed in, "Modify it a little with a shock collar."

"Tony!" I snapped, "I am not awake enough for your snarky ass attitude yet! And we are not getting Loki a shock collar!"

"Why not?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"I'm not explaining it," I gave up, not wanting to explain Loki's…preferences over pancakes, "Breakfast is done. Thor, don't eat it all."

"Did you…?"

"Yes," I cut the god off, "I made extra. That's why I said not to eat it all."

"I give you my word," he promised, "I will not devour them all."

"Swear?" I gave him the big eyes, "You said the same thing at Thanksgiving. And we all know how that ended."

"I swear," Thor kissed the back of my hand.

"I have to go talk to Fury," I cleaned the counter off, "I'll be back in a little while, ok?"

"What's with all the noise?" a familiar face joined us in the kitchen. One I didn't expect to see here.

"Who are you?" Steve asked, looking her over.

"Jessica?" I gave her a look, "The hell are you doing here?"

"I told you," she explained, "I want to see Kilgrave bleeding from his eyes. If that means slumming it with the Avengers, then so be it. Fury said it was cool if I crashed here while my apartment's kind of in shambles."

"Slumming it with the Avengers?" I giggled, "Sure. You can slum it with the Avengers. Tony, that's alright with you, right?"

"Who is she exactly?" Tony asked.

"Jessica Jones," she introduced herself, "I'm a private investigator. Also superhuman."

"Superhuman?" she had Tony's interest, "Like Steve, superhuman?"

"I'm not in my nineties," Jessica clarified, "No offense, Captain. You look pretty damn good for your age."

"Amazing what sleeping for seventy years on ice does," Steve joked darkly.

"I've got super strength," Jessica went on, "In fact, I was about to go see Kilgrave and give him his daily beating."

"Not unattended," I put my foot down, "You'll end up killing him. We can't have that yet. When Loki wakes up, take him with you. Until then, hang out here. I just made breakfast. I'm going to go see Fury."

I grabbed my shoes and my holster and headed out the door and into the elevator. I liked talking to Fury as much as I liked getting a root canal without the anesthesia first. But this had to be done. I wasn't going to settle with a week of vacation time. Not after the shit I just went through. I deserved a damn month, but I wasn't going to be greedy. Two weeks would be fine.

"Agent," Fury greeted me as I walked into his office, filled to the brim with confidence.

"Director," I nodded.

"What brings you by?" he asked, "I thought you were on vacation."

"That's what brings me by," I explained, "I need more than just a week."

"Do you now?" he sat in his chair, looking like an evil villain, "And how much time off do you think you need?"

"You don't understand what I've been through," I fought, "I've done things for Kilgrave that I'm not exactly proud of. Some things that make my skin crawl at the mere thought of them. All I'm asking is for another week, sir."

"Alright," he agreed, "You can have another week."

I looked at my boss very skeptically, "Really? No catch?"

"You can take three weeks," Fury offered, "But that will come with a catch."

"I knew this sounded too easy," I sat down, "What's the three week catch?"

"A full psych evaluation," he negotiated, "If this Kilgrave guy is as bad as Loki's report says he is, we need to make sure you're not completely messed up in the head."

"I'm not."

"No more than usual?" Fury teased.

"No more than usual," I held back a smile.

"Believe it or not," Fury grabbed some paperwork out of his filing cabinet, "We did miss you around here, kid. It reminded me of a time when we didn't have Coulson for a while. Don't realize what you got until you don't got it anymore."

"Thank you, sir," I felt a warmth radiating from inside, "I missed it here, too. Anywhere but with Kilgrave is good enough for me."

"How bad was it?" he wondered, "Loki didn't see all of it."

"It was rough," I cringed at the memory, "I'm sorry, sir, but I'm not really ready to talk about it yet."

"When you get back from vacation," Fury stipulated, "You're getting that psych evaluation."

"Director Fury," I spoke softly, "I have another request for that vacation time."

"Oh?"

"Do you think," I took a BIG leap, "I could take Loki along with me?"

"Sure," he allowed, "You'll be taking care of yourself AND I won't have Loki to deal with? Tell me where I lose there."

"Really?"

"And handle Loki, the pain in the ass, God of Mischief without his handler?" Fury laughed a bit to himself, "No, thank you. I'll have to pass."

"Thank you, sir," I grinned.

"Anything else you need?" he asked.

"No," I shook my head, "Everything else is just super."

"Fantastic," the boss praised, "Now, get out of my office and go enjoy yourself."

"Yes, sir," I bowed out and went down to the lobby. I pushed my passkey into our elevator and took it back up to the penthouse. Home sweet home. Clint and Bruce had joined everyone else for breakfast, but Loki was still nowhere to be found. Fortunately, my room was just barely inside the door, so I could sneak in without anyone knowing.

Sure enough, Loki was still sleeping soundly. I crawled in next to him, burrowing into his shoulder, listening to his heartbeat. The soft, rhythmic pounding was almost hypnotic. Damn, I missed that.

But all of a sudden, it started racing. And Loki's face contorted to pain. No. I knew Loki's pain face. This was different. This was fear.

"Loki," I shook him, "Loki, wake up."

"Mmmm…" he groaned, slowly opening his eyes, "Good morning."

"Barely," I gave him a kiss, "Loki, it's eleven o'clock."

"You're alright," he held me closer, "That's all that matters."

"Are you?" I worried, "Nightmare?"

"Yes," he rubbed his eyes, "I'm fine now. I have you. That's all that matters."

"So," I snuggled, "I talked to Fury this morning."

"Did you?"

"We have the next three weeks off," I told, "Where shall we go?"

"We?" Loki looked at me funny, "You and I have the next three weeks off?"

"Fury didn't want to have to deal with you," I reiterated, "So anywhere I go, you're on my hip."

"Anywhere?" a dirty grin stretched across Loki's face.

"Yes," I confirmed, "Be glad you're going to be attached to me. I think Stark's margin doodles for the next couple days may be an electro-charged backpack leash."

"What?"

"Never mind," I giggled a little.

"What do you have planned for today?" Loki asked, "Other than our trip to the cocktail lounge later."

"I need to do some shopping," I started making a list in my head.

"I just did the shopping," Loki pouted, "Did I not do a good enough job?"

"Not that kind of shopping," I clarified, "We're about to go on vacation and my closet's a grave disappointment."

"Oh," he gave in, "Wait a minute, do I have to go with you for that?"

"You're attached to my hip for the next three weeks," I smirked, "Yes, you have to go with me for that. It's either you come with me or you serve as Tony's test subject for the backpack leash."

"So, it's hell either way," Loki grumbled, "Shopping with the indecisive woman I love or being electrocuted at the hands of Tony Stark. When did you say we were leaving?"

"That's what I thought," I beamed victoriously, "I'll be ready in an hour or so."

"Alright, darling," Loki stole a quick kiss from me, "As awful as the day may be, at least we get to spend it together."

"That's the spirit!" I chirped, crawling out of bed, "I'm going to make sure the guys don't need anything before we leave."

"Make sure those margin doodles never make it to light," Loki begged.

"I know where the incinerator is," I left my beautiful god to his devices and went back to my favorite group of Earth's mightiest.

"Hey," I caught Clint's eye first. Big surprise there, "How you doing, kid? Better since I saw you last?"

"Much," I nodded, surrendering to his embrace, "Thanks, Clint."

"Good to have another pretty face in the tower again," Bruce gave me a little smile.

"Sorry, Bruce," I apologized, "It won't be for long. I'm leaving for vacation tomorrow. I'll be gone for three weeks."

"Does this mean I can test my backpack leash?" Tony chimed in.

"No," I rolled my eyes, "Loki's coming with me. He and I are going to go shopping in a bit. Anyone need anything while we're out?"

"Not that I can think of," Natasha spoke for the entire group.

"Alright," I threw my bag over my shoulder and undid my knife from the inside of my thigh, "Don't get into too many shenanigans, kids. Play nice."

"Are you ready, darling?" a pair of hands moved to my waist and a face nuzzled in my neck. Instinctively, my elbow jabbed backwards as hard as I could into the ribs attached to the face and the hands. And the knees attached to the ribs attached to the face and the hands hit the hardwood floor and an uncomfortable moan escaped his mouth, "Was that necessary…?"

"Oh my God…" I gasped, helping Loki up, "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to…"

"I understand, my love," Loki held me against his chest, "You just caught me off guard. Knocked the wind out of me a little."

"Really and truly," I was damn near on the verge of tears, "I…"

"Hush," Loki put his finger to my lips, "You said you had shopping to do. Let's go."

I waved my goodbyes to my dear friends and took the elevator down to the garage with Loki by my side. I started having flashbacks to the last time he and I went shopping. Christmas. And it was disastrous. But it was better than leaving him to be Tony's personal lab rat.

 **A/N: Well, kids, here we are. Another chapter down. Now, if any of you who are artistically gifted could draw Tony, Loki, and the electro-charged backpack leash, that'd be fantastic. Post it to Tumblr and tag me in it. That's LumiOlivierLithium. That'll be one of those things that'll just make my day. So, I hope you enjoyed your domesticated Avengers and I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	7. Chapter 7

Ah, a little retail therapy with the man I love. Exactly what I needed. First things first, I might as well make Loki smile. I needed a new swimsuit. I planned on getting some sun and the one I have now is falling apart at the seams.

"You know, darling," Loki scanned through the rack with me, "If you were to go shopping like this more often, I'd be less likely to complain about the affair."

"This is just the first stop," I told, "Trust me. The hellish part is yet to come."

"I could get used to this, though," Loki admitted, "How much do you love me?"

"Why do you…" I looked up to see a navy blue and white striped bikini in his hand, "Oh, son of a bitch. Hell no!"

"Come on," Loki begged, "Please?"

"No way in hell," I put my foot down, "I am not putting on a bikini."

"Please…?"

"Fine," I pouted, "I'm not going to like it and I'm just going to piss and moan the whole time."

"You never know!" Loki sang as I snatched todays pain in my ass out of his hand, "You may like it."

"I have a better chance picking up Mjolnir," I grumbled, dragging my feet to an empty dressing room. I hated bikinis. With a burning passion. They made me feel huge. Not to mention, the lovely collection of scars I've accumulated over the years working for SHIELD stuck out like a sore thumb. As soon as I had all my clothes off, I looked myself over in the mirror. Not only did I see scars that I'd rather forget about, but some bruises that brought back some really bad flashbacks.

"Now, now, darling," I heard _his_ voice in my head, going back to one of my first nights with him, "I will break you. I can promise you that. You will behave yourself. And you will be mine."

"Please," I winced, in so much pain, "No more…"

"Take it," he growled, beating me with a riding crop.

"No!" I screeched.

"He's not here!" Loki held me in his arms on the floor of my dressing room, "It's alright. I'm right here, my love. I'm not going anywhere."

"I need a drink," I pulled myself together, wiping the tears out of my eyes before he could see.

"It's noon."

"I'll get a tequila sunrise and call it breakfast," I got out of Loki's lap, got redressed, and left the store empty handed. I honestly thought I would've been able to handle a little shopping without going into a Kilgrave flashback. I was going to have a nice day out of the tower, spend some quality time with Loki. So much for that idea.

And I was ready to poke out the judgmental eyes of our waitress when I ordered a Long Island iced tea with lunch. I was still pretty shaken up about what happened while I was looking for a new swimsuit, but I could get past it. Eventually. I was alright. He can't get me here. He won't get me here. Besides, he's sitting in a maximum security holding cell at SHIELD HQ right now. And there's no way he compelled any of the guards. Kilgrave's injected with anesthetic every couple of hours. As an added precaution, all the guards are wearing headphones. Everything would be fine.

"Are you alright…?" Loki worried, "And be honest with me."

"God, no," I took a good, heavy drink, "But after what I just went through, that's no surprise."

"Do you mind if I ask about the bruises?" he treaded lightly.

"Yes. I mind very much."

"You don't want to talk about it, do you?"

"Not in the least bit," I shoved a mozzarella stick in my mouth, "I'm dreading when we come back."

"Why is that, darling?" Loki played with my fingers.

"Fury wants me to have a full psych evaluation," I rolled my eyes, "I told him. I'm fine. I'd rather forget it happened and move on."

"Obviously, you're not," he argued, "Look at yourself. You broke down in a dressing room…"

"And I've been doing that since I was a kid," I cut him off, "I wasn't always this cute, little thing you see in front of you. I was a chubby kid and going into dressing rooms was absolute hell for me. The breakdowns are nothing new."

"When you're yelling at someone who isn't there?"

"Alright," I let out a heavy sigh, "That is new."

"Your bruises?"

"Him," I tried to shake the memory from slipping back into my thoughts, "I told you I didn't want to talk about it, Loki…"

"Maybe you should!" I looked into my god's eyes to find the worry and the heartache he carried for me, "Because drinking and holding it in isn't going to make it any better."

He was right. I didn't want to admit it, but he was right. I didn't want to go into the Kilgrave files in my brain, but I was going to have to eventually. No one wants to admit they're crazy. I wasn't crazy. I knew that much. I could almost guarantee that whatever therapist they assign to me was going to have a field day with my head.

After my fourth Long Island, I was good enough to tackle the shopping again. I will admit, though. I did have a nice buzz going. When I was a little drunk, I was calm. When I'm calm, I don't think about Kilgrave. When I don't think about Kilgrave, I was good. I managed to scab three weeks of clothes, a new set of luggage, and a new swimsuit! And before too long, Loki and I were back at the tower.

"Do you still want to go out tonight?" Loki asked, "We don't have to."

"Yes, we do," I assured, "I could use a good night out."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Loki!" I snarled, "God! All I want is a night with you before we leave for the Virgin Islands. Is that too much to ask for?"

"I guess," Loki caved, "You go get ready. I have some things to take care of."

"Ok," I went into my closet and got that black dress Loki loved so much. And I looked pretty damn good, if I do say so myself. I paired it with an emerald necklace Loki got me for my birthday and a pair of silver heels.

"Holy shit," a voice chimed behind me, "You got a date?"

"I actually do," I beamed, "So, Jessica, how are you adjusting to life in the tower?"

"It's not bad," she shrugged, "The food's decent, the cable's free. Can't complain. How about you?"

"What about me?" I painted my lips a muted shade of red.

"How are you adjusting?" she asked, "Life back in the tower. After everything."

"Did Loki send you?" I assumed.

"I was eavesdropping on him and Thor," Jessica told, "Look, I know what it's like, being had by Kilgrave."

"But I don't," I clenched my fists tight on the bathroom sink, "Everything I did, I could've said no. I didn't have to do any of the shit he told me to. I did it of my own free will. You can justify it by being under his control. I can't. I was controlling myself. Do you know how many times I had my ankles behind my head for that asshole? How much bodily harm I've done to myself for him? To anyone else? The smiles I had to fake? All while I was dying inside?"

"Yeah, I do," Jessica sat on the counter, "it's like being an outsider looking in, but you're in your own body. Being had by Kilgrave...I can't imagine a more torturous hell. And the guilt. The overwhelming guilt of everything you know you did wrong while you were under his control. I know how shitty it is."

"How do you cope?" I let out a heavy sigh.

"I drink and suppress the hell out of it," she admitted, "And I try to make things right by helping as many people as I can. That's why I was so quick to help you when you walked into my office. Kilgrave knows that. And he won't hesitate to use it against me. You, on the other hand? You genuinely broke his heart."

"I did?"

"He loved you," Jessica told, "I could see it all over his face. He used to look at me like that and he was obsessed with me. It pissed him off that I would never love him back and that's what made him snap. And I ran from him. But then you. You came along and he fell in love with you. He wanted you more than he wanted me dead and that's saying something."

"Huh..." I didn't think a monster like Kilgrave was capable of love.

"Didn't you say you had a date tonight?" Jessica changed the subject, "Who's the lucky man taking you out?"

"Who else?" I put on the finishing touches, "The beautiful disaster in the living room."

"Loki?"

"Yep."

"Funny," she chuckled, "I would've pegged you as the type to go for guys more like Thor. What made you go with Loki?"

"Originally," I began, "Loki was just an assignment. I can still hear Fury's voice clear as a bell. Keep an eye on the pain in the ass demigod. Then, he was a friend. Then, he was a really good friend. Then, he and I ended up sleeping together. Then, we became us. Not really much to tell."

"You shouldn't keep him waiting," Jessica shooed me out of the bathroom, "Go get 'em, tiger."

"Thanks, Jessica," I giggled to myself.

"You need anything?" she asked, "Condoms? Plan B? Ride to the clinic?"

"No. I'm good."

"You kids be safe tonight..."

"Bye, Mom," I slid my silver heels on and walked out into the living room to find Loki. I nuzzled my face in his back, ignoring the wolf whistles coming from some of the others, "Ready?"

"Are you?" he asked.

"Yes, sir," I confirmed, "Let's go."

"Are you sure he can't stay?" Tony begged, "I almost have a prototype."

"No," I rolled my eyes, "Bruce, could you do me a favor?"

"Sure," he nodded, "What's up?"

"Go destroy the prototype," I requested, taking Loki's hand.

"I'll get right on it," Bruce complied, "Sorry, Tony."

"Don't do it, Bruce," Tony scolded, "Don't touch my toys."

"I won't," he pacified.

"Double wrap before you tap," Tony called out, going down to his lab space.

Loki looked over at me in confusion like he always did when a Midgardian idiom was lost on him. I just shook my head, "Alright. We're off. Jess, leave Kilgrave alone."

"No promises," she said. At least she was honest.

"The liquor cabinet's over there," I pointed out, "Most of it is imported."

"Hello, champagne wishes and caviar dreams," Jessica went over to acquaint herself with the mini bar.

"Don't wait up," I waved them all off and took the elevator down to the garage.

"So, my love," Loki asked, "Which car are we taking this evening?"

Tony gave me unlimited access to his vehicles. Not to mention the plethora of SHIELD's armored car collection. But to be honest, I didn't want any of them, "Think we could just walk? It's a beautiful night. It'd be a shame to let it go to waste."

"I don't know…"

"Come on, Loki," I wrapped myself around his arm, "Kilgrave rarely let me outside. Please?"

"Alright," he caved, kissing my forehead, "It's not that far anyway. I guess we can walk."

"Thank you," I nuzzled my face into his shoulder and the two of us wandered the streets of Manhattan until we hit the cocktail lounge that Loki and I loved so much. Tony showed me this place when I first started working for SHIELD. I was fresh off my twenty-first birthday and I had yet to celebrate. A lot of memories were made in this place.

"What are you drinking tonight?" Loki sat me down at the end of the bar.

"You know what I like," I spun around on my barstool.

"Scotch rocks and a blue kamikaze," Loki ordered. He had gotten really good at that in his exile here. Then again, he did have a good teacher. Or handler.

I watched carefully as the bartender shook my drink with one hand and pour Loki's drink with the other. Oddly mesmerizing. I couldn't wait to get my lips on that glass. And I loved when Loki knew my favorite drink off the top of his head. Just warmed my heart to no end. Or maybe that was the blue raspberry vodka and the triple sec going down to my toes.

Ring, ring.

"Hello?" I answered my phone.

"Hi, baby!" a voice chimed on the other end.

"Hi, Mom!" I beamed, holding the phone away from me, "It's my mom."

"Send her my love," Loki insisted, playing with the stir straw in his scotch.

"How are you, sweetheart?" Mom asked, "I got a call from Phil saying you just got back from a mission."

"Phil…?" I thought out loud, "Oh! Coulson. Yeah. I came back last night."

"How'd it go?" Mom wondered, "Pass or fail?"

"Successful," I filled her in. Mom understood that I couldn't tell her much about what I did. I had to get permission from Fury to tell her I worked for SHIELD in the first place.

"That's my girl!" she praised, "And how's Loki?"

"Sends his love," I nuzzled into his chest, "He and I are taking off for the Virgin Islands tomorrow morning."

"You deserve it," Mom assured, "If I could go into Fury's office and give him a piece of my mind without being jumped by other SHIELD agents, I would. He works you too hard."

"Doesn't work me hard enough," I giggled under my breath, "But the last mission took a lot out of me, so I'm off for the next three weeks."

"Just you…?"

"Loki, too," I knew she was fishing.

"Why don't you push your trip to the Virgin Islands back a little?" Mom insisted, "Come upstate for a few days? I haven't seen you and Loki since Christmas."

I knew it. As soon as I told her that I'd have time off, she would try to wiggle into it somehow. She'd manage to guilt me. I gave Loki my phone while I grabbed my drink, "Talk to my mother."

"Hello, Charlotte," Loki accepted, "How are you?"

"I love you," I whispered in his free ear, kissing his cheek.

"Tomorrow?" he mulled it over, "We'd be happy to, but we already have our tickets. Pushing it back would be a complete nightmare. With the way our last mission went, we don't need anymore headaches...I understand that, but...Yes, ma'am...Yes, ma'am...Hold on..."

Loki gave my phone back. I shook my head and rolled my eyes at him, "Silver tongue turn to lead?"

"Talk to your mother," he ordered another drink.

"Hi, Mom," I took it back, "Me again."

"He has the most beautiful speaking voice," she gushed, "If you two were to get married..."

"Mother!" I squeaked.

"All that aside," Mom turned more serious, "What happened on your last mission? It sounded rough."

"You know I can't tell you," I cuddled back into Loki's shoulder, "It's classified."

"Alright, Quantico," she pouted, "I hate that you can't tell me anything. I'm your damn mother, for God's sake!"

I started to hear static on the other end, "Hey, Mom, could you speak up a little? I'm getting some interference. Are you running the microwave or something? Standing by the surround sound?"

"No," her voice garbled a little, "It's not on my end."

"Must be everyone else's phones in here," I assumed, "I'll call you when we land tomorrow, ok?"

"Alright, sweetheart," Mom sang, "I love you!"

"Love you, too," I ended the call and put my phone back in my bag, "She's right..."

"About what, darling?" Loki asked, sitting me on his lap.

"We should make more of an effort to go see her," I felt guilty.

"Maybe we could get her a cat," he teased.

"No," I laughed, "Mom hates cats. And she's allergic. Loki, we need to go see her soon."

"Well, my love," he cradled me, "We have three weeks to do with what we wish. I'm sure we can fit visiting your mother in there somewhere. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a thing to go do."

I grinned like a Cheshire Cat, knowing exactly what that thing was, "What should I expect tonight? Mozart or Chopin?"

"You'll see," Loki gave me a kiss and started heading for the piano. The room was pretty dead. Nothing quite like Loki's piano playing to make it start moving a little more. I moved closer toward the front to get a better view.

Normally, when Loki would play piano for me, he'd stick with classical composers he knew I loved. Occasionally, he'd venture out from that and take something from a movie score or a video game, but somehow, it'd always come back to me. However, tonight was entirely different.

Once in a while, Loki would either catch me singing in the shower (which usually followed with him joining me in said shower) or in the car or while I'm working on a report and sometimes, I'd have a guilty pleasure pop song. I had one that was the most beautiful slow jam I had heard in a while that warmed my heart every time I heard it. But that was the one no one knew about. Or so I thought.

The opening notes started chiming from my boyfriend's fingertips. And the first line came out of his mouth, "What would I do without your smart mouth…?"

And my heart stopped. I didn't think anyone knew about my love for John Legend, let alone "All of Me". The more he continued in the song, the more I had to swallow the lump in my throat followed by a kamikaze chaser. As per usual, as the song came to a close, an uproar of applause shook the lounge to the foundation and Loki wrapped his arms around me, "What was that you were saying about my silver tongue, my love?"

"You dick," I wiped my eyes, "How dare you?"

"Hey," he lifted my face up to his, kissing me deeply, "I love you. And I meant every word."

"How did you know?" I wondered.

"Honestly?" Loki shrugged, "Lucky guess. I had heard it a few times while you were gone and every time I heard it, I thought of you."

"It does kind of describe us perfectly, doesn't it?" I let out a tiny yawn.

"Yes, it does," Loki scooped me up, "Now, you, young lady, have a flight to catch in the morning."

"So do you," I reminded.

"Where else would I want to be?"

I loved him so much…

Loki and I walked home. More like I stumbled while Loki kept me steady. We had to come in as quietly as humanly possible. I was almost positive that everyone was asleep already. Except for Tony. He was probably still up tinkering, but he didn't need to see me sloppy drunk. Once in our friendship was plenty. Not to mention how emotionally spent I was. I didn't have it in me to deal with anyone at this point.

But none of that mattered. In six short hours, I would be on a plane headed to the Virgin Islands with the god I loved, far away from the sociopath that I loathed. For now, I'd take my own version of paradise. Half naked in Loki's arms, drifting off into a well-deserved sleep.

 **A/N: Hi, guys! I love writing really fluffy chapters. Honestly, this one turned out different than what I expected. I had visions of Loki being a pain in the ass the whole time they were out shopping, but instead, I went the PTSD route. And you know what? I'm quite content with that. The beautiful layers of psychology woven into this story make me so happy. Now that we have that out of the way…**

 **Can wE JUST TALK ABOUT THE LOUNGE INCIDENT? I had actually been planning that for a while. "All of Me" just happened to be the song to fall into my lap. I wanted something that was simple, sweet, and heavily piano based. Not to mention, when I heard the first line, my first thought was Loki. Thanks, Spotify! And I didn't think this story had enough fluffy goodness in it. So! Now, we have vacation to think about. The Virgin Islands. Some VERY beautiful scenery there. I hope to go myself one day…One day…*sigh***

 **And one more thing before I go…I'm going to feel silly for even asking this, but how do we feel about moving the posting date of this up from Saturdays to Fridays? Because the way my current posting schedule is set up right now is Kuroshitsuji updates on Wednesdays, Fullmetal Alchemist updates on Thursdays, and this updates on Saturdays. That leaves Friday as an awkward gap in my other writing. And since I find myself working on this one on Fridays anyway, I thought, what the hell? Why not post then, too? Would that be alright? I'm thinking I will. Reviews are always appreciated and I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	8. Chapter 8

I felt like I got thrashed by, what we like to call around here, the other guy. Note to self: Don't get trashed the night before I have to take flight the next morning. I looked over at my clock. It was almost one in the afternoon.

Shit! It was almost one in the afternoon! Our flight was for six! I frantically sprang out of bed, immediately regretting it. I swallowed my nauseam and got dressed. Where the hell was Loki?

I walked out to the living room in search of my boyfriend, who sat on the couch with his brother, watching Steve watch the Sound of Music. I had suggested it to him ages ago. I had him at singing Nazis.

"Loki," I freaked, "What the hell are we doing still here? Our flight left at six! That was seven hours ago!"

"Relax, my love," Loki pulled me down to the couch, putting me between him and Thor, "I took care of it. I figured you could use the sleep. Now, hush. He's about to see how they escape from the Nazis."

"Loki," I snarled, "I don't care if Steve's about to see the Von Trapp children escape the Nazis. We missed our flight!"

"How are you feeling?" he worried.

"Pissed off and hungover!"

"Been there!" Tony chimed from the kitchen.

"My lady," Thor took my hand, "If you're not well, you should be resting."

"I got our flight switched to tomorrow," Loki filled me in, "Don't worry about it."

I was ready to fight my hangover with fire. And fortunately, I had the man to do it. It was past noon. I could drink, "Hey, Tony!"

"Yes, dear?" Tony perked up.

"I'm fighting fire with fire," I ordered, "Be a lamb and make Mommy dear a drink."

"Bloody Mary?" he asked, skipping down to the mini bar.

"Gross," I gagged, "Bloody Mary is a no go for me. They're disgusting."

"Blasphemy!" Tony screeched.

"Dammit, Tony!" I scolded, "Do you mind?"

"Sorry," he apologized, "Mimosa?"

"Yes, please," I rested my throbbing head on my god's shoulder, "Loki, I hurt."

"I know, darling," he cradled me, "Rest is the best thing you can do right now. This will pass."

"Here," Tony gave me my mimosa, "This should make you feel all better."

"Thank you, Tony," I took small sips from my champagne flute, "Oh, dear God…"

"By the way," Tony said, "We're out of orange juice. Had to use mango."

"This is the best mimosa I've ever had," I praised, "Never make them with orange juice again."

"Yes, ma'am."

"So," Steve thought out loud, "They live out their lives in Switzerland now?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "Congratulations, Steve. You've finally watched _The Sound of Music._ "

"You had me at singing and dancing Nazis," he giggled, "Not bad."

"Not bad?" I gasped, "Julie Andrews is a queen and this movie is flawless!"

"She's actually a queen?" Steve gave me a look.

"Sort of," I confirmed, "Genovia, but that's a different movie for a different day."

"Now, my love," Loki held me closer, "We have an entire day to kill. What, pray tell, do we do?"

"I'm going to go check on things downstairs," I pushed myself off the couch.

"Really?" he pouted, "You've been officially on vacation for fourteen hours and you're already going back to work?"

"I'm not on vacation yet," I pointed out, "Someone thought that sleeping through our flight time was a good idea. Besides, I could use something mind numbing to do. I'm sure Fury's got something for me."

"Come on," he tried pulling me back down, "I'm sure Director Fury can manage without you."

"The rest of you can barely tie your shoes without me," I teased, "If it weren't for me, Steve and Tony would kill each other on a regular basis, you and Thor would be at each other's throats, Clint would be constantly MIA, Natasha would be fed up with all of you, and Bruce would have this place reduced to a pile of rubble. I'm the undercover glue that holds the Avengers together. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go see Fury. Anybody? While I'm downstairs?"

Silence. I gave Loki a quick kiss while Tony went through the library of movies he had for Steve, since Steve still didn't know how to run the Blu-Ray player. Loki successfully pulled me back to his lap, kissing me a little deeper, "Hurry back."

"I will," I assured, "By the way! I got a text from Darcy. Her and Jane are coming over tonight. Tony, you still have the projector set up from New Year's?"

"Of course," he scoffed.

"And Darcy's bringing you a present, Steve," I went on, "A nice collection of foreign films."

"Sounds good," Steve perked up, "Foreign where?"

"Japan."

"And by foreign films," Tony teased, "You mean she's bringing _Spirited Away_ and _My Neighbor Totoro_?"

" _Howl's Moving Castle_ , too," I grinned, "So, movie night in the tower. I'll see you guys later."

I slipped my shoes on and headed down to Fury's office. Loki was right. Barely on vacation and I was already going stir crazy. He and I were supposed to be sitting beachside with a big, fruity cocktail that everyone would make fun of me for drinking. But no. I got to sleep off a rough hangover instead. God bless him. I couldn't have dealt with flying today anyway.

I knocked on the office door of our fearless leader, "Hey, boss, got a minute?"

"What are you doing here?" Fury wondered, "I thought you and Loki were leaving this morning."

"We were supposed to," I explained, "But Loki and I went out last night and I was a little hungover this morning, so he let me sleep it off. We missed our flight. We leave tomorrow."

"Which brings me to my original question," he reiterated, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I got nothing to do today and I'm bored out of my skin," I chuckled, "Any busy work?"

"I got nothing," Fury shrugged, "Sorry, kid."

"Sir," the door swung open behind me, "I have a package for you."

"Coulson!" I threw my arms around my favorite SHIELD agent in the entire building.

"Hey, kiddo!" he hugged me tight, "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be sipping hurricanes on a beach somewhere by now?"

"Missed my flight," I pouted, "Tomorrow. I'm looking for busy work."

"Actually," Coulson suggested, "If you're looking for something to do and you're the only person I trust doing this..."

"Give Lola a bath?" I figured.

"If it's not too much to ask for."

"That's actually perfect," I took it, "I'm guessing she's tucked in her bed?"

"Where else would she be?" Coulson threw me the keys, "Inside and out."

"Can do," I gave him a salute.

"Now, get out of my office," Fury kicked me out, "Agent Coulson and I have some business to discuss."

"Alright," I skipped out of Fury's office and started heading for Coulson's parking spot.

Hello, Lola. Phil Coulson's 1962 Corvette was his pride and joy. The number one rule of becoming a part of his team was to NEVER touch Lola. My first day on the job I swooned over her. My love and appreciation for her was enough for Coulson to give me special permission to not only touch her but detail her as well. I considered it a great honor.

I stuck the key in her ignition and backed her out into the facility where I had more room to get around her. Coulson was very particular about how she was taken care of. I got the water ready and got to work. Right now, I would've hated someone to walk in on me doing this. As miniscule as it may come off, this was the most special of special ops.

And I looked like something out of a bad porno. A knotted up red plaid shirt, a pair of cut off shorts, and my lacy black bra peeking out from behind the knot. In my defense, I didn't want to get my shirt all wet. I may have to go out yet today. If we were having movie night at the tower, I would have to go on a snack run.

As careful as humanly possible (so I didn't accidentally deploy anything), I wiped the dash off with some dusting wipes. Unscented. No air freshener. And a kiss on her dash before I leave. Coulson knows when I don't give Lola her kiss. He swears the engine doesn't feel right. For an inanimate object, Lola did have a personality. And an attitude to match. But still. She was a good way to kill the rest of the afternoon.

I pulled her back into Coulson's spot and went to give him back his keys. He wasn't in his office. Must have been with Fury yet. I heard a voice on the other side of the door that didn't belong to Coulson or Fury. If I didn't know any better, it sounded like Loki on the phone.

"Scotch rocks and a blue kamikaze," I heard. That was our drink order from last night.

"Hello?" another voice chimed in, "Hi, Mom! It's my mom."

Me? What the hell...?

"He did say it'd be easier than an actual evaluation," Fury said, "She wouldn't have opened up to an actual doctor."

"No way," Coulson agreed, "Don't get me wrong. I love her like she was my own, but to get her to be open and honest with anyone other than Loki would've been a disaster. I'm kind of surprised we didn't think of that before."

"He's not called the God of Mischief for fun," Fury pointed out.

…What?

I dropped Coulson's keys in his mailbox and headed back up to the tower. I shook with blind rage in the elevator. When it opened up, Jane and Darcy had just got here and Tony was putting My Neighbor Totoro in the Blu-Ray player. Loki was sitting on the edge of the couch, waiting for me. Without another thought, before he could even say hi, I grabbed him by his wrist and dragged him into our bedroom. I threw him onto the bed and slammed the door behind me.

"Ok," he smirked, "This is different. Usually I'm the dominant, but I can try submissive tonight."

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" I screeched, "YOU WERE WEARING A WIRE?"

"Oh," his cocky attitude dropped, "Let's not be too rash, darling."

"No," I growled, "There's no such thing as too rash right now! YOU WERE WEARING A WIRE?"

"Please," Loki tried to settle me, "Let me explain."

"You don't need to," I snapped, "Fury and Coulson explained it plenty. I can't open up to anyone. My emotions are my weakness, Loki. And I show that to ONE PERSON. Out of everyone here, I show my real vulnerabilities to ONE PERSON. And that one person just pissed me off and betrayed my trust."

"We're worried about you," Loki spoke softly, "What Kilgrave did…"

"I know what Kilgrave did," I quivered, "I was there. What I don't need is a constant reminder of it! I don't need to be worried over. I'm fine. I want to move on from it. I want to wash my hands of Kilgrave and never think about it ever again. Now, get the hell out of my sight before I drive you through the wall."

"Alright," he obliged, "I'll go. Are you going to come out any time soon?"

"Bite me," I shoved him out the door and slammed it in his face.

I couldn't believe him. I loved Loki. More than anyone in the world. He was my everything. For him to turn around and do something like this when I'm the most unstable? A part of me could understand why he did it, but that didn't give Fury the right to set him up with a wire. I'm not a mission. I'm not someone that needs to be taken care of. I can take care of myself. I'm a big girl, dammit. I didn't need Fury playing my dad. I didn't need Loki playing my shrink. I'd be fine if people would just drop it.

I needed to punch something. Or someone. Fortunately for me, I had a personal punching bag in lock up. I slipped out of my room with an iPod in my hand and my good headphones and snuck downstairs. I sent the security guys away and opened Kilgrave's cell.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

I didn't say anything. He didn't need to hear my voice. He didn't deserve it. I put my headphones on. I cranked some loud, bassy techno. The good stuff that got my heart racing. I pulled Kilgrave onto his feet and took out my frustrations. I started with that pretty face of his. And I wasn't going to stop until I saw blood.

"What are you doing?" he whined.

But I kept going. I moved lower after I felt the pop in his jaw. I threw Kilgrave on the ground and started stomping on his chest. I was going to make sure this asshole couldn't move tomorrow.

"Please," Kilgrave begged, "Stop."

I threw him against the wall and started in on his junk. I was pissed off enough to rip his dick off with my bare hands, but I wasn't going to. That was a little extreme, even for me. As much as I hated this man in front of me, at least I knew he wouldn't have worn a wire with me. Kilgrave wouldn't have forced me into a psych evaluation. Kilgrave wouldn't have made me talk about this. It's not bothering me. And Kilgrave would've understood that.

But unfortunately, his kneecap was shattered. I saw actual tears in Kilgrave's eyes. And I was loving it. His crying between bass drops was a nice touch. The cell was soundproof for everyone's safety. Kilgrave couldn't be heard by anyone that wasn't protected. Too much of a risk of being controlled. And with everyone having headphones on, it's not like they'd be able to hear him anyway. I threw Kilgrave on the floor, giving him one last swift kick to his ribs.

"What the hell was that for?" he wept.

"You had it coming," I assured, slamming the door to his cell. I told one of the doctors about his injuries and they left to tend to them. I'm sure Jessica has come in here to work him over a time or two, so I probably didn't help matters. But damn, that felt good. Not only did I get my aggressions about Loki out, but anything I had pent up about Kilgrave got out, too. Neat. See? I didn't need a psych evaluation. I just needed to beat the shit out of Kilgrave. Cheaper than therapy.

I went back up to the tower and heard Joe Hisaishi's magical compositions echoing through the halls. By the sounds of it, they just finished Howl's Moving Castle. I went back into my room and threw myself on the bed. An hour later, I heard the door creak open and felt an arm drape around me.

"I'm so sorry, my love," Loki's voice whispered in my ear, "I should have told you about what we were doing. The only reason we worry about you is because we love you. And no one more than I. If I have to spend the rest of my life making it up to you, then so be it. I'll let you sleep now. And if you don't want to get on that flight tomorrow, I understand. Good night, darling. I love you."

I felt Loki press his lips onto my temple and my entire body shivered. I rolled over and curled into his chest, "I love you, too…"

"Does this mean you forgive me?" he asked, hopeful.

"Not completely," I told, "But you're getting there. If you'll excuse me, I have a flight to board early tomorrow morning and I'd like to get some sleep."

"Good night, darling."

"Good night, Loki."

 **A/N: Remember the interference in her phone when they were at the bar? I do. Pepperidge Farm does. I'm sorry. I'm meme loving trash. But everything's a bit rocky right now. Loki's in the doghouse, Kilgrave's in pieces, and we're leaving for the Virgin Islands in the morning. So, I'll see you guys next chapter. xx**


	9. Chapter 9

Hello, 5AM. My one, true nemesis. As much of a morning person that I am, I hated waking up early on a day off. I didn't deserve this. I was a good person. However, I was going to be on a flight to the Virgin Islands in a couple of hours. Worth it.

Although, I did not fancy waking up alone. Again. Because Loki wasn't in the doghouse enough. I got out of bed and jumped in the shower only to find a note on the bathroom door. No signature, but that wasn't Loki's handwriting. His handwriting was a work of art in itself.

 _You'll thank me later._

All it said. I turned the water on and the most beautiful smell in the world stirred up behind me. That was Arabica. Dark roast. Maybe extra dark? Tony Stark, I love you so much. The man installed my shower coffee pot. And set it. And I've been introduced to the world of shower coffee. This needs to be a thing. If this isn't a thing already, it needs to be. I got out, pulled myself together, and went out into the living room with my cup in hand. I didn't find Loki, but instead, I found Bucky watching cartoons.

"Hi, sweetie," I sat with him, "You're up early."

"Last night wasn't my night," Bucky shrugged, "I'm up still."

"When was the last time you slept a solid eight hours?" I worried.

"What's today?"

"Wednesday."

"Monday night maybe?"

"James," I scolded, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm sorry," he apologized. Bucky knew things were bad when I busted out the first name, "You have enough on your plate. You don't need to deal with me on top of that."

"Don't give me that," I snapped, "Are you going to be ok without me for the next week?"

"I'll be fine," Bucky brushed me off, "Quit making excuses. We'll all live without having you to hold us together. We'll manage."

"Speaking of my leaving," I switched tangents, "Have you seen Loki this morning? I woke up and he was nowhere to be found."

"He left with Jessica," he said, "They went down to see that Kilgrave guy. Then, he said he was going to make sure that the car was packed."

"They went on Kilgrave duty?" I rolled my eyes, "Would've been nice if someone would've told me."

"Loki didn't tell you?" Bucky gave me a look, "Odd. I thought he would've said something to you."

"Not a word," I rested my head on his metal shoulder, "I'm going to miss it around here, Bucky. I missed it when I was with Kilgrave and I'll miss it when I'm with Loki, laying out on the beach in the Virgin Islands."

"And we'll miss you," he cradled me against his chest, "I'm sure we'll end up with a postcard saying how much you wish we were there, but really and truly, kid. We'll be alright."

"Promise?"

"I promise," Bucky assured me, "Go and enjoy yourself. God knows you deserve it. No one works harder around here than you."

"Thanks, Bucky," I smiled. I was really going to miss the tower. I had just come home and here I am, leaving again.

"Hey," Bucky ran his natural thumb over my cheekbone, "I know I'm a good shoulder to cry on, but try not crying on this one. I don't want it to rust."

"Sorry," I giggled a little, "And if Tony tries sticking refrigerator magnets on you again, you have my full permission to clock him."

"Thanks," Bucky held me tight, "I've been itching to backhand Stark lately. His old man wasn't much different. I only met Howard a handful of times, but I can tell where Tony gets it from."

"Honey," a voice chimed from the front door, "I'm home. And I might need stitches."

"Jess," I got up from the couch and looked over her bleeding knuckles, "What did you do?"

"I think his teeth got caught on my fist," she winced, "The son of a bitch bit me. He didn't have as much fight in him today as what he usually does. It was almost kind of disappointing."

"Here," I grabbed the first aid kit and started cleaning Jessica's knuckles, "I got it." 

"You're so motherly, darling," Loki complimented, draping his arms around my shoulders, "Maybe you and I could try for offspring of our own while we're away."

"Yeah," I scoffed, "Because baby proofing Avenger Tower would be such an easy feat."

"Who said anything about us living in the tower?"

"No," I reminded, "That was one of the terms of your probation. You live in the tower where Fury can keep an eye on you and if you get out of hand, he's got the Avengers at his disposal. Besides, I couldn't do babies now. That's too far down the road yet."

"Alright," Loki nuzzled his face between my neck and my shoulder while I stitched up Jessica's hand, "No babies yet."

"Marry me first," I cracked a smile, unspooling a length of ace bandage, "And we'll talk."

"Will you?" Loki asked.

"No," I tied Jessica off, "I don't accept that. If you're going to propose to me, Loki, I want to be floored. And then, I want to be swept off my feet like a damn Disney princess."

"A Disney princess?" Jessica gave me a look, "Really?"

"Yes," I stood my ground, "I want to be Belle for a day, dammit!"

"Belle?" Loki wondered, "Which one is that?"

"The bookworm," I refreshed his memory. I forgot that we had only watched _Beauty and the Beast_ once. And Loki fell in love with her because she reminded him so much of me, "The one that loved the Beast for exactly who he was."

"Gaston was an asshole in that movie," Jessica chuckled.

"Yet you're making fun of me for wanting to be Belle?" I teased.

"You act like I didn't have a childhood," she squeaked, "Not much of one, but I did have one."

"Are you ready, my love?" Loki spun me around, "We do have a flight to catch."

"Yeah," I fell into him, "Bucky? Are you sure you guys will be alright without me?"

"We'll be fine," he practically pushed us out the door, "If all else fails, I'm sure Jessica can crack a few heads."

"It'd be my honor," she accepted the job.

"Call if you need anything," I insisted, "It's like I'm not even off the clock."

"Yes, you are," Bucky assured, "Go. Don't do anything stupid."

"Don't let Tony stick magnets to you," I reminded, "And tell him thank you for me for the coffee pot in my shower."

"You have a coffee pot in your shower?" Jessica chimed, "Lucky…"

"Come on," Loki almost had to drag me out, "We're going to miss our flight again."

"Bye, guys!" I waved behind me.

Loki and I took off for the airport and boarded our plane. Going through airport security with Loki was always an adventure. He always got pulled aside for additional screening. He had to get half naked before going through the metal detector. It was rough.

And turbulence! Loki had been on Earth for three years, flown around the world, and still! He was the biggest baby when it came to turbulence. I had to hold his hand through takeoff and landing every time. Not that I mind. Granted, Loki would be shaking like a leaf in a tornado, but knowing I'm the one to settle him gave me such a warm feeling.

Loki nuzzled his face in my ribs and white knuckled it through our takeoff. I figured if he were close to my boobs, he'd be ok. A couple of times, I could feel him smiling like a fifteen-year-old on prom night. I loved him, but he was such a dork. Wasn't always like that. I remember when he was still the pain in the ass God of Mischief. Yet somehow, I managed to domesticate him. My precious, little angel…with the crooked halo.

As soon as our plane was stable, I started to nod off in his arms. I had been sleeping like shit since I had come back to the tower. Maybe a decent sleep in a vehicle of some sort would do me good. And in Loki's arms. Although I was still kind of pissed at him for thinking it'd be ok to wear a wire, that could be forgiven. All I wanted was us. A nice, little escape from the world.

Until the nice, warm, fuzzy feeling future and the cold, hard, evil past caught up in my subconscious.

I was walking around a penthouse. Empty. Bare walls. No furniture. No one there but me. It was kind of nice. Safe. I looked down at my hand and saw a sparkling diamond on my finger, surrounded by tiny amethyst stones. I know we talked about it in the tower, but did Loki propose to me? I always thought he would've proposed with emeralds, but that's just me.

I wandered into the bedroom where a big, four post, king sized bed stood in the middle of the room. With a pair of handcuffs on one of the posts. I knew that Loki wasn't a stranger to the kinkier things in life, so that wasn't much of a surprise. I felt an arm wrap around my waist and a hand cuffing me to our bed. I couldn't have held back a smile if I wanted to. I felt his lips trailing up my neck.

"Did you really think you could escape me?"

That wasn't Loki.

"No," I whispered to myself. I could already feel the shakes starting.

"That's right," his unsettling voice nestled in my ear, "No matter how hard you try, my dear. You and I will always end up right back here. You'll never escape me. You at my feet, doing my bidding. You on your back, completely helpless. You're like a housecat that actually listens. Well…I say you listen. It's more like you do whatever I tell you. And look who's not here to protect you…"

"He'll come," I assured, my voice shaking, "I know he will."

"Do you really think he loves you?" Kilgrave growled, "Oh, no. He sees you as his glorified babysitter. Nothing more. Nothing less. You're nothing but dead weight to him. He didn't think twice about wearing a wire to run back to the director and tell him everything. You really think he did that out of love? No. He did that because he was ordered to. You're nothing but an obligation. Not even the best of a bad situation. I'm honestly surprised he hasn't offed himself."

"No," I snapped, trying to shake free from the handcuffs, "Loki loves me."

"Does he…?" he smirked, "And by the way, darling. You have quite a punishment coming to you. Did you know that you broke my leg in six different places? Along with my ankle? And two of my ribs? And my nose? And my jaw? Chipped a couple of my teeth? Dislocated my shoulder? Where should we begin?"

"No!" I screamed.

"I'm right here, sweetheart," Loki shook me, snapping me out of my dream, "Talk to me. What happened?"

"Nothing," I brushed him off, steadying my breathing, "I'm fine."

"You scared the hell out of the entire plane," he caught me up, "What was going on in that beautiful head of yours?"

"I'd rather not talk about it," I grumbled, remembering what happened the last time I vented to him.

"Look," Loki undid a couple of his shirt buttons, "No wires. No microphones. No listening devices of any sort. I promise you that I will take it to my grave. Please…"

"Kilgrave," I kept my voice low, "By the sounds of things, you and Jessica paid him a visit this morning."

"Yeah," Loki nodded, "We did. We tried anyway. Medical wouldn't let us see him."

"Really?" I wondered, "Why is that?"

"He had an extensive list of injuries," he explained, "Internal bleeding, a few broken bones. The fact that he's alive is nothing short of a miracle, according to one of the doctors."

"I guess Jessica doesn't know her own strength," I figured.

"No," Loki shook his head, "Jessica said that it wasn't her handiwork. She kept track of everything she had done to Kilgrave. That wasn't from her. Come to think of it, darling, you weren't home for a bit last night. Where did you go?"

"Stress release," I grinned, "I was pretty pissed you had a wire on me. Even more pissed that it was your idea."

"So, you took it out on Kilgrave?"

"Precisely."

"You know," Loki held me close, "I brought sedatives if you need them."

"No," I shot him down, "I don't need pills. I just need a good, strong drink and I'll be fine."

"We'll be landing shortly," he said, "You can have a drink when we get to our hotel."

"Promise?" I made the big, sparkly eyes at him.

"I promise," he vowed, "I've been watching Stark rather closely lately, so I could make something to your liking."

"Loki," I awed, "You know you don't need to do that for me. I'm a big girl. I'm capable of making my own drinks."

"I know you are," he kissed my forehead, "Is it so bad that I'd want to do something nice for you?"

"No," I nuzzled into his ribs.

Our flight finally landed and Loki and I got into our town car on the company dime. Damn. SHIELD knew how to set a girl up. Our room was ridiculous. Beautiful views of the beach. A west facing room. A California king bed. On the table, a beautiful fruit basket was nicely arranged next to the champagne on ice. And a card!

Don't come back pregnant.

Don't attempt to overthrow the country.

Fury

The man definitely had a way with words. The bellhop brought the last of our luggage in and I threw myself on the bed with a piece of pineapple in hand, "So, what do we do now?"

"We're on vacation, my love," Loki laid next to me, "The world is our oyster."

"I don't know about you," I dug through my bag for the black and gold one-piece swimsuit Loki had picked out for me when he and I went shopping, "But I have all intentions of laying in the sun while it's still out. I'd suggest for you to do the same, but I feel like you'd burn to a crisp."

"And why is that?" he asked, taking my pineapple away from me.

"Your Jotun skin is very sensitive," I pointed out, "Do you not remember our first summer together? We went to the beach once and you said you'd never do it again because of how badly sunburned you were?"

"That's right," he cringed at the memory.

"Going through six bottles of aloe in a day is insane," I chuckled, "You should probably stay inside."

"We did bring sunscreen, didn't we?" Loki went through our toiletries.

"Of course," I scoffed, "If you could be a lamb and put some oil on my back, I'd love you forever."

"You'll love me forever regardless," his silver tongue lashed out, "But I'll be a lamb."

"Thank you," I stripped down in the bathroom, slipped my suit on, and laid on the chaise lounge on our balcony. This bright, beautiful sun felt incredible. I usually disappeared when I fell naked in snow, so a little bit of color couldn't hurt. Besides, I had a yellow dress I wanted to get into while we were here and I couldn't do that pale as a ghost.

Not only did this sun feel incredible, but Loki's hands on my back. His bare skin on mine. It had been so long. And at one point, I may have gone cross eyed. He rubbed on my aching muscles while I baked in the Caribbean sun. This. This was all I needed. No worrying about the guys. No worrying about the asshole we had in holding. No worrying about my mother worrying about me…Although…I should probably check in with everyone…

"Loki," I rolled onto my back, "Could you grab my phone for me?"

"Sure," he pulled it off the charger from the nightstand, "What do you need your phone for?"

"Hold on," I scrolled through my contacts.

"Hello?" a voice chimed from the speaker.

"Hi, Mom," I smiled.

"Hi, honey!" she squeaked, "Where are you?"

"St. Thomas," I filled her in, "Loki and I got here a little over an hour ago. We're fine."

"How is it?" she asked, "Beautiful? Scenic? Everything the travel brochure promised?"

"Better," I beamed, "It's breathtaking, Mom."

"Hi, Charlotte," Loki chimed in, putting more tanning oil on me.

"Hi, Loki," Mom giggled, "Good to see you're not alone."

"Of course I'm not," I was confused for a brief moment…then, it all became very clear, "Let me guess. Coulson called you?"

"No," she lied, "Why would Phil be calling me? He only does that after you come back from a mission."

"Had a pretty serious one yesterday," I caught her up, "I had the privilege of washing Lola."

"You lucky girl!" Mom squealed, "Was it a religious experience?"

"Oh, yeah," I nodded, biting the inside of my cheek to keep myself from moaning. Loki's hands were hitting spots that I didn't even know I had, "Being here is a little bit of a religious experience, too."

"You're welcome," Loki whispered to me, making sure my mother couldn't hear him.

"So, what's the plan for tonight?" Mom asked.

"I don't know," I looked over at my rather mischievous boyfriend, "What are we doing tonight?"

"We have dinner reservations for eight o'clock," he told, "And you shouldn't be in this sun in another hour or so. I don't want you to burn either."

"He really does take good care of you, doesn't he?" I could hear a smug, little grin in her voice.

"We're not getting married yet, Mother," I grumbled, "I just called to check in. I should probably call the others, too."

"You have a list?" she scoffed.

"Yes," I rolled my eyes, "I have to call the kids to let them know Mommy and Daddy are in one piece."

"And you say you're not getting married yet…"

"Mother!" I growled.

"I'm sorry," she sighed, "I meddle. I'm nosy. You'll be the same way one day. I'm almost positive. Go call the children."

"Thank you," I relaxed, "I'll call you in a few days, ok?"

"Ok, baby!" she chirped, "Love you!"

"Love you, too," I hung up my phone and dropped it on the floor of our balcony.

"Well, my dear," Loki made himself comfortable, laying on top of me, "Are you going to call home now?"

"No," I admitted, "As much as I love my mother, she's exhausting."

"That she is," he agreed, "You're sufficiently oiled. Hopefully, you won't burn. I'm going to check in back home, if that's alright with you."

"That's fine," I stretched out as Loki got off me, "Send them my love and if you talk to Fury, tell him he's a regular Shakespeare."

"How dare you!" Loki gasped, so offended. If I didn't know any better, I'd think I had just shot his dog and insulted his mother in the same breath, "Shakespeare was brilliant! Fury singlehandedly murders the English language every time he opens his mouth!"

"Easy, sailor," I settled him, "That was sarcasm."

"Oh," he shrugged, picking my phone up, "I'll be back."

"Hey," I stopped him, "You're not going to do something like tell Fury my every move, are you?"

"No," he assured, kissing my forehead, "I made you a promise on the plane that I'd take it to my grave and I don't plan on going back on that promise. If it were to anyone else, I probably would, but it's you."

"Thank you," I pulled his face down to mine and gave him a proper kiss, "I love you, Loki."

"I love you, too."

And just like that, I was left to catch a better tan while Loki touched base back home. Minus the occasional intrusion, I had a feeling that this vacation was going to be one of the best I've ever had. Beautiful location. Beautiful demigod by my side. What could possibly go wrong? Nothing. That's what.

 **A/N: Other than the Kilgrave dream screwing everything up, I'd say this is a warm, fluffy chapter in the books. But! *Professor Farnsworth voice* Good news, everyone! I HIT 50,000 COLLECTIVE VIEWS WORLDWIDE TODAY! It's amazing how far I've come since this past August. The friendships I've formed. The improvement in my storytelling. I'm finally comfortable writing smut! In fact, this one might have a little something, something in the next chapter or so. To those of you that have stuck around…Thank you, gracias, danke, hvala ti, děkuji, tak, merci, grazie,** **ありがとう** **, Спасибо.**

 **And if I don't have your language here or I done goofed on the translations, I'm sorry. But seriously. Thank you all. All 50,000 of you. As always, I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Quick trigger warning. Implied attempted rape.**

I had such a beautiful glow. Not quite a post sex glow, but a sun kissed glow. Enough to put that yellow dress on without looking disgustingly pale. I went back inside to the delightful air conditioning and still no Loki. I was starting to think he thought of me as some sort of disease. He did say he had something to take care of, but I thought I was what he was supposed to be taking care of. And I know Loki said he would call home, but it couldn't hurt to hear from them myself.

"Stark Laboratories," a voice answered.

"Hello, JARVIS," I smiled, "Do you think you could put Tony on for me please?"

"Yes, Miss. Please hold."

I loved JARVIS. Tony treated him like shit sometimes, but without him, Tony would fall apart. I know it. He doesn't appreciate him enough.

"Yeah?" Speak of the devil.

"Hi, Tony," I chirped.

"Hey, kid," I heard machines running in the background, "What's up? How's paradise?"

"It's paradise," I shrugged, "That's for sure. Whose idea was the fruit basket and the champagne?"

"I know what you're thinking," Tony said, "It wasn't me. Check the nightstand drawer. That was me."

I rolled over and opened the drawer in the nightstand. A small, black box sat comfortably tucked in the corner closest to the bed. I couldn't help but roll my eyes, "Nice, Tony. Very nice."

"Safety first," he justified, "Fury said he didn't want you getting pregnant. And the walls in the tower aren't as thick as you think they are."

"Hold on," I studied the box a little closer, "Tony, how did you know what kind to get?"

"I have my sources."

"Only two people in the tower have seen Loki fully naked," I pointed out, "I know I didn't tell you and you don't have the balls to ask Thor."

"I have my sources," he repeated himself, "And I also know that you sing swing in the showers after you're done training."

"Note to self," I cringed, "Don't use the showers in the training room anymore."

"There's also some kinky things in the closet," Tony added, "In case you're looking to add some sprinkles."

Terrified and cautious, I opened up the closet. Leather masks? A swing? Whips, cattle prods, ball gags, blindfolds. And all meticulously organized, "Jesus Christ, Tony! What kind of freaks do you think we are?"

"Adventurous?"

"Are you ready, my love?" Loki snuck up behind me, nuzzling his face in my shoulder, "Who's on the phone?"

"Go get 'em, mistress," Tony teased.

"It's Stark," I grumbled, "And there will be no going or getting. There will be no mistress. I love you, Tony, but some days, you make me nauseous."

"What did he do?" Loki worried.

"Nothing," I assured, "Don't worry about it."

"Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics," Tony advised.

"Bite me, Tony."

"Don't tempt me."

Click.

"Loki," I threw myself on the bed, "I'm starving."

"Let's get you something to eat then," he suggested, dismissing the disgusting things Tony said to me, "I'll put our luggage in the closet."

"No!" I screeched in pure horror, "Don't go in the closet!"

"Alright," Loki let the handle go, "Why shouldn't I go in the closet?"

"Tony left us a present," I grumbled into the pillows.

"Really?" Loki perked up, "Stark's the last person I'd expect to be giving us presents."

"Just for the love of God," I begged, "Don't go in the closet."

"I won't," he promised, "Now, let's go get dinner."

"Ok," I gave Loki my hand and he pulled me onto my feet.

It always made me nervous when Loki took me for dinner. I'd never know if it was going to be a quick trip to Chipotle like I'd want or a four-star restaurant like he'd want. And he could never tell me which we'd be going to! Because heaven forbid if I'm kept in the loop.

Not four star, but it was nice. An outdoor setting on the beach. For the first night here, it couldn't have been more perfect. I ordered a huge margarita right off the bat. I wasn't driving and I'm on vacation. No one could judge me unless their name was Judy or Jesus.

"You're awfully quiet tonight, darling," Loki noticed, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," I assured, "I'm quiet because of my mouthful of shrimp. These things are huge!"

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," he smiled, "After what you've been through and dealing with everything and everyone else, you deserve it."

"In that case," I flagged down our waiter, "Could I get another margarita here?"

"I don't want you drinking yourself stupid," Loki begged, "Because then, I'll have to take care of you in the morning and I already have plans for then."

"Oh?" I sipped on my drink, "Care to let me in on those plans?"

"I think you and I will go on an adventure," he thought, "If that's alright with you."

"What kind of adventure?" I wondered, "Land or sea?"

"We'll start on land," Loki decided, "Maybe we'll move toward sea."

"I approve," I smiled, "That sounds like a capital idea. I won't get drunk tonight, but we do still have that bottle of champagne in the room yet. And I don't know about you, but I'd like to take a stab at it once we get back."

I missed this. I missed Loki and me being us. I missed our dinners together. Our quiet nights. Our not so quiet nights. I don't know why I haven't asked Fury for time off before. I had thought of taking vacations with Loki for a good, solid year now. It was nice to get out of the tower and away from everything and everyone on my own terms.

As soon as we got back to the room, I felt Loki's icy fingers on my shoulder blades. It caught me off guard, but I was loving it. Loki's massages were a thing of legend. They made my body go numb, yet I felt like I was on pins and needles the whole time. He laid me down on the bed for easier access.

Before I knew it, Loki had his lips just below my ear. In the two years we had been together, that little shit had my spots figured out. He knew not only where all of my buttons were, but he knew the exact order to push them in for maximum results. And he was getting there. His hands kept working on my back while his mouth was sucking on my neck. I bit down hard on my bottom lip, suppressing a moan.

And Loki knew it, "Getting a bit hot and bothered, my love?"

"No," I lied.

"Do you know how much I missed this?" Loki confessed, digging his thumbs into my muscles a little deeper, "Just you and me?"

"I know," I agreed, "I missed it, too, baby."

Loki sat me up and started peeling my dress off, "What did you miss the most?"

I laid in Loki's arms, half naked, undoing the buttons on his shirt, "This. My skin on yours. We almost match."

"If you wouldn't have insisted on laying in the sun," he teased, throwing his shirt off to the side, "We would match."

"I'm sorry," I giggled, nuzzling into his chest, "I like to feel the sun on occasion."

"Well," a devious smirk graced the face of my beautiful demigod, "Since you missed our skin on skin contact so much, maybe I should indulge you."

"Maybe you should," I traced my finger on the gorgeously chiseled marble Loki hid from everyone but me. I needed to go nine rounds with him again. Loki's hands went from my back to my ass in little to no time flat and his lips pushed firmly against mine.

"Oh, the things I'd like to do to you, darling," Loki whispered in my ear, "Where shall we begin?"

No.

No, no, no.

Not here...

Not now...

My mind went back in time about a month. I was in a short, white dress, sitting at a bar in Hell's Kitchen. I caught a man's eye and I immediately became a sweet, boring secretary from Staten Island. The man took me back to his penthouse and threw me on the bed.

He tore my white dress to shreds and shackled my arms and legs to the bed. I could still hear him screaming in my head.

"That's right, you little slut," he'd yell, "Be a good, little girl for me. Oh, the things I have planned for you, darling...Where do we start?"

Like a reflex, I pushed Loki off of me and sprinted toward the bathroom. Violently, I started throwing up and hyperventilating. I sat in the bathtub, putting my head between my knees, rocking back and forth, trying to bring myself down. I would be ok. I would be ok...

"Are you alright?" Loki knocked on the door.

"I'll be fine," I could hardly get the words out. Like a switch, I started bawling in the bathtub. I just wanted this to be over. I wanted my head on straight and for life to go back to the way it was before. I was too wrapped up in myself to even notice the pair of arms wrapped around me.

"Now, I'm going to ask you again," Loki held me against his chest, "And I want you to answer me honestly. I promise that it's only you and me here. No wires. No listening devices. No recording devices. You and me…Is everything ok?"

I couldn't even speak. Loki's worry just made me cry harder. All I did was shake my head.

"I thought so," he cradled me gently, "Will you please promise me that you'll see someone when we get home?"

I nodded. This was getting ridiculous. I wanted Kilgrave out of my head and I wanted it now. I hated admitting when Fury was right, but he was right. I did need to see a doctor.

"Let's just go to bed, ok?" Loki suggested, wiping my cheeks, "Do you want something to help you sleep?"

I shook my head. I didn't need pills. The tequila was kicking my ass already. Loki carried me out of the bathtub and into bed. I cuddled back into his chest, "I'm sorry for being such a screw up."

"You're not a screw up, sweetheart," Loki assured, stroking my hair, "You're sick. There's a difference. He can't get you here. He won't get you here."

"I know," I cranked my neck back, "How do you know that?"

"I talked to Clint before we left," Loki said, "He told me your mantra."

"I'm still amazed you two can be in the same room," I shrugged.

"We got through it," Loki kissed my forehead, "You will, too. Say it."

"He can't get me here," I sighed, "He won't get me here."

"That's my girl," he brushed the hair out of my eyes, "Try to get some sleep. We have a wonderful day planned tomorrow."

"Ok," I pulled the blankets over us, "Good night, Loki."

"Good night, darling," he gave me a quick kiss, "I love you."

"I love you, too," I choked out, slowly closing my eyes.

"Hey," he picked my chin up, "I promise you that everything will be ok. And if it's not, I'll do everything and anything in my power to make it so."

Thank you, Loki...My saving grace. My angel with the crooked halo. I didn't need pills to help me sleep. I just needed him. His warm embrace, despite his anatomical makeup. The beautiful rhythm his heart kept. And the reassurance that kept me moving forward.

For the first time since I had been back from that damn mission, I woke up without my heart racing and attempting to shake off a nightmare. I also still had Loki holding me tight like he was afraid someone was going to take me away from him. I looked up at his perfect face and those piercing green eyes staring back at me.

"Good morning," Loki gave me a kiss, "Sleep well?"

"Like a rock," I half chuckled in shock.

"No nightmares?" he worried.

"No," I smiled, "No nightmares. Radio static up here all night."

"Good," Loki snuggled me a little longer, "While you were sleeping, room service brought breakfast. Do you want any?"

"Sure," I could smell espresso, "Think we could start with coffee first?"

"Of course," he already had a cup for me on his side's nightstand, "I know you, my love. I know you very well."

"Well enough to know how I like my coffee?" I took a drink. And had half an orgasm, "Yes. Yes, you do."

"Told you," Loki pressed his lips against my temple.

"Now, let me go," I asked nicely, "I have to pee and I need a shower."

"And you're taking your coffee cup with you?" Loki gave me a look.

"What can I say?" I started walking toward the bathroom, "I've had Pandora's box of shower coffee opened up for me. You can thank one Anthony Howard Stark for that, if you're looking to point fingers."

"I usually blame Stark for everything anyway," Loki teased, "I'm going to step outside and make a phone call while you're in the shower, alright?"

"That's fine!" I yelled from the bathroom, "If you're calling home, send everyone my love."

"I will!" Loki shut the sliding glass door to our balcony behind him and I turned on the water. Granted, it didn't have my shower's water pressure or the coffee pot, but I could make do for a week. I was more surprised that I wasn't having a breakdown in the shower again. The first time post Kilgrave that I was in here longer than five minutes. I kind of missed it.

I got out of the shower and got a decent look at what room service had brought for breakfast. I had never seen so much beautifully prepared fruit in one place before. I wonder if I could get them to make a mural of my face in kiwi…

"Yes," I could hear Loki on the phone through the crack in our balcony door, "She's doing better. Marginally, but these things take time…I know. I'm actually nervous. I wasn't this nervous when I had the wire…Yes. Thank you, Thor. You're such a help…I'm sorry. This has me on edge."

Huh…A part of me wanted to eavesdrop a little more, but instead, I opened the door and nestled my face in Loki's back, "Who you talking to?"

"Oh," I caught him by surprise, "It's Thor. How long have you been standing there?"

I yanked his phone from his hand, "Hi, Thor."

"My lady," Thor greeted me, "How are you?"

"Better," I tried not to repeat Loki's words, "Slowly, but surely. How are things back home?"

"Everything's fine," he assured, "Lady Jessica is keeping everyone in line as well as you would."

"Kind of figured," I smiled.

"She would make a fine warrior," Thor praised, "Although, her use of threats makes me nervous."

"And Kilgrave?" I wondered, "How are things on that front?"

"No," Loki scolded, taking his phone back, "You don't need to worry yourself about him. He's nothing. Thor, I swear if you tell her anything…That's what I thought."

"Don't let Loki bully you, Thor," I took his phone back, "He's just watching out for me."

"Need I remind you of last night?" Loki pointed out.

"If I could forget last night ever happened," I growled, "I would."

"What happened?" Thor wondered, "If you don't mind me asking."

"I do," I shot him down, "I'm sorry, sweetie, but I'd really rather not talk about it."

"Alright," he let it go, "Go engage in merriment, my lady. We will anxiously await your return."

"I miss you guys, too," I returned to my previous elated state, "We'll be home soon."

Loki took his phone back, "I'll call later…Bye."

"What are you calling later for?" I asked, cuddling into my boyfriend.

"You needn't concern yourself with it for now," Loki kissed my cheek, "Come along. We were told to engage in merriment."

"And since when do you listen to your brother?" I smirked, "I thought you did what you wanted."

"In this case, he's right," Loki mirrored me, "I'm afraid my silver tongue is rubbing off on you, my love."

"Let's go!"

And that's how our day began. Loki and I went down to the beach and had the most innocent day. My tan darkened and his skin turned bright red in a matter of two hours. However, when normal people build sandcastles, they usually use a bucket, but God knows we're far from normal. Loki broke out his magic and made a sand fortress. A livable, full sized, damn near the size of a small house, sand fortress.

All of the little kids were playing in it and begging Loki to do more. It warmed my little heart to no end to see my man interacting with children. Mom and I were on the same page when it came to guys and babies. Nothing sexier than a man being good with kids. And definitely nothing sexier than my demigod with babies.

When the sun began to set, Loki and I retired to the lovely line of hammocks on the beach in the hotel's courtyard. This had become a favorite spot since we got here. I could feel the breeze rolling off the ocean between my toes and Loki beneath me. It couldn't have been better. This was my idea of paradise.

"You know, my dearest," Loki swung with me, "I don't think there's anyone in all nine realms that I love more than you."

"You don't have to sweet talk me anymore, Loki," I blushed, "We've been together for two years already. I'm not going anywhere."

"Almost three," he corrected, "And it's not sweet talk. It's just fact…Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"

"Are you really?" I smiled, "You're using the greatest pick up line ever on me?"

"Can I finish?" he scolded lightly.

"Yes," I nuzzled into his ribs, "Please go on."

One of the little things I missed horribly. I loved hearing Loki recite Shakespeare to me. I knew how much he loved to do it. It was one of the first things I introduced him to when he began his exile here. I didn't expect him to take to it like a duck to water. And he knew I had a weakness for Sonnet 18. And combined with the sound of his voice, it was very swoon worthy.

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?" Loki started over, "Thou art more lovely and more temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May. And summer's lease hath all too short a date. Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines. And often is his gold complexion dimmed. And every fair from fair sometime declines. By chance, or by nature's changing course, untrimmed. But thy eternal summer shall not fade. Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st. Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade. When eternal lines to time thou grow'st. So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see. So long lives this and gives life to thee..."

"I love you," I stretched up, kissing Loki ever so softly.

"And I love you," he smiled, "You're the best thing that could've happened to me after...Well..."

"Hey," I put my hand to his cheek, "I don't mention your tortured past. You don't mention mine. That's always been the way we've worked. What you did was the result of vicious beatings and a power hungry asshole. I guess I can kind of relate, but don't start beating yourself up."

"Really and truly, though," he brought it back, "I do love you. More than I could ever express to you. So, I got you a little something. A token of my love for you."

"Oh?" I cocked my head, "Do tell, baby."

"You did say you wanted to be floored," Loki recalled, digging in his pocket, "But I figured you wouldn't want a scene. Just you and me."

"What are you talking about?" I giggled, watching his hand take a small, blue box from his pocket.

"Open it," he handed it to me.

"Wow," I followed orders, taking the lid off. A sparkling emerald set in silver shined in my eyes, "Loki, this is beautiful."

"Don't put it on, though," he stopped me, taking the ring out of my hand, "You have to answer a question first..."

"Oh my God..." my heart stopped and my mind began to race. Was he about to do what I think he was about to do?

"All you have to do is answer it correctly," Loki stipulated, taking my left hand, "For my beautiful girlfriend, my best friend, my guiding light, my soulmate, will you marry me...?"

I didn't know what to say. My entire brain went numb. Until my negativity managed to find a way to ruin it.

"You're not asking me out of pity, are you?" I couldn't even bring myself to look at him.

"Of course not," he assured, bringing my lips to his, "I love you. Regardless of what happened. And I want to spend my eternity with you. Is that too much to ask?"

"In that case," a smile stretched across my face as I wiggled my finger into the ring, "Duh. Like I'm going to start saying no to you now. Yes, Loki. A million times over."

"Are you sufficiently floored, darling?" he asked, putting the box back in his pocket.

"I believe I asked for Disney princess treatment," I reminded.

"Look on the inside of your ring."

Sure. I just put the ring on and now, he has me taking it off. But for a perfectly good reason. I looked at the engraving on the inside of the band.

 _Tale as old as time…_

I swallowed the lump in the back of my throat. Just when I think Loki couldn't catch me off guard any more today, he goes and does that. If sex didn't leave such a bad feeling in the pit o my stomach right now, Loki would definitely be getting laid tonight.

"I guess I really was getting Disney princess treatment," I wiped my eyes.

"You loved the monster when no one else would," Loki held me, "You really are Belle, aren't you?"

"I'm not French…" I had to keep myself from crying. I refused to have another breakdown while we were here, "Who else knew about this?"

"Thor," Loki said, "That's it. We'll make the announcement when we get back."

"You didn't tell my mother, did you?" I worried, "Something like this might give her a heart attack."

"No," Loki settled me, "I thought you'd want to tell her that. Which is why when we leave, we're flying into Rochester, instead of JFK."

"That's fine," I just wish he would've told me before we left the tower. I was too high on excitement and possibly hypnotized by the emerald on my finger. I couldn't have been happier. I was about to spend the rest of my life with the demigod I loved. Nothing was going to ruin this for me.

 **A/N: I can't tell you how happy this chapter makes me. Especially that last part. And if you're looking to enhance your experience, there's a video on YouTube of Tom Hiddleston reading Shakespeare's Sonnet 18. Just make sure you're mentally prepared for it. It's beautiful and I've spent many a night, falling asleep to Sonnet 18 on a loop. So, leave favorite parts/lines/what have you in the reviews and I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	11. Chapter 11

I started thinking that this island may be magic. Nights got easier. Kilgrave flashbacks were becoming a rarity. If this is what vacation was like, I never wanted to go back. Although, I had people back home that count on me. And I missed them horribly.

"Good morning, gorgeous," Loki rested his hand on my face, running his thumb over my cheek.

"Good morning," I curled into his chest, "Someone's awfully affectionate this morning."

"I am always affectionate with you," Loki lifted up my t-shirt, his kisses trailing up my ribs, "Call it celebration."

"For what, baby?" my fingers entangled themselves in his hair.

"You're quiet…"

"I'm not sure how to take that, Loki," I gave him a look, "It almost sounds like an insult."

"Far from it," he nuzzled his face in my boob. For his sake, I hoped he didn't suffocate, "Ever since you've been back from your mission, you've been screaming and crying in your sleep. These past few nights, you haven't said a word. A couple of moans, but that's it."

"Oh," I blushed, "Disregard the moans."

"Naughty dreams, my love?" Loki's kisses started up again, inching down to my bellybutton, "It's been a while since you and I were carnal. Maybe your subconscious is trying to tell you something."

"I don't think I'm quite ready for that," I couldn't look at him. I knew that if he wasn't getting the milk from the reliable cow, he'd look for it elsewhere, "I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for, darling?" Loki sat up next to me, "I don't blame you. Kilgrave ruined my innocent little flower and I promise you. I will get my decent punch in. Until then, our hands are tied."

"And not in the fun way," I cuddled into the beautiful marble Loki called his body, "I've already gotten mine in. But I could definitely stand another few of them."

"You practically crippled the man."

"Still got off easy."

"I know," Loki held me tight, "How about this? You go take care of yourself. We'll take off tomorrow morning."

"And we're flying into Rochester?" I clarified.

"Yes," he nodded, "Are you prepared to see your mother…?"

"Yeah," I winced, "I was hoping you were going to do most of the talking."

"My silver tongue can work miracles," Loki chuckled, "But your mother is definitely a challenge."

"And you're always up for a challenge," I traced my finger on Loki's muscles, "aren't you?"

"Still with you, aren't I?" he kissed the top of my head.

"I'm going to go have a strange man rub all over my body," I teased, "I'll be back later."

"Enjoy yourself, my love," Loki pinched my ass, "Remember who you come back to…"

"If I was going to cheat on you," I sighed, "I wouldn't have said yes to you. Now, get over your insecurities before I get back and we'll enjoy our last night in paradise properly."

"Is that a promise…?" There he was. There was my beloved God of Mischief.

"It's an almost certainty," I kissed his cheek and went out the door to the resort spa. I couldn't believe Loki set this up for me. Fury may have called him a pain in the ass and occasionally, he was, but some days, he really pulled through for me. Such a shame the rest of the Avengers couldn't see Loki the way I do.

I got to the front counter and was given a plush robe and an ice cold cup of green tea. I was tasting a hint of jasmine in it. Yum. This was necessary. This was very necessary. I made myself comfortable on the massage table, dropping the top half of my robe, and waited for someone to pay attention to me.

"Hello," a deep, velvety voice broke the silence. And my heart.

"Hello," my pulse skyrocketed.

"My name is Antoine," he introduced himself, "Anywhere in particular you'd like me to work on?"

"No," I did all I could to keep myself from swooning. And that was just because of Antoine's ethereal voice. It terrified the hell out of me to think of what his hands would…

Oh, my…

I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from moaning. I could almost taste blood. He was amazing. Almost better than Loki. Not quite, but almost. Sweet baby Jesus, this was incredible.

"SHIELD agent, huh?" Antoine guessed.

My stomach dropped. How did a civilian know about an allegedly secret government organization like that? "Um…"

"Don't worry," Antoine settled me, "You're not the first SHIELD agent I've had in here. She had the same tension you do. You probably know her. Melinda."

"Is that May's first name?" I thought out loud, "I always thought her and Coulson shared a first name of Agent."

"Your shoulders and your neck feel just like hers," Antoine said, pushing harder into my shoulder blades, "And it's not every day you have Loki, the God of Mischief and destroyer of New York, come in to make the appointment."

"He's not that anymore," I assured, "He's definitely changed since the Battle of New York. He's a good man."

"He seemed different," he agreed, "Like he's settled down."

"I'm pretty sure he's done just that," I smiled, looking at the sparkling emerald on my finger. And feeling some sort of vibration on my thigh, "Hold on. I need to get that. Do you mind?"

"Not at all," Antoine allowed, "Go ahead. You want me to step out?"

"If that's alright," I dug my phone out of my robe pocket. 

"Knock when I can come back," he slipped out.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hi, baby!" my mother chirped on the other end, "How are you?"

"Hi, Mom," I shook my head, "I'm super. How are you?"

"Good, good," she said, "What are you doing right now?"

"You caught me in the middle of a massage," I grumbled.

"Lucky you," she envied, "When are you coming back? I miss you."

"Tonight's our last night here," I told, "I actually have a surprise for you."

"For me?" Mom chirped, "What kind of surprise?"

"Well," I braced myself, "Loki and I aren't flying into JFK. We'll be in Rochester instead."

"You're coming home?!" she squealed.

"Yeah," I still had the ringing in my ear, "Thought we could come see you. God knows I have plenty of time off."

"I can't wait!" she started to come down, "I wish you could move back here. I don't even know where you live now."

"Classified," I reminded, "Sorry, Mom. I really do hope you could see where I live one day. It's incredible."

"I'm really glad you're coming home, baby," Mom sighed, a smile in her voice, "I have some things to talk to you about. And it'd be better if they were said in person."

"Is everything ok?" I worried.

"I'm fine," she assured, "I'm not dying. It's serious, but not that serious."

"Ok," I relaxed, "We should be flying in around four."

"Have I mentioned how excited I am for you to come home?" Mom sang.

"Three times now, Mom."

"It's been months!" she scolded, "I worry about you constantly! All I get is the occasional phone call and more often than not, you're either exhausted and fresh off a mission or you're drunk!"

"I'm sorry, Mom," I apologized, feeling the guilt deep within my soul.

"I ought to take you over my knee, young lady."

"I'm an adult, Mother."

"And?" she went on, "I know the hours suck, but the least you can do is give me a little peace of mind. That's all I ask."

"I know," I rested my face in the cradle, "I'll try to keep you better informed. But you want some peace of mind? Talk to Loki. He will make sure nothing bad happens to me."

"Promises, promises," she teased, "I have to go, honey. I'll see you tomorrow."

"I love you, Mom."

"Love you, too."

Click.

Some days, she's completely insane, but others, it's really nice to hear her voice.

I knocked on the door and finished up with Antoine. I felt like jelly, but all I wanted was a nap. I wanted to put my swimsuit back on, oil up, and lay in the sun, but unfortunately, the sun was already setting. As soon as I got back to the room, it was covered in rose petals.

Loki.

Sometimes I wonder if he things I'm a walking cliché. I had to admit, though. This was sweet. A dozen big, white, beautiful calla lilies and a note were left on the bed:

 _To my eternal summer's day,_

 _There is a dress in the closet._

 _The shoes are on the floor._

 _Whenever you're ready, I'm waiting in the restaurant._

 _All my love,_

 _Loki._

I loved this man. If I could even call him that. I opened the terrifying closet (that, by the looks of it, had been cleaned out of all the S&M gear) and pulled out a dark green, floor length dress with a slit up the side. Of course we'd match. I pulled myself together and started heading for the restaurant.

"Mrs. Laufeyson," the hostess greeted me, "Your husband is waiting for you."

My heart skipped a beat. Loki, you little shit...Engaged for three days and he's already calling himself my husband. I guess I'd have to get used to hearing that now. I liked the sounds of it. Mrs. Laufeyson…Agent Laufeyson…I was starting to swoon like a schoolgirl.

"Hello, darling," his voice shook me to my core, "Champagne or wine?"

"Wine," I smiled, sitting across from him, "What is all this?"

"It's our last night," he reminded, "I wanted it to be special."

"Kind of hard to top our engagement," I said, "But you can try."

"When have I ever disappointed you, my love?" Loki played with my fingers.

"You haven't," I took his hand, "And I don't think you ever will."

"It's still early in the evening, my love," he smirked, "Give me time."

"I really should start carrying a spray bottle around for you," I rolled my eyes, "Shouldn't I?" 

"There's always the backpack leash," Loki reminded, "That's an option."

"Yeah," I scoffed, "So you can associate being in trouble with getting horny. That's counterproductive, baby. Can't have that."

"Heaven forbid if I like a little pain with my pleasure," Loki smiled.

"By the way," I chirped, "Thank you for cleaning out the closet."

"I understand," he nodded, "Such a shame, though. We could've used that swing."

"Loki!"

"Only joking, love," Loki settled me, "I know you don't do suspension."

That was a lie. I had my own restricted area in the training room. It was nothing but high ceilings and bungee cables. It was my favorite way to unwind at the end of the day. I throw some music on and jump from every high point in the room, flipping through the air. But I kept it to myself.

Only one person knew about the restricted area in the training room and that's because he had to put the addition on. And I knew he wouldn't tell anyone. I had specific requests for the room. Big. Open. Surround sound. No cameras. Fingerprint access only. I wanted this kept under wraps to the best of Tony's ability.

It would only come off as a weakness. Gracefulness and aerial acrobatics never made a good SHIELD agent. Although, my agility came in handy when I was kicking ass. And the parkour skills, too. No one knew where it came from, though. Not even him.

"Really though, Loki," I sipped on my wine, "Thank you. Ever since I've been back, you've been more accommodating than I could have ever asked for."

"No need to thank me, darling," he assured, "I love you. It's my absolute pleasure."

"I love you, too," I blushed.

"There it is," Loki poked at my face, "There's that little bit of color that brings your face alive."

"Do you mind?" I giggled, shaking him off me.

In all honesty, I didn't want him to stop. I craved such innocence. Such normalcy. Loki and I being huge dorks and not giving a shit about who saw. This island was magical and it was going to suck something fierce when we take off.

For more than the obvious reason. Loki sat next to me, clinging to my arm, shaking like a dog finding out he's getting fixed. I don't think Loki and turbulence will ever get along. Whether we were going on missions half way across the world or across the country, my poor baby will never get used to flying.

"Loki," I held him close against my chest, "It'll be fine. I promise you. We're not going to crash. The plane isn't going to drop out of the sky. We'll be alright."

"I know," he pouted, "I know we'll be fine. Doesn't make it any less terrifying."

"Hey," I soothed, "You want me to get you a drink? I'm sure there's bourbon somewhere on this plane."

"I'll be fine," Loki's voice went up an octave, his shaking getting worse. 

"It's kind of nice," I chuckled, "Me taking care of you for a change."

"I don't need to be taken care of," he rolled his eyes, trying to stay all high and mighty, "How are you?" 

"Fine," I said, "Why?"

"Really," he reiterated, "How are you?" 

"Honestly?" I nestled my face in his neck, "Terrified."

"Are you alright?" Loki went into instant panic.

"It's for all the right reasons," I settled, "We're about to announce our engagement to my spastic, easily excited mother who has been wanting us to get married damn near since day one."

"She has?" Loki gave me a look.

"Since the day I brought you home," I told, "My mother has adored you. She wants us to get married in the worst way. Mostly because she was worried I'd end up alone with six cats and a serious addiction to knitting."

"Then, I came along and ruined that," he kissed the top of my head, "I'm terribly sorry."

"Apology accepted," I cuddled, "I'll take you over becoming a lonely spinster with six cats any day of the week, baby."

"Good," Loki squeezed me tight, "Because that would mean I'd have to take your ring back and quite frankly, sweetheart, I'd rather not do that."

"Tale as old as time, right?"

"Conte vieuz comme le monde."

"Since when do you speak French?" I wondered.

"My silver tongue knows many languages," he reminded, "French just happens to be one of them. Would you like your ring inscription in something else? Latin, perhaps? Spanish? Italian? Mandarin? Portuguese?"

"Alright, show off," I stopped him, "I get it. Unless you're going to start spewing ancient Asgardian, I don't want to hear it."

"Would you like me to spew ancient Asgardian?" Loki smirked, "I can do that, too."

"I swear to God," I pounded my head into his chest, "I should open the door and push you out without a parachute."

"And endanger the lives of everyone on this plane?"

"Shut up," I shook my head, smacking him in the shoulder.

The plane finally landed in Rochester and I had fingerprint bruises from Loki's hands on my bicep. I was horrified to see my mother. Granted, I was happy as a clam, but there was no telling how she was going to react to this. But she had something to tell me, too. Maybe I could deflect to her.

"Mom?" I knocked on her front door, "Mom, I'm home!"

My mother screeched at the top of my lungs and threw her arms around me, trying her damnedest to snap my spine in half, "I MISSED YOU!"

"Missed you, too, Mom," I choked out, "Will you let me go?"

"No!"

"Charlotte," Loki peeled her off of me, taking the heat, "It's lovely to see you again."

"Hello, Loki," she started to calm down, "I'm sorry. I got a little carried away, didn't I?"

"A little carried away?" I giggled.

"Hush..." she scolded, "My baby girl doesn't come home for months. I deserve to go a little overboard when she finally does."

"Sorry," I apologized, "Fury keeps me pretty busy."

"I know," Mom pouted, "So! Tell me about the Virgin Islands! How was your trip?"

"Amazing," I smiled, sitting at the island in the kitchen, "You should've been there."

"On vacation with you and Loki?" she laughed, "No, thank you. I'd rather not see my daughter and her boyfriend in the throes of passion."

"Fiancé..." I kept my voice low.

"Excuse me?" Damn her bat like hearing.

"Charlotte," Loki calmed her, "While we were in the Virgin Islands..."

"Loki proposed!" I blurted out.

"WHAT?" Mom exploded.

"A man has asked me for my hand, Mama!" I beamed.

"When? How? Ring? Show!" she could only speak in short utterances.

"Mom!" I held her down, "Relax. I will show you my ring. I will tell you the whole story."

"Wonderful!" she sang, pulling me off my barstool, "Come on. Help me make dinner."

"I'm going to leave you two alone," Loki gave me a quick kiss, "I'll be right back. Charlotte, do you think I could trouble you for your car keys?"

"No trouble at all, sweetie," Mom tossed him her keys.

"Where do you think you're off to?" I wondered.

"You'll see," he promised, "It'll make this night a little more bearable.

"Fine," I let him go, but not without one last kiss, "I love you."

"Love you, too."

And just like that, Loki was out the door, leaving me to deal with my mother. I had to tell her everything. How Loki proposed. What we did on our trip. Casual catching up things. She may be a pain in the ass sometimes, but damn, I missed her. Sometimes a girl just needed her mom. It'd be nice if her dad was here, too...

"Hey, Mom," I asked, putting the chicken parmigiana in the oven, "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, honey," Mom allowed, "Shoot."

"Do you think Dad would've liked Loki...?"

"I'm not sure if he would've approved at first," she figured, "But I'm sure they would've gotten along eventually."

"I've been thinking about him a lot lately," I admitted, "I miss him."

"Me, too, puddin'," Mom put an arm around me, "You know, we actually talked about this moment a long time ago. You were probably ten. He said he'd put the man you married through the wringer."

"I could just imagine him and Loki," I chuckled, "Which one do you think would tap out first?"

"Loki," Mom chose sides, "Your dad would have him squirming like an ant under a magnifying glass."

"I don't know, Mom," I defended, "You don't know everything about Loki. He could have a trick or two up his sleeve."

"Against your dad?" she pointed out, "I think you're a little biased."

No. It wasn't bias. Mom didn't know about Loki's powers. Mom didn't know Loki was a demigod. As much as I love my father, Loki would have him beat in seconds. Dad would be the first to tap out. Easily.

"So, about your news," I asked, "What was so exciting that you couldn't tell me over the phone?"

"Well," she let out a heavy sigh, "You know I loved your father. Always will."

"Yeah."

"I have someone coming over tonight," she cringed, waiting anxiously for my reaction.

"Mom, you hussy," I teased.

"You're not upset?" she worried.

"Why would I be?" I wondered, "Mom, if he makes you happy, then that's all that matters. And I get to meet him tonight?"

"He's coming over tonight," Mom reiterated, "And I want both you and Loki on your best behavior. I don't want you scaring him off."

"Am I that scary?" I gave her a smirk that Loki himself would've been proud of, "I always thought I was kind of cute."

"Just mind the p's and q's, kid," she begged, "I really like this guy. He's been really good for me."

"Mom, kale is good for you," I gave her a look, "Bran muffins are good for you. Doesn't necessarily mean what's good for you is yummy."

"He's not a bran muffin," Mom laughed, "And he's not kale. He's a bowl of Lucky Charms on a Saturday morning while your favorite cartoons are on."

"You're nothing if not poetic," I shrugged, sitting back at the island.

"Darling," the front door opened, "I'm home."

"Haven't left the kitchen," I stole a kiss from Loki as soon as he walked in, "What'd you bring me?"

"Bring us," he corrected, pulling a bottle of moscato out of the bag, "I hope you don't mind, Charlotte."

"A bottle of wine and I didn't have to pay for it?" she already had the corkscrew out of the drawer, "Why would I mind?"

"And for you, my love," Loki whispered in my ear, "I got you a little something extra."

I looked down at the rest of the contents of the bag to find a bottle of scotch, "Oh, Loki. Bless you."

"You're welcome," he kissed my cheek, "So, what have you two been up to since I've been away?"

"You're a hopeless romantic, aren't you, Loki?" Mom teased.

"I'm sorry?"

"I told her about the proposal," I confessed, "And Sonnet 18."

"The greatest pick up line ever," Mom confirmed, "Any man that uses Sonnet 18 on a woman is guaranteed to get warm, squishy, naked cuddles."

"Nice, Mother," I rolled my eyes, then froze in my tracks. Come on, brain. I've been doing so good lately. Happy place. Happy place.

 _On your knees, slut. I want some squishy, naked cuddles. Now!_

He can't get me here. He won't get me here. He can't get me here. He won't get me here. Get the hell out of my head, Kilgrave.

"Are you alright, darling?" Loki asked, noticing my zoned out nature.

"Fine," I shook it off.

"Are you sure?" Mom jumped on the bandwagon, "For a minute, you looked like you were about to throw up."

"I'm fine," I reassured, "Don't worry about me."

Loki held me tight against him, knowing exactly what 'I'm fine' meant. He knew I was having Kilgrave flashbacks. And he knew how hard I was working to keep myself together. My brain was being held together with staples and rubber bands and super glue and duct tape and a piece of bubble gum. Eventually, the staples would rust away and the rubber bands will snap. The glue will wear off and the tape will rip. The sugar in the gum will dissolve. And what will be left is a hollow shell of what used to be me.

"Charlotte?" a familiar voice broke the silence, "Charlie, where are you?"

"In the kitchen, Phil!" Mom called out.

"Phil?" I gave her a look, "No...Not that Phil...Right?"

"Hi, honey," Coulson came in, putting an arm around my mother's waist and a kiss on her cheek, "Smells amazing. Hey, kiddo. How was the Virgin Islands?"

"How's my mother?" I growled.

"Outside," Mom grabbed my wrist, "Now."

As soon as the front door shut, I started the argument, "What the hell, Mom? Coulson? Of all people, Coulson?!"

"I know it's a bit of a shock," she attempted to calm me down, "But honestly, I couldn't have asked for anyone better."

"I have to work with him!" I snapped, "Do you know how weird that's going to make things for me?"

I know I had always thought of Coulson as a father figure as soon as I started with SHIELD, but this was ridiculous! I never expected him to ever have the possibility of becoming my stepdad. Something about this was definitely not sitting right in my stomach.

"What happened to what you said in the kitchen?" Mom threw that in my face, "As long as I'm happy, you're happy. No matter my decision. Phil is my decision, like it or not. I'm not asking you for your permission."

"You don't need to ask my permission," I assured, "I just wish you weren't dating one of my superiors. Why Coulson? Why not go all the way to the top and go with Fury?"

"Phil chose me," she smiled, "It started with him keeping me posted on you. Then, I took a weekend in the city while you were on a mission. We met up and…Well, we've been seeing each other ever since."

"I still don't like this, Mom," I let out a heavy, exasperated sigh, "But I'm not going to stand in the way of it either."

"Thank you," Mom gave me the biggest, tightest hug her tiny frame could've mustered up, "Just behave yourself tonight. Ok?"

"Ok," I pouted, "I don't have to like it, do I?"

"No."

"Alright," I nodded, "I can do this."

The two of us went back inside to find Coulson with my scotch in his hand. Immediately, I took the bottle from him and took a big, heavy drink from it. This dinner was going to be awkward and uncomfortable and I needed to be numb.

"So," Coulson broke the silence, "You never did answer my question. How was St. Thomas?"

"Needed," I sipped on my wine, "Loki and I got engaged."

"Congratulations!" he chimed, "When's the wedding?"

"We haven't decided yet," Loki held my hand under the table, steadying my rage shakes, "Spring wedding, my love?"

"No," I shook my head, using wedding planning as a welcomed distraction, "Actually, I was thinking more of a winter wedding."

"Oh?" I had Loki's attention, "Why a winter wedding?"

"Why not?" I was marrying a frost giant and he wondered why I wanted a winter wedding. Why I would want my husband in his element. He saw his inner frost giant as a curse. But little did he know, his fiancée found his Jotun side so beautiful.

"Alright," he allowed, "I can do a winter wedding."

"Good," I rested my head on Loki's shoulder.

"Besides," he whispered to me, "I can't wait to see you in traditional Asgardian regalia, darling. I really can't."

"What about you crazy kids?" I wondered, "You must be thinking about wedding bells already."

"No…" Mom shook her head violently, "We'd become common law before we actually got married."

"I don't know," Coulson shrugged, "If we're just entertaining the idea…"

"I've been married once before, Phil," she stood her ground, "I don't think I could do it again."

"I understand," he let it go, "I knew your husband, Charlie. He was a good man."

"He's the reason why I joined SHIELD," I chimed in, "My father helped people. I wanted to follow in his footsteps."

"I remember the day I recruited you," Coulson recalled, "Between your compassion and your tenacity, I knew you would've made a good agent."

"Have I let you down yet?"

"Not at all."

"Well," I excused myself, "It's been a long day. I think we're going to turn in."

"Alright, baby," Mom finished her second glass of moscato, "I got your room set up. Go ahead."

"Good night," Loki helped me up and the two of us went upstairs to my old bedroom. Just the way I left it. Star Wars poster to the left of the window. Bookshelf full of various knickknacks and tomes of my favorite childhood tales. One of those being a Shakespearean rewrite of Return of the Jedi called the Jedi Doth Return.

"You know, darling," Loki pulled me down to my bed, "This talk about our wedding has really got me thinking."

"No," I shot him down, "You know what happened the last time we attempted sex, Loki. I ended up having a Kilgrave flashback."

"I wasn't even thinking sex," he pulled me against his chest, "I was thinking about how beautiful you're going to be in traditional Asgardian robes."

"We're going to have to find a balance," I compromised, "My mom still doesn't know you're a god, baby. I think my relatives would be asking too many questions if I were in full traditional Asgardian robes."

"If I wasn't exiled," Loki said, "I'd take you to Asgard one day. Despite my hatred for the place, it really is rather beautiful."

"Maybe Thor can talk to Odin," I figured, "You could go back on probation like you are here."

"No," he shook his head, "You mean well, but I could never go back to Asgard. Not with Odin still on the throne. The next time I shall be even considered to be allowed on Asgardian soil is when a more suited king takes power."

"You?"

"Flattered," Loki blushed, "But I belong here."

"Are you saying I wouldn't make a good queen of Asgard?" I gasped dramatically, "Loki, I'm offended."

"You would make a most merciful queen," Loki assured, "Like Queen Frigga before you. But I was thinking more along the lines of Thor."

"I wish I could've met Queen Frigga," I nuzzled into him, "From the way you and Thor talk about her, she was an amazing woman."

"Yes, she was," Loki nodded, heartbreak in his eyes, "You should get some sleep, sweetheart. We're going home in the morning."

"Good," I yawned, "I miss the tower. I miss the family. I miss beating the shit out of Kilgrave every once in a while."

"No," he scolded, "What did I tell you about mentioning him while you're on vacation?"

"Sorry," I gave him a kiss, "Good night, Loki."

"Good night, my sweet…"

Those few words were enough to pull me under into the most gorgeous sleep I will ever have in my life. Loki was my favorite blanket, pillow, sleeping pill, and alarm clock. And I wouldn't trade him for the world.

 **A/N: I'm sorry this went up SUUUUUUPER late. I had a busy day today and little time to get anything done. Not to mention a little bit of a fit of rage toward the end, but that's here nor there and not story related. So! Leave me some nice words of encouragement and I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	12. Chapter 12

After a teary goodbye with my mother, an uncomfortable goodbye with Coulson, and an eight-and-a-half-hour train ride, I was finally home. Vacation was nice, but hanging around my favorite group of weirdos was even better. No matter how whiny and needy and taxing they can be. But before I stepped in any further to say hello, I needed to clear my head.

I was about to tell my eight best friends (give or take one. I didn't know if Jessica had left the tower or not) I was getting married, one of them being my future brother-in-law. I had found out just twelve hours ago that my mother was getting snuggly with Coulson. I had gotten engaged a few days ago! I could use a little time to myself. And what better way than flipping through the air?

I slipped into my binding and a short pair of black shorts and headed downstairs. I found Bucky mercilessly beating on a punching bag. Damn. I was hoping no one would be down here and the training room would be empty. Instead, I completely played it off, "Think you could use a sparring partner?"

"Hey!" Bucky ran over to me, spinning me in the air, "When did you come back?"

"I just got back actually," I shrugged, "I needed to center myself."

"That's very zen of you, kid," he caught a glimpse of my left hand, "I knew it..."

"Knew what?" I quivered nervously.

"You don't wear rings regularly," Bucky smirked, "Let alone emeralds."

"Oh," I forgot to take my ring off before I came down. I'm just a walking screw up today, aren't I?

"Congratulations, doll," he squeezed me tight, "When are you and Loki getting married?"

"Next winter," I blushed, "He proposed in the Virgin Islands."

"What a sap," Bucky teased, "Does anyone else know about this?"

"My mom," I chuckled, "Coulson. I think Thor knows."

"I'll keep my mouth shut," he promised, "I'll let you get to it then."

"Thanks, Bucky," I kissed his cheek, "Really and truly."

"Hey," he stopped in his tracks, "As bad as this is going to sound, I'm going to need you in my bed tonight."

"Not bad at all," I smiled, "I'll be there. Trouble sleeping again?"

"Yeah."

"Didn't the nerds in the lab mix you something?" I wondered.

"It stopped working," he sighed, "It's getting bad again."

"Your bed. Ten o'clock," I set, "You and me."

"Loki won't get mad?"

"Loki understands," I assured, "Besides, maybe we could mutually benefit from it..."

"Are you ok?" Bucky worried.

"Fine," I lied, "I just need to go clear my head. Where better than down here?"

"I get it," Bucky turned on his heel, "Don't hurt yourself!"

"I won't!" As soon as he was out of sight, I ran over to the restricted door. I let the keypad scan my hand and I pushed the heavy metal door open. Oh, the restricted area. How I love thee so. I strapped on my harness and hooked myself to the cables. All I was missing was a little music, "JARVIS?"

"Yes, Miss?" my favorite AI responded.

"I need a playlist," I ordered, "No sense doing this in silence. Leaves me alone with my thoughts too much."

And God knows I didn't want that, "Anything in particular?"

"Surprise me," I did a quick stretch, "I've been here for a while. I'm sure you know me well enough to mix something good for me."

"Very well," JARVIS obliged, chewing on it for a minute, "Today's playlist is a compilation of dubstep, nightcore, and a touch of Japanese pop music."

"Perfect," I beamed, running up the stairs, "Thank you, JARVIS. What's first?"

"Lindsey Stirling's Shatter Me."

I could get on board with that. I took my first jump down and ran around the room, gaining more and more momentum, ready for that first bass drop. This was really starting to bring me back. A warm and fuzzy memory straight out of my childhood.

When I was a kid, my mother forced me into gymnastics. I didn't want to do gymnastics. I would've preferred getting lost in adventures of the literary nature. An alleged trip to the bookstore turned into a grave betrayal and I was forced into a gymnastics studio. But when I saw what they could do, it amazed me, blowing my ten-year-old mind. Now, I was so thankful I didn't write it off. And no one was better at aerials than me.

I flipped and soared between the beams and columns, feeling like an honest to God superhero. It brought me to a place of complete peace and balance. Sweet, sweet serenity. My body was in a complete state of pure bliss. I waited for the next song to start playing before I did another run.

"Who knew you were so graceful...?" a voice broke the silence. Restricted or not, I'd be stupid to go anywhere empty handed. Or in this case, without my holster strapped to my thigh. The sound of my .22 cocking echoed around the room, "Put the gun down, darling. It's only me."

"How the hell did you get in here?" I jumped down, "This area's restricted."

"Well," Loki steadied me, "First, I may have followed you. Second, when I realized your hand worked for the scanner, I may have shapeshifted into you."

"And your shapeshifting worked?" I gave him a look, making a mental note to tell Tony that the software needs an upgrade.

"Somehow, yes," Loki changed into me, "See? Practically twins. Like looking in a mirror."

"Right down to handprints," I looked his palm over, "Change back. This is really starting to make me uncomfortable."

"What were you doing in here all by yourself?" he turned back.

"I thought you saw," I pointed out.

"I did," he nodded, "And you were incredible."

"Helps me keep sharp," I brushed him off, unhooking my harness from the cables.

"Don't stop on my account," Loki begged, "Do continue."

"What are you doing here, Loki?" I sighed, strapping back in.

"I came here looking for you," he pulled me against him, "Why won't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"When you're hurting..." Loki couldn't look at me. He just held me tighter.

"Because," I wiggled out of his embrace, "Sometimes, I need to be alone. This is where I go to be alone. Why is that such a hard concept for you to grasp?"

"Because I don't want you to think you have to be alone!" he snapped. Loki never yelled at me like that before with such malice.

"I don't want to be your burden," I grumbled, "Look at me, Loki. I've become a complete head case since I've been home. How you've managed to stick with me this long is nothing short of a miracle. I'm a walking disaster. I'm a damn time bomb waiting to go off. Do you know the kind of hell that's raging in the interworking of my brain right now? I didn't think so. So, please. If this can help me keep my balance, leave me alone..."

"No," Loki stood his ground, "I'm not going anywhere. The sooner you realize that, the easier this will go."

I looked into Loki's eyes as they began to ice over. That wasn't anger. It was fear. Fear he'd lose me. Fear he'd never see me again. Fear that I was going to end up hurting myself in my fits of self-loathing.

I had to keep myself together. Like I said, I don't want to be Loki's burden any more than I have to be. Going completely batshit at a time like this wouldn't exactly be a good idea, "Leave. You have better things to worry about than me."

"Do I?" he started to come down, "I don't have anything better than you, yet somehow I have better things to worry about? You're just as much my mission as I am yours. You need your space to help you through, that's fine. Just remember that whenever you're ready for Chernobyl, I'll put my raincoat on and prepare the fallout shelter."

I nuzzled my face in Loki's shoulder, a few tears escaping my eyes, "Thank you...And I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for, darling?" he comforted.

"For being a bitch," I chuckled nervously, "I guess you can worry about me a little."

"Wonderful," Loki kissed the top of my head, "Now, all of our friends are upstairs. We have the most amazing news to share. Will you join me?"

"In a minute," I said, "I want to hammer out another song, if that's alright with you."

"That's fine," he approved, "You think I could stay and watch?"

"No one watches, Loki," I shot him down, "Remember? This is Mommy's special alone time?"

"You're not my mother, my sweet," he teased, "Please? I want to watch."

I mulled it over for a minute or two. And as much as this was a place of zen for me, I had a feeling that Loki wasn't going anywhere. I hooked my harness back up to the cables, "Fine. I guess you can stay and watch."

"Thank you," Loki gave me a quick kiss, "Go on. JARVIS?"

"Yes, Loki?" JARVIS chimed in, "What can I do for you, sir?"

"Could you play Merry Go Round of Life, please?" he requested.

"Of course, sir," JARVIS accepted.

"Hold on," I stopped him, "No. You're not seducing me with Joe Hisaishi."

"Who said anything about seduction?" Loki asked.

"No," I glared daggers into my demigod, "I don't want something light and airy and graceful. JARVIS?"

"Yes, Miss?"

"You said in my playlist, you had Japanese pop music, right?"

"Yes, Miss."

"I need something to make my blood pump," I thought out loud, "Give me YUI's Again. And crank it."

"As you wish."

"You wanted to see me crush a routine?" I smirked, "Watch me."

As soon as the opening riff started, I ran up the wall and onto one of the upper balconies. A couple of soft flips before it opened up into the bridge. Then, it was backflips and twists and turns and parkour moves that I didn't even know I could do. Amazing what I could do when I was in complete focus. And half running on adrenaline. And half running on spite. The song came to a close as the final riff faded out and I stuck a killer landing.

"Very nicely done," Loki praised, "I give it a ten."

"Damn right, you give it a ten," I boasted, completely out of breath, "That was the best routine I've done in years. And I'm exhausted."

"Come on," Loki unhooked my harness and undid all the straps, "Upstairs."

"Shower first," I insisted, "Then, upstairs."

I was hot, sweaty, and gross and desperate enough to use the showers in the training room. I did a quick scan of the room to make sure the cameras weren't watching. Sure enough, I saw a little red light blink in the corner. I extended a friendly middle finger to the lens and the pervert watching the footage. Seconds later, the light turned off and I enjoyed the peace and quiet of my shower.

When I made it back upstairs, everyone was hanging around the living room, having a hoot of a time, bullshitting, swapping stories, attempting to pick up Mjolnir. A typical Tuesday night at the tower when everyone was home. All it was missing was me. And maybe a drink in my hand. But that was neither here nor there.

I made my way into the living room as covertly as humanly possible while everyone was distracted and starting mixing a drink, "Anyone? While I'm back here?"

"When the hell did you come in?" Clint jumped, noticing me at the mini bar, shaking my drink. 

"A few minutes ago," I shrugged, "Why?"

"You're a damn ninja," he caught his breath.

"I couldn't be prouder," Natasha praised, "I trained you well, kid. Welcome home."

"Keep your pride, Nat," I passed, pouring my vodka in a little glass, "I got some good news."

"Care to share with the rest of us?" Bruce asked.

"Loki," I smiled over at my fiancé, "Would you like to tell them or should I?"

"I thought Fury said not to get pregnant while you were gone," Tony sassed.

"I'm not pregnant," I rolled my eyes, "Engaged, yes. Pregnant, no." 

"Congratulations, sweetheart," Steve gave me a heartfelt embrace, "When's the wedding?"

"Next winter," Loki chimed in.

"Welcome to the family, my lady," Thor squeezed me tight, "It is truly an honor."

"Thanks, Thor," I blushed.

"Well," Tony got up from the couch, "We're out."

"Where are you crazy kids off to?" I wondered.

"Giving Steve a new life experience," Tony smirked. I made mental notes of his face. Tony was up to something. I could almost smell it, "Bruce?"

"Sure," he shrugged, "I guess I'm in."

"Barton?"

"What the hell?" Clint got up, "Can't miss that. Natasha?"

"No, thanks," she passed, "I'd rather stay in."

"Bucky?" Tony offered, "You've probably never seen one of these either."

"Yeah," Bucky followed, "I'll go. I got nothing better to do tonight."

"Thor?"

"Why not?" Thor agreed, "Loki, you, too."

"I'd rather not," Loki declined.

"We have many a celebration!" Thor boomed, "Come with us!"

"Go ahead," I allowed, "You can go out and have fun without me. Steve, can I have a word with you for a moment, sweetie?"

"Yes, ma'am," I pulled him off to the side, "What is it?"

"I may have Loki domesticated," I kept my voice down, "But God only knows what Tony has planned for tonight. I don't want the God of Mischief to get too mischievous, if you know what I mean."

"You don't want old Loki to come back," Steve figured, "And Tony's a terrible influence. Got it."

"Thank you, Steve," I wrapped my arms around him, "I appreciate it."

"Can we go now, Mom?" Tony asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"Yes," I rolled my eyes, "You boys be careful. I don't want a phone call tomorrow morning from any of you saying you lost Loki only to find the poor little angel sunburned on the roof."

"The Hangover, right?" Steve asked.

"Yep," Tony praised, "Relax, kid. Not happening. SHIELD has him chipped. We won't lose him." 

"SHIELD has me what?" Loki squeaked, "After all this time on Midgard, all this redemption, I bring in a bloody superhuman serial killer, and SHIELD still doesn't trust me?"

"Welcome to the club," Bruce scoffed.

"We're out," Tony led the charge into the elevator.

Before Loki could even step out the door, I grabbed his hand and pulled him down to my face, "Please. Be careful tonight, Loki."

"I will," he assured, "You act as if I'm so impressionable."

"Sweetheart," I put my hand to my perfectly flawed demigod's face, "You are the very definition of impressionable. And when you're left to your own devices, you're even worse."

"I'm not a child," Loki giggled, "Honestly, darling. I'll be fine. I promise I will come home in one piece without any warrants."

"That's very reassuring," I teased, getting one last kiss, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

And just like that, my boys were out the door. That was kind of a bummer. I tell them all such wonderful news and they leave me. What the hell? I threw myself on the couch next to Natasha, "So, what do we do?"

"You'll see…" I guess Tony Stark isn't the only one with a plan up their sleeve, "Jessica! They're gone!"

"Thought they'd never leave," Jessica walked back out, "By the way, congratulations on the engagement."

"How'd you know?" I gave her a look, "I just told everyone."

"Oh…" she bit her tongue, "I guess now's a bad time to tell you that everyone knew about you and Loki getting engaged except for you…"

"When you say everyone…" I grumbled.

"Everyone," Natasha confirmed, "Thor went with him to get the ring. He asked me for an opinion. He asked Fury and Coulson for their blessing."

"Coulson knew?" I perked up, "Coulson knew about Loki and me getting engaged?"

"Yeah," Natasha said, "Why?"

"If I tell you two something," I lowered my voice, "Promise me you won't tell anyone else?"

"Swear," Jessica assured, "What's up?"

"Coulson's seeing my mother," I cringed, "Loki and I flew in to see her yesterday and Coulson showed up for dinner. And he was there this morning."

"Oh…" Natasha empathized, "I'm sorry."

"Coulson…" Jessica thought over, "Is he the one that looks like a tax accountant, but he could probably kill a man with his bare hands?"

"Yep."

"Look," Natasha comforted, "What you need is to get your mind off of things. Kilgrave, Coulson, the future anxiety the wedding's going to give you. Take a night."

"Loki told me that I can't say the K word while I'm supposed to be on vacation," I finished my drink, "And I'd rather a quiet night of lying in bed, staring at my ceiling, waiting for Loki to come home."

"No," she shook her head, "I refuse to let that happen.

"I appreciate it, Natasha," I thanked, "But I just want to go to bed. Besides, I have a date tonight at ten."

"With who?"

"Bucky's not sleeping again," I sighed, "I have to put the baby to bed."

"Then, we have two hours to get your as intoxicated as possible," Jessica smirked, "Romanoff, start pouring."

"Which country first?" Natasha asked me, sliding across the bar.

"I don't know," I winced, "I really shouldn't."

"Come on," Jessica nudged me, "All the cool kids are doing it."

"Never was one of the cool kids," I chuckled darkly.

"Then, I'm choosing for you," Natasha grabbed a bottle, "We're starting in the motherland!"

"What drink are you passing as American?" Jessica asked.

"Not her motherland," she clarified, handing me a shot, "Mine!"

"Oh my God," I choked on my shot, "Nat, was that straight vodka?"

"Yeah," she did a shot, "Why?"

"A bit much, don't you think?" I recovered.

"Don't be a pussy," Jessica teased, "I'm thinking we go to Mexico next. Does Tony have any decent tequila?"

"Patron good enough?"

"Good enough!" she chirped, "I'm going to order a pizza."

"I'm going to keep pouring!" Natasha got the tequila.

"I'm going to regret this," I kicked my feet up on the couch.

"Come on," Natasha sat next to me, "You can stand to have a little fun once in a while."

"I guess," I grumbled, "You know what I'd love to do right now?"

"What's that?"

"Go down to the detention level," I smiled, "Maximum. Go bat Kilgrave around like I'm a cat and he's my ball of yarn."

"As much as I love a good smack of someone that deserves it," she agreed, "I'm not going to let you do that."

"Why not?" I whined, "I want to tear his balls off with my bare hands."

"Get in line," Jessica rejoined us.

"Because it's not going to solve anything," Natasha pointed out, "He's still going to be an asshole. He'll just be more battered and bruised than before."

"So, a battered and bruised asshole," Jessica thought out loud, "Not much different than what he'd get in a regular prison."

I let out a heavy, exasperated sigh, "You're not going to let me get out of tonight, are you?"

"No," Natasha smiled, handing me another shot, "However, I am all for numbing your emotions to the best of my ability, so we have a handful of other countries to get through tonight before everyone comes back."

"Super," I downed the shot of tequila and took it like a champ, "Who needs Epcot?"

"That's the spirit!" she nudged me in the shoulder.

"And after a few more of these," I pointed out, "I can go kick the shit out of Kilgrave and blame it on being drunk."

"No," Jessica kept me down, "No Kilgrave tonight. Come on, kid. You just got back from being on vacation. You don't need him ruining your post-Virgin Islands buzz."

"But I want to drive my fist through his chest..."

"And no one in this entire world understands that more than me," Jessica nodded, "But not tonight. Tonight, we take the tour of Epcot, as you so eloquently put it, and have a little fun. Is that too much to ask?"

"And beat on Kilgrave tomorrow?"

"You can come with me tomorrow to give Kilgrave his regularly scheduled beating," she promised.

"No, she can't," Natasha shook her head, "This one's still on vacation. Going to check on Kilgrave still constitutes as a work thing. She stays away from any SHIELD activity for another week and a half."

"Dammit," I pouted, "I was forced to have dinner with a superior. Does that count as a work thing?"

"Off the clock."

"Shit!" I squeaked, "Not that this hasn't been a good old time, guys, but I think I'm going to head off to bed."

"Nope," Jessica pulled me back down to the couch, "I will hold you here."

"That's not fair, Jessica," I called her out, "You have super strength."

"And don't you forget it."

"Hey, Jessica," Natasha broke us up, "Pizza should be on its way by now, right? Or here?"

Ding!

"Pizza's here," Jessica took her arms away from me, "Go get the door."

"Might take off with the pizza guy," I rolled my eyes and grabbed the door. The pizza guy was huge for being a pizza guy, "Hi."

"Hello." And gorgeous. With a warm, earth shattering voice to match, "Only one pizza?"

"Yeah," I confirmed, "You did only order one, right, Jess?"

"No," she beamed, "I ordered three."

"Excuse me," another pizza guy showed up, "I have a pizza delivery for Jessica Jones."

"So do I!" yet another attractive pizza delivery guy followed behind him.

"You ordered from three different places?" I gave her a look.

"I'm very particular about my pizza," a dirty smirk stretched across her face, "You boys want to come in?"

"Sure," the three pizza guys came in and put their respective pizzas down.

"Oh, son of a bitch," I started piecing things together, "You didn't…"

"JARVIS?" Natasha called out, "You think you could give us a little music, please?"

"Yes, Ms. Romanoff," JARVIS obliged, turning on some loud, bassy techno.

And sure enough, the "pizza guys" started peeling their clothes off. All I could do was shake my head, "You hired strippers?!"

"They're not all strippers," Jessica took the one in the middle, "This one's a reputable bar owner. And I call dibs on him."

"So, this is where you've been hiding out," Jessica's choice wrapped his arms around her, "You could've told me."

"Hi, honey. I'm home," Jessica smiled, surrendering to the man's kiss.

I leaned over to Natasha, "Isn't there some unspoken rule in the world of male strippers that you're not allowed to touch like that?"

"I think so," Nat had laid claims to her own personal stripper, "But if she can touch hers…"

"Guys, this is Luke," Jessica introduced her stripper, "He's my, for lack of a better word, boyfriend."

"Pleasure," I smiled politely.

"Now," Luke held Jessica a little tighter, "How about a dance, baby?"

"I didn't bring any cash," she shrugged.

"That's fine," he took her out of the room while Natasha and I had two strange, but beautiful men dancing on us. I kept being fed shots while, who I affectionately referred to as Cinnamon (He was a ginger with the most glorious beard and pipes the size of my head. I couldn't have called him anything else.), danced in my lap, doing his best to make me smile. And it was definitely working. I loved Loki dearly, but Cinnamon with a C was starting to turn into Sinnamon with an S. And he was getting a little too close.

"Hey there," I slowed him down, feeling his lips on my neck, "I'm spoken for."

"It's only for tonight," Cinnamon whispered in my ear, "I'll do whatever you want."

"And I want you to slow your roll," I pushed him off me a little.

"Alright, sweetheart," he obliged, "I understand. You have a man you go home to. You wouldn't want to ruin it."

"What the hell…?"

I hadn't really been keeping track of time. I looked down at my phone and it had hit ten o'clock. I had a date with another man. Dear God, I'm really sounding like a slut here, aren't I?

"Hey, Bucky," I got Cinnamon off me.

"Is he the one you come home to?" he asked.

"No," I shook him off. Along with the insane amount of glitter in my hair, "Sorry, sweetie. I lost track of time."

"What is all this?" Bucky wondered.

"Jessica hired strippers for some ungodly reason," I rolled my eyes, "Is everyone else back or just you?"

"It's just me," Bucky wiped more glitter off me, "Great minds, I guess."

"What do you mean?" I took Bucky to his bedroom and shut the door.

"Stark took us all to a strip club," he said, stripping down to his boxers and a t-shirt, "I've known Steve since he first decided to enlist in the military and never have I seen him so uncomfortable. He told half the girls that he wanted to send them to college. Thor was enjoying himself, but Loki was trying to cover them up. Saying something like they're better than that and they deserve better than this."

"Sounds like Loki," my heart felt so warm, "Also sounds like Stark. I had a feeling you guys were going somewhere unsavory."

"What about you?" Bucky teased, "You had them brought here like take-out."

"I was under the impression they were pizza guys," I defended, crawling into bed with him, "Not my fault. Blame Jessica."

Bucky rested his head on my chest and pulled the blanket over us, "Thank you for doing this."

"No problem, Bucky," I cradled him, "I'm telling you. I bet if I were to find you a woman, you wouldn't need me anymore."

"No," he cuddled into me, "I don't think I'm really ready to go and find someone quite yet. We'll wait until HYDRA's completely out of my head."

"When was the last time you had a steady girlfriend?" I wondered.

"Probably since the forties," Bucky chuckled a little, "Her name was Clara. Beautiful thing. Dark hair, dark eyes. Cute, little body. And a smile that made the world stop turning. I'd kill to spend another night with her. But unfortunately, she's probably long gone by now. That's the worst part about being on ice as long as what Steve and I were. We're all we have left anymore. All of our friends and family are dead."

"You got us," I reminded, "Until the very end, Bucky. We're not going anywhere. Now, try to get some sleep, ok?"

"I'll try," Bucky's embrace tightened a little, "Night, doll."

"Good night," I pushed his hair out of his face, "Want me to get rid of the strippers and kill the music?"

"If you wouldn't mind…"

"Alright," I got out of Bucky's bed, "I'll be right back, ok?"

"Promise?" he grabbed my wrist, looking like he was afraid of losing me. I had seen the look once before and it left a pit in my stomach.

"Yes," I assured, "I promise you, James. As soon as I get rid of the strippers, I'll be right back in here."

"Ok," he trusted, "You sure?"

"Yes," I shut the door on the way out and went back into the living room, "JARVIS, kill the music."

"Why?" Natasha whined, a little drunker than before, "We were having a good time."

"Because Bucky's a painful insomniac," I reminded as the music died out, "And he needs to get some sleep. Sorry, boys. You have to go."

"Alright," Cinnamon and his buddy got off the couch.

"Here," I dug five hundred dollars out of my pocket, "For the pizzas."

"Thanks," Cinnamon kissed my cheek, "I really had a good time tonight. Maybe you and I could be friends…?"

"I don't think that's going to happen," I broke the news, "Sorry."

"That's fine," he brushed it off, "Hey, where's Luke?"

"Hold on," I said, "I'll go get him."

"Ok."

I went down the hall behind the kitchen and knocked on the door, "Jessica, Luke has to go home now…Party's over."

"Come back in five minutes!" Jessica called out from behind the door.

"No," I shot her down, "He has to go now. Bucky needs to get some sleep."

The sounds of muffled screams and a breaking bed echoed through the hall, "Five minutes!"

"Ok!" I walked away, slightly traumatized. I didn't need to hear that. However, I was thankful I didn't have to see it. God only knows what was going on in there to make the bed break.

"Are you ok?" Natasha worried, "You look like you just saw a ghost or something."

"No," I cringed, "But I'm pretty sure Luke's in the middle of giving Jessica the ol' razzle dazzle, so I'm going to forget that ever happened. Boys, I bid you adieu."

"Good night!" Cinnamon called after me and he and his partner took off down the elevator.

"Hey," Nat stopped me, "I'm sorry this night was such a trainwreck."

"Trainwreck?" I gave her a look, "This was the most fun I've had in ages. I wouldn't call it a trainwreck."

"Good night, kid," she started heading for her bedroom.

"Night, Natasha!" The two of us parted ways and I went back into Bucky's bedroom. Sure enough, the little angel was out like a light. It made me so happy to see him sleeping so soundly. And I swear to God, if anyone attempted to wake him up tomorrow morning, afternoon, night, however long it took, I was fully prepared to kill them. I kissed his forehead and pulled the blankets over him a little better. Good night, sweetheart. Rest easy.

 **A/N: So, strippers. Sinnamon. I may or may not have been tainted by Tumblr. Please forgive me. And I wonder why this doesn't get the recognition and love it deserves…But! In case you're having a hard time coping between updates, I'm starting to post spoilers on Snapchat. My username is LumiOlivier. You get cheap lols, the occasional shot of my mediocre face, and sometimes, you get friendly neighborhood spoilers. And I follow back, so we can be buddies! And I'm thinking about starting another series to post fan fiction about. If you have any requests, I'd gladly take them. See you next chapter, guys! xx**


	13. Chapter 13

Creeeeak...

I looked over at the alarm clock on my nightstand. What the hell? 3AM? I felt a slight dip in the bed on the other side. Then, an arm wrapped around me and my ass was in his lap.

"Loki?" I hoped.

"Yes, darling...?" he slurred, holding me tighter.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Cuddling with you..."

I looked over my shoulder to find my beautiful demigod drunk out of his skin. Fantastic. When I looked closer, I found out that I wasn't the only one covered in stripper glitter, "Loki...Did you go to the strip club tonight?"

"I sure did," Loki grumbled into my shoulder blades, "But none of them could compare to you."

"And you're drunk, aren't you?"

"Very."

"How?" I wondered, "I thought it took a lot for you and Thor to get drunk."

"It does," he confirmed, "And I did."

"Dammit, Stark," I mumbled to myself, "We'll talk in the morning. I'm too damn tired to argue with you and I need to sleep off my buzz."

"Ok..."

Even drunk, Loki managed to still be pretty adorable when he was tired. And I couldn't be mad at that face. I kissed his forehead, "Nighty night, Loki."

"Nighty night, Shakespeare..." he babbled deliriously before finally slipping under. I wasn't too far behind him. I finished my glass of water, nuzzled into his ribcage, and shut my eyes.

When morning rolled around, I slid Loki off me. And he let out the loudest, longest, most pathetic sounding whimper I have ever heard in my life. I pushed his hair out of his face and if I didn't know any better, I would've thought I saw tears, "Good morning, baby."

"Please let me die," Loki begged, "I welcome sweet death."

"You're not dying, Loki," I rolled my eyes, half regretting it for a second, but then, I was alright again, "You're hungover. There's a difference."

"I'd rather be dying," he pulled the blankets over him, blocking out the sunlight seeping through the curtains.

"You should get that on a t-shirt," I teased, "I'm sure cynical hipsters around the world would be going apeshit."

"For once, they're onto something..."

"Here," I nuzzled my face in his neck, "How about I get you some aspirin and make some breakfast?"

"Yes, please," Loki gave me a kiss, "You're a saint. Did you know that?"

"I had a hunch," I got out of bed and put some sweatpants on, "I'm going to go check on the others first. You go back to sleep."

"Ok..."

He may have been a big baby when he was in pain like this, but he was my big baby. Speaking of, I had a few more to peek in on. I looked next door in Bucky's room and found him still sleeping soundly. That's what I like to see. I walked out into the kitchen to find Bruce at the coffee pot and Steve at the island with his sketchbook open.

"Morning, boys," I grabbed the loose tea out of the cabinet and the infuser.

"Morning," Bruce gave me a cup.

"Morning," Steve chimed in.

"You two are awfully chipper this morning," I noticed, "Didn't you guys go out last night, too?"

"Yeah," Steve put his pen down, "Never again. Strip clubs are disgusting."

"Everyone's a critic," I sat with him, "You two went out and you're not miserable the morning after?"

"I don't drink," Bruce poured the creamer in his cup, "Not exactly a good idea for someone like me."

"And I can't get drunk," Steve said, "Side effect of the serum."

"You guys wouldn't happen to know the state of everyone else," I cringed, "Would you?"

"I'd avoid everyone else," Bruce advised, "Last night wasn't exactly easy for the others."

"I saw some things," Steve winced, "Things I never wanted to see in my life."

"I'm right there with you," Bruce agreed, "Seeing Tony doing body shots off a stripper was gross. Seeing him doing body shots off Loki was worse."

"Hold on," I stopped him, "My Loki?"

"What other Loki would be wandering the streets of Manhattan with us?" Bruce wondered.

"You managed to keep him in line, though," I asked, "Right, Steve?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "I kept a pretty close eye on him. But as soon as I came back from the bathroom, Loki was on his back with vodka in his bellybutton."

"Goddammit, Tony…" I held my face in my hands, "Should I make sure Clint and Thor are still breathing?"

"Clint's still sleeping," Natasha walked out, right as rain.

"I'm surprised you're not," I worried, "You were pounding shots last night, too. How you feeling, Natasha?"

"I'm resilient," she shrugged.

"I was meaning to ask you," Steve chimed in, "Why is the couch covered in glitter?"

"We had takeout," Natasha covered, shooting a wink at me.

"Have you seen Jessica?" I wondered.

"I think she's still in bed," she grabbed a cup from the cabinet, "Are you making breakfast?"

"Told Loki I would," I sighed, "But honestly, I have zero desire to cook. I'm thinking about saying screw it and stealing the box of donuts from the breakroom."

"Maybe I could make breakfast," a deep, rumbly voice joined us.

"Who are you?" Bruce asked, getting defensive.

"Luke, right?" I figured, "You're Jessica's boyfriend."

"Yeah," he nodded, "Sorry. Kind of fell asleep last night. And broke her bed."

"Guess she doesn't know her own strength sometimes," I joked.

"Or mine…" Luke added, "I'm guessing she hasn't told you about me."

"No," I shook my head, "Feel free to enlighten us. This is a safe space."

"Yeah," Luke chuckled, "I'd say so. When Jessica told me she was staying in Avenger Tower, I thought she was joking."

"So, tell us about yourself, Luke," Steve asked, "I'm actually curious."

"If Jess is living here," Luke went on, "I'm guessing you know that she's superhuman."

"Yes."

"Well," Luke sat down, "So am I. I have strength and impenetrable skin."

"Bruce turns green and violent when he's angry and I'm actually in my mid-nineties," Steve shook Luke's hand, "Steve Rogers."

"Luke Cage," he introduced himself, "I've heard a lot about you, Captain."

"Really?" Steve gave him a look, "Jessica has talked about us?"

"Actually," Luke giggled, "She texted me a picture of her holding up a Dorito when your back was turned and it matched perfectly."

"Ha, ha," Steve laughed sarcastically.

"It's true, Steve," I pointed out, "Your shoulder-waist ratio is the exact shape of a Dorito. You can't tell me you've never noticed."

"No, I haven't," he pouted, "I am not proportioned like a Dorito!"

"Pictures don't lie, man," Luke took his phone out and showed Steve the picture Jessica sent him.

"Son of a gun," Steve confirmed, "I guess I'm kind of proportioned like a Dorito, aren't I?"

"Told you so," I grinned.

"Am I making breakfast or no?" Luke wondered.

"No, sweetie," I assured, "You don't need to do that. I suggest you get the hell out of here before SHIELD security starts asking questions."

"That's probably a great idea," Luke agreed, grabbing his jacket, "Could you have Jessica call me when she wakes up? I'm sure she'll want an explanation."

"Sure," I nodded, "Thanks for the good time last night, Luke. You and your boys are welcome to bring us pizza any time. Give Cinnamon my love."

"Cinnamon?" Luke gave me a look.

"Pretty face?" I described, "Ginger? Probably could bench me? Great ass?"

"He has a name."

"Yeah. Cinnamon."

"No. Morgan," Luke corrected, "Why is he Cinnamon?"

"I gave him a stripper name," I shrugged, "He didn't tell me no."

"Well, see you around, kid," Luke waved behind him as he took the elevator down.

"Wish me luck," I got up, "I'm about to go into the lion's den and check on Tony."

"Godspeed," Natasha gave me a half salute and I made my way into Tony's bedroom. I was scared. It was a rarity that Tony got sick, but I had never seen him hungover.

"Tony…?" I whispered. Nothing, "Tony…?"

Awesome. Stark's still asleep. I didn't have to deal with him. I must've had friends in high places that didn't want me to have to deal with the resident pain in the ass. Aside from Loki.

"If you don't have painkillers," a familiar voice grumbled, "I swear I will end you. I will throw you off the balcony."

"Hi, Tony," I took a bottle of ibuprofen from my pocket, "I have a whole bottle."

"Bless you," he groaned, "I feel like shit."

"I have a bone to pick with you," I scolded.

"Pick it later," Tony demanded, throwing two white tablets back, "I'm too miserable."

"I know, sweetie," I sat on the edge of his bed, "Don't you have someone to take care of you that's not me?"

"Pepper's in DC," he yawned, wrapping his arms around my waist, resting his head in my lap, "She's playing with the Department of Defense."

"Do you need anything?" I asked, "I'm thinking about making a coffee run."

"The blacker, the better."

"Ok," I pulled the blanket back over him and kissed his cheek, "You can't tell me you didn't see this coming."

"What do you mean?"

"This is what happens when you're slurping vodka out of my fiancé's bellybutton, you dick."

"Oh…" Tony turned away from me, "You heard about that?"

"Yeah…" I nodded, "You took Steve and Bucky to a strip club last night? Not only Steve and Bucky, but Thor and Loki, too?"

"What's so bad about that?" he defended.

"You don't take Loki to a strip club!" I snapped, "Ever again!"

"Do you think you could keep it down…?"

"NOT REALLY!" I raised my voice, "I swear, if I ever hear your tongue's in Loki's bellybutton again, we're going to have a problem."

"Yes ma'am."

I let Tony go back to sleep and peeked in on my future brother-in-law. Sure enough, the big, bad God of Thunder looked like a giant puppy. Thor was still out cold. My little angel…I'm sure he was in the same shape as the rest of them. Poor baby…You didn't ask for this. You didn't ask for Stark to show you scantily clad women and feed you shots.

"Hey, guys," I walked out into the living room, "Coffee run. Anybody?"

"I'm good," Steve chirped.

"Me, too," Bruce agreed, "How is he?"

"Stark?" I scoffed, "He's in his own private hell."

"So much for the vacation," Natasha teased.

"What can I say?" I shrugged, heading for the door, "A mother's work is never done."

I poked my head in Bucky's door. Still sleeping. Probably making up for lost time. I had one more little angel to check on before I left for the dark elixir of the gods. I opened bed bedroom door and crawled into bed.

"Hello, darling," Loki pulled me closer, "What brings you by?"

"Checking in," I cuddled, "Going on a coffee run. You want anything while I'm out?"

"No," Loki cradled me, "That's quite alright. I just want you to lay with me for a while."

"And I'd be more than happy to do just that," I gave him a quick kiss, "But I have to go. I'll be right back. I promise."

"Alright, my dear," he let me go, "Do come back later. I kind of miss you."

"Kind of?" I chuckled, "Thanks, Loki. You know how to make a girl feel loved."

"I love you..."

Dammit...Those three little words that could fix just about anythng when they came out of his mouth, "I love you, too, baby."

I left Loki to get some sleep and slipped out the front door. Little did everyone know, I wasn't exactly going for coffee right away. I needed to make a quick detour. I took the elevator all the way down to maximum. I had an asshole to go visit and possibly kick the shit out of.

There he was. Kilgrave was still kept under heavy sedation, so naturally, he was knocked out. And a part of me wated to go in his cell and really knock him out. How in the hell did this prick sleep so soundly? In his narcotics induced haze, Kilgrave almost looked kind of innocent and peaceful.

But I knew better. I knew what he was capable of. I knew the things he made people do. Whatever SHIELD has planned for him will be too kind. Too gentle. This dick deserved to be burned alive. And I'd be more than happy to be the one holding the gas and the match.

"Aren't we a glutton for punishment?" a familiar voice boomed from the shadows, "You do know what vacation means, right? You don't come into work and anything work related isn't your problem?"

"I'm sorry, sir," I apologized, "I couldn't help myself."

"I know," Fury put an arm around me, "Are you sure you're doing ok?"

"No," I confessed, "But I'll persevere."

"I'm sure you will," Fury assumed, pulling out a business card, "Here."

"What's this?" I wondered.

"He's your guy," he ordered, "You have an appointment Monday morning."

"I have a guy?"

"Loki's insistance," Fury said, "He worries about you."

"Oh, I know," I smiled, "I'm well aware of that."

"We all do," he admitted, "I don't want one of the best damn agents I've ever had turn to mush because of a bad mission."

"I won't."

"Go. Don't go. It's up to you," Fury shrugged, "Beating the hell out of him can only do so well for so long."

"Yes, sir," I nodded.

"And by the way," a tiny smirk made an appearance on my superior's face, "That's a nice ring on your finger, kid. Congratulations."

"Thank you, sir."

Fury went back upstairs while I played with the card in my hand. Monday morning, huh...? Loki did say he wanted me to see someone as soon as we got back…

 **A/N: Hi, guys! Be sure to leave a nice thank you note in the comments section. (If you're reading this right after I posted) It's a miracle I updated today. I've been super sick the past couple days and I've been in and out of it all day. But! Today being April 1** **st** **, (again, if reading this right after I posted) I can't have a fan fiction about the God of Mischief and** _ **not**_ **have him cause a little mischief. So! The following is a short one-shot of Loki getting into April Fool's Day shenanigans around Avenger Tower. You're welcome. (Oops...I thought I updated this yesterday. Turns out I put it in the doc manager and forgot to finish the process. Sorry, guys! xP)**

I had hoped to God that Loki didn't see a calendar today. The God of Mischief on April Fool's Day just smelled like disaster. And we'd all end up the victim at the end of the day. I genuinely feared for my life today…

"Good morning, my love," Loki kissed my cheek. He was just coming back to bed.

"What did you do?" I went into instant worry.

"Nothing," he squeaked.

"You're never up before me, Loki…"

"And sometimes patterns are broken," he kissed my cheek, "Honestly, darling, you overthink things too much."

"Oh, son of a bitch!" I heard Clint practically choking in the kitchen.

I glared over at my mischievous fiancé with the dirty grin on his face. Before I could give him a chance to spin a tale for me, I got up and went into the kitchen to find Clint pouring an entire pitcher of orange juice down the sink, "Clint, what are you doing?"

"That wasn't orange juice," he gagged, "Someone thought it'd be hilarious to screw with my morning and switch the orange juice with macaroni and cheese mix and water."

"Oh, honey," I tried to hold back a giggle, "I'm sorry. I'll go get some while I'm out today."

"Don't worry about it," Clint brushed me off, "I'll take care of it."

"Clint," I stopped him, "Do you know what today is…?"

"Oh, shit…" It hit him like a ton of bricks, "We're screwed."

"Just be careful," I warned, "I have a feeling Loki has the whole place booby trapped."

"No," Clint shook his head, "Loki's craftier than that. We're all walking targets. He's got something set up for each of us. He knew I was going to go for the orange juice this morning, so I should probably be safe for the rest of the day. Watch your back."

"Loki wouldn't screw with me," I assumed, "He knows better than that."

"I wouldn't be too sure about that," he advised, "No one's safe."

I grabbed the faucet on the kitchen sink to fill up the coffee pot and sure enough, clear packing tape was wrapped around the sprayer, drenching me, "DAMMIT, LOKI! GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!"

"Ehehehe," I heard him laughing down the hall, "Yes?"

"Don't yes me!" I snapped. Followed by a loud air horn. And a thud, "Who was that?"

"Stark," Loki giggled, "Come on. It's my favorite day of the year. Let me have my fun."

"Who else have you gotten?" I growled.

"Thor's bedroom is filled with balloons," Loki told, "There's butter on Steve's floor. I put letter magnets on Bucky's arm that may or may not spell out kick me. That's it. That's all I've done."

"Hold on," Clint thought it over, "Why do Bruce and Natasha get spared?"

"Banner would probably reduce this place to rubble," Loki explained, "And Romanoff…I know better. Despite my immortality, she could probably dismantle me with her bare hands. And that would make for terrible wedding photos."

All I could do was shake my head. I wasn't sure if I loved him or hated him at this point, but never a dull moment. I knew that much…


	14. Chapter 14

Bright and early Monday morning, I got up, made my shower coffee, and gave Loki a kiss goodbye. I couldn't believe I was doing this, but between the Kilgrave flashbacks and the general stress of the job, maybe this was a good idea. If it's on company dime, there can't be much harm in going once, right? I'll be fine. I sat in the guy's office, playing with my phone, waiting for him to make an appearance.

"Good morning," a good looking, English man walked in, extending his hand to me, "I'm Dr. Donald Blake."

"You're my guy," I assumed.

"I am, indeed, your guy," he sat down. Dr. Donald Blake…Why did that sound familiar? And his bone structure looked kind of familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I had a nagging feeling in the back of my mind and it was driving me nuts. Shocker. I'm in a shrink's office for five minutes and I'm already catching the crazy, "Now, tell me about your last mission."

"Excuse me?" I choked on my water, "My last mission?"

"You can tell me," he assured, "You're not my first SHIELD agent I've spoken to. If I could put psychiatrist to the Avengers without Director Fury paying me a visit, I would."

I bit my tongue to keep my eyes in my head. This guy really was THE GUY. And if he was good enough for the others, I guess he'd be good enough for me. I held myself together, "Standard mission. Used my good looks to catch a terrible man. I was with him for about a month. Nothing too exciting."

"From what I understand," Dr. Blake assumed, "There were some exciting parts. If there weren't, why else would Fury have sent you to me?"

"You want exciting?" I scoffed, "Try meeting a man that you know is going to be a dick, but having to stick with him anyway. Not only that, but knowing he has superpowers that are supposed to control you, but they can't because you have a protective hold on you. But said dick can't know that, so you have to do everything and anything he says regardless."

"See?" he patted my shoulder, "It feels good to share, doesn't it?"

"No!" I went on, "My first night with Kilgrave, he tore a good white dress up and ruined bondage for me! I used to love being down to the bed, but now, I don't think I'd be able to stomach it! And almost every night after that, it was a constant stream of kinky sex for the next two weeks. All I wanted was to be able to sleep, but I couldn't. I wasn't allowed to sleep! And starving! Oh my God...This may sound stupid, but I never had such a craving for a cheeseburger in all my life. If I never eat Chinese food again, I'd be perfectly ok with that."

I felt tears running down my face. What was this? I was a stone wall. It was one of the main reasons I got chosen for the Kilgrave assignment. I had one hell of a poker face. Paired with the innocent baby face. He never would've suspected me. But here I was. Having a full on breakdown in Dr. Blake's office.

"This is very good," he wiped my cheek, "Go on."

I could barely speak above a whisper, "I've been dying inside for so long…"

"How long?"

"A few weeks," I figured, "It feels like an eternity."

"Let me ask you something," Dr. Blake put his notebook down, "Are you currently in a relationship?"

"Yes."

"And how's that going?"

"It's wonderful," I started to settle down at the mere thought of Loki. But my smile didn't last long, "Minus one little hiccup."

"Oh?"

"Oh," I nodded, "He…He wore a wire on me."

"Like a recording device?" the doctor asked.

"I thought we were past the point in our relationship where Fury wouldn't try using us against each other," I sighed, "But the worst part? It was Loki's idea. And that killed me worse than the actual act of it."

"Have you discussed it with him?"

"Not really," I shrugged, "I thought I could forgive and forget this kind of thing, but I guess not. This was two weeks ago and it's still bothering me. Then again, I hide practically everything from everyone."

"Maybe you should learn to open up to people," Dr. Blake suggested, "Starting with Loki. You have all these wonderful people in your life that I'm almost positive they'd be more than happy to help you if you're struggling."

"Easier said than done," I grumbled, "Considering the people closest to me are all screwed up in one way or another, too. They have too much on their plates. They don't need to add my problems on top of it."

"Like what?" he wondered.

"Well," I thought it over, "Just the other night, I had to help one of them with some serious PTSD induced insomnia. And I always do. Anytime that poor little angel is having problems sleeping, he always comes to me. Everyone comes to me. For everything."

"Maybe the weight of everyone else's problems is blocking you from seeing your own," he figured, "Or distracting you from your own, so you don't have to face them."

"I'd rather take care of them first."

"And there's your problem," Dr. Blake chimed, "You're so busy taking care of everyone else that you don't have time to take care of yourself. And you do need to do that from time to time. It's great that you've done so well, helping others. For a little while, why don't you only think of you? Take care of you for a change?"

"I don't know…"

"I think we've done enough," he stood, collecting his notes.

"Really?" I wondered, "That's it?"

"It was just a simple evaluation," Dr. Blake said, "Nothing too exciting."

"Do I need to come back?" I asked, having a feeling the answer was going to be yes. Obviously, I'm a little screwed up. And this guy struck me as the type that was going to milk SHIELD for every dime, so I might as well get something out of it.

"Do you think you need to come back…?"

That took me by surprise. But my own answer shocked me a little more, "I might…"

"I'm just a phone call away," he assured, "If life gets to be too much for you to handle, give me a call."

"What do you recommend I do while I'm not here?" I asked. Twenty bucks says he starts pill pushing.

"Go out," the doctor suggested, "Have a drink. Get a decent night's sleep. Start over in the morning. And I suggest staying away from that Kilgrave fellow."

"Thank you," I bowed out and headed home. That went better than I expected. I could've lived without the waterworks happening, but all in all, not a half bad experience. I didn't understand why I had been putting it off for so long. I know. Because I didn't want him to make me a drugged up zombie. And he didn't. But still. Dr. Donald Blake. Something about that name. I had heard it before or seen it before somewhere. I just couldn't figure out where.

Probably just overthinking. I popped a couple of aspirin and laid down for a while. The session with the good doctor was oddly draining. A nap, maybe? A nap would help. I shut my eyes for a moment or two and felt my entire body shut down in the best way. It brought me back to Antoine in the Virgin Islands. I missed him. He did as much good as what Dr. Blake did. And we didn't even have to talk much.

An arm snaked underneath me and around my top half. The sweet smell of cinnamon put a permanent smile on my face and I knew exactly who was cuddling me, "Hi, honey."

"Hello, darling," Loki kissed my cheek, "Where were you this morning?"

"I had a doctor appointment," I rolled into his embrace, "Did you not get that memo?"

"I guess not," he nuzzled his face into my neck, "Could I ask you a favor?"

"Sure, baby," I allowed, "What's up?"

"Would you care to go out with me this evening?" he asked.

"I'd love to," I nodded, "The doctor actually told me to go get a drink."

"Strange," Loki giggled, "Never heard of a doctor prescribing alcohol."

"Hey," I looked up at him, "Ever hear of a Dr. Donald Blake?"

"No," he thought it over, "I don't think so. Why?"

"He's my doctor," I told, "And I feel like I've heard the name before. Like I know him, but I don't know how I know him."

"No need to dwell on it," he brushed it off, "Now, I'm going to let you go back to your napping."

"Don't go," I begged, holding Loki down, "Please."

"Alright," he stayed, "I won't go anywhere."

"I need something to cuddle with," I spoke softly, "And pillows don't cut it like you do."

"That's because," Loki zapped his shirt off and pulled me against his chest, "your pillows will get too warm and you won't be able to sleep." 

"The perk of sleeping with a frost giant," I smiled, resting my hand on his cool, pale stomach.

"I'm glad you see my curse as your blessing," he pushed the hair out of my eyes, "At least some good can come from it."

"Hey," I stopped him, "Maybe you should come with me next time I see my guy. I'm sure he'd have a field day, playing in your head."

"SHIELD already tried that, sweetheart," Loki chuckled at the notion, "Wasn't a pretty sight. Not going to happen."

"Hold on," I sat up in bed, "SHIELD made you go through psych evaluations? The God of Lies and Mischief was forced to share his feelings with a doctor?"

"The tapes are lying around somewhere," he assumed, "My thoughts are my own business. Those tapes are practically fabricated from the word go. Once they realized I wasn't taking them too seriously, they just gave up. Fury thought it'd be simpler to get me a handler instead."

"And the rest is history…"

"Precisely," Loki gave me a little kiss, "I love you."

"I love you, too, baby," I cuddled, "Who knows what they would've done if you would've been honest with them?"

"Padded room. Guarantee it."

"I know the feeling," I let out a heavy sigh, "My doctor was barely scratching the surface. I thought I had a decent handle on things until he started pushing. And the more he pushed, the more that came out."

"How much leaked out?" Loki worried.

"The only thing that leaked was my eyes for a minute," I chuckled, "He dug in the Kilgrave files in my brain and it got dark for a while. I tried playing it off like everything was fine."

"It's not," Loki couldn't look at me, "I've seen it firsthand that things aren't good with you. I know it's going to be hard for you, my dearest, but I really want you to open up to this doctor."

"I feel like I can," I admitted, "For some reason, he reminds me of you."

"You better not be running off with the doctor, darling," he held me closer, kissing down my neck, "Remember who you come home to at the end of the day."

"Like I could ever forget," I nuzzled into his shoulder, "I couldn't get rid of you if I wanted to."

"No matter what I do?" a little smirk graced Loki's face.

"No matter what you do."

"Even if I were to attempt what I did in New York again?" he tested me, "Of my own volition?"

"Loki," I scolded, "You know better."

"Merely playing up the silver tongue," he promised, "I wouldn't try to take over Earth again. I promise."

"Pinky promise?"

"I will never understand the concept of pinky promises," Loki rolled his eyes, giving me his pinky, "But yes. I pinky promise."

"Actually," I explained, "The origin of the pinky promise? When someone didn't keep their promise, the other person had every and all legal right to cut off and steal that person's pinky."

"A bit morbid, don't you think?"

"That probably hasn't been done in years," I assured, getting out of bed, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a date tonight and I need to go get ready."

"But you're beautiful just the way you are," Loki sang after me.

"I know," I smirked, "But I need to make myself better."

"Alright," he let me go, "Go on."

I threw myself in our closet and dug around for something to wear tonight. Knowing Loki, we weren't going somewhere simple. Loki never did simple. So, I wouldn't do simple. I took out a short red dress and some gold coordinates and headed into the bathroom. This was needed. This was sorely needed. A night out with Loki. Just what the doctor ordered.

 **A/N: So. The guy. Dr. Donald Blake. Where have we heard that before…? Well, kids. I have an unfortunate announcement. And this goes for all my current works in progress. I'm taking hiatus…I'm sick, I'm miserable, and I need to do me for a while. I don't know when I'll be back. I could be back next week. I could be back next month. I don't know. My health likes to play tricks on me. I'm not leaving you. I promise. But this whole being sick thing as seriously thrown me off. When I'm not sick, I'll write little pieces of chapters throughout the week and hammer the rest out on update day. I've been writing some long, meaty chapters in one day and it's gotten exhausting. So, I'm going to do me for a while and hopefully, I'll be back soon. Please don't leave me. I love you. And I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Warning. The following chapter contains naughty naked cuddle time.**

I will never understand why Loki insisted on ridiculously nice restaurants. I was never the ridiculously nice restaurant type. He and I were past the point in our relationship where he didn't have to try and impress me anymore. I wouldn't say no, though. If it made Loki happy, it made me happy.

"So," I played with the straw in my drink, "My doctor told me something interesting today."

"Really?" Loki asked, "I don't really believe in psychiatrists, but if they can help you. What did he tell you?"

"He said I should open up more," I told, "And if I'm going to do it in baby steps, I should start with you."

"Sounds like a smart man," Loki grinned, "Is there anything you'd like to tell me? Something on your mind? It's just you and me. I'm not wearing a wire and we weren't followed."

"That's the thing," I sighed, "I'm not ok. And I haven't been ok for a while. The feeling I had during our time in the Virgin Islands was the first time I had been even in the least bit happy in a long time. Kilgrave broke me, Loki. He took who I used to be, tore it up, and put out an empty shell. That's why I was so surprised at your proposal. I didn't think you'd want me anymore."

"No," Loki took my hand, "No, no, no, my love. You may be broken, but I promise you. I'm not leaving. I swear on my life that I will fix you or die trying. Kilgrave is just a minor setback. We'll get through this, darling. Together."

Tears started rolling down my cheeks, "No matter how bad I get, you won't leave me?"

"Never," he wiped my eyes, "You and me."

"Thank you, Loki," I sniveled, "I needed to hear you say that. I don't need for you to understand. I just need you to fix me."

"I love you," he kissed the back of my hand.

"I love you, too," I smiled, "And I miss you."

"How can you miss me, sweetheart?" Loki wondered, "I'm always by your side."

"I..." I started to change color, "I want to try something."

"Anything you want."

"Well..." I began, "I want to please you again, my king."

"Do you now?" a dirty smirk hit Loki's face like a Mack truck.

"Yes," I nodded, "It's been too long since we've been close."

"Alright," Loki got up, "Shall we return to the tower then, my dearest?"

"Yes, please."

Oh, how I missed this. Being Loki's girl. Being close with him. His skin on mine. His skin turning a little blue whenever I'd get him just the right amount of riled up.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Loki worried, "You remember the last time we tried this."

"I know," I shook it off, "It's different this time. I've had more time to process. I'll be ok."

"Alright," he allowed, "We can do this on one condition."

"Where are you going with this, Loki?"

"I know how eager you are to please your king," Loki kissed just under my ear, "But a king is nothing without his queen…"

I squirmed under his touch, "Please, Loki. I want to take care of you."

"And the only way you can do that," Loki teased me some more, "is if I can take care of you."

"Alright," I caved, "If the only way to please you is for you to please me, I guess I have no other choice."

"Good," he held me close, "Now, you're sure we can do this? I don't want you having Kilgrave flashbacks again."

"I won't," I promised.

"Alright…"

Loki started taking his own clothes off before he got to mine. And when he took mine off, I could hardly feel it. Normally, the faster Loki could peel my clothes off, the better. He didn't care about the collateral damage. What could I say? My little demigod liked to play rough.

Tonight? Tonight was a different story.

Loki used his magic to duplicate himself. Before I knew it, I had a Loki on my top half, a Loki on my bottom half, and a Loki in the middle. I guess he really was out to please me. Bottom half Loki's face was buried between my legs, kissing up my thighs before he reached my DEAR GOD…I knew he was a duplicate of Loki, but I didn't know he'd have Loki's skillset, too.

Top half Loki massaged my shoulders and kneaded my boobs in the way that only real Loki could. Or so I thought. My king wanted me to feel like his queen again. And this was definitely making me feel like his queen. I haven't been this elated, this blissful, in what felt like an eternity.

"Alright, boys," Loki withdrew his duplicates, "Can't have you coming for anyone but me, can we?"

Here we go. Here's my rough, forceful, take no prisoners demigod that I fell in love with all those years ago, "Please, my love. Take me."

"With pleasure," Loki put me on his lap and started grinding into me. But soft and slow. What the hell? Not that this wasn't making me see the alignment of the nine realms, but it wasn't what I was used to. Usually, Loki would be slamming into me as hard as he could, bringing me to the verge of tears, fully aware about my pain kink.

But this was a different side to my demigod that I had never seen before. I didn't know Loki had it in him to be such a gentle lover. I coaxed him to go a little faster and dug my nails into his back. I wanted rough and mean and physical. I didn't want soft and gentle.

"Loki," I growled in his ear, "I told you I wanted you to take me. Now, take me, dammit!"

With his ego bruised, Loki threw me down onto the bed, pinning my hands above my head, "I wanted you to feel loved, my dear. I wanted you to feel sweet, gentle pleasure in the way only I can give you. You want the monster, darling, I will give you the monster."

And did I get the monster. Loki's grind grew quicker and harder, making my heart race. His teeth sank into my chest and my shoulders and into my neck. There he was. There was my monster. He even started reverting to his Jotun form. I bit down in his shoulder to muffle my screams as my entire body erupted from every single pore.

"Thank you, my king," I sighed out, completely out of breath, "I needed that."

"I'm just glad you kept your head about you," Loki pulled me against his ice cold chest, "I didn't want to bring on a flashback."

"I know," I cuddled into his ribs, "And I appreciate it, but when I want you to take me, take me. We'll never know unless we try."

"True," Loki kissed my forehead, "Now, get some sleep, alright?"

"Ok," I yawned, "Good night, Loki."

"Good night, my queen," he held me tight, "I love you."

"I love you, too…" As soon as I shut my eyes, my brain turned off and I drifted into a sweet, well deserved slumber.

The next morning, I woke up to Loki still out cold next to me with his arms around my waist. Surprise, surprise. I slipped out of his arms as gently as I could and made my way into the bathroom. As soon as I turned on the light and caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror, I jumped at my own reflection. Sure enough, deep splotches of red and purple peppered the top of my chest and up my neck. Jesus, Loki. I'm marrying a demigod, not a leech.

Oh, well. This is why we have turtlenecks, right? I got dressed and went out to check on the others. It was kind of late in the morning. Then again, sex with Loki always took a lot out of me. I was guaranteed twelve hours of sleep. Maybe even more, depending on how it went.

"Morning, doll," Bucky greeted me, standing at the island in the kitchen.

"Morning," I rubbed my eyes, looking for a coffee cup.

"No," Tony chimed in, "No. Turtle. No. No. Not allowed."

"What?" I squeaked, "I'm not allowed to wear a turtleneck now?"

"Not when it's seventy degrees outside," he fought, "No. I'm not allowing it. Take it off."

"Tony," Steve broke it up, "Leave the girl alone."

I was already sweating. I wasn't going to be able to handle wearing this all day. Might as well take the ten minutes of ridicule over the all-day of sweltering. And I had a tank top on under it, "Fine. If it's so terrible for me to have a turtleneck…"

I peeled off my top layer, revealing the dozen or so hickeys I had tried to hide underneath. And no shock to anyone else in the room, Tony couldn't keep his mouth shut, "My God. Loki, you dog…Someone was busy last night."

"Yes, she was," I confirmed.

"Do you have anywhere to go today?" Tony asked.

"I don't know," I shrugged, "It's my last day on vacation. I don't know if Loki has something planned."

"Alright," Tony went to the fridge, "Here. Instead of asking for the nitty-gritty details, I'm going to be a nice guy and help you out."

"Really?" I gave him a look, "Thanks, Tony. What's the occasion?"

"Be careful," Steve warned, "There's strings. I can tell."

"No strings," Tony promised, wrapping a couple ice cubes in a washcloth, "Keep this on your neck for ten minutes. They should almost be nonexistent. At least, they'll be easier to cover up."

"You're a lifesaver," I thanked, pushing the ice against my skin, "I don't know why I'm not using Loki for this."

"I thought it was an unwritten rule," Tony assumed, "We can't use Loki as our own personal ice cube."

"I'm his fiancée," I reminded him, "Any rules pertaining to Loki don't pertain to me."

"There's also a rule against using my arm as a bulletin board, Stark," Bucky pointed out, "That doesn't stop you."

"I make your arms, thank you very much," Tony reminded.

"And some of the extra settings aren't appreciated…" he growled.

"I thought the vibrate feature would've been a good idea!"

"It wasn't! Neither was having a remote to control it!"

"That was a fun week…"

"You wouldn't tell me where the remote was!"

"Boys," I stepped in, "Play nice."

"Sorry, Mom," Tony teased, "Hey, when you and Loki get married, do I have to call him Dad?"

"Tony," I gave him a blank stare, "I barely like it when you call me Mom. Why would I want you calling Loki Dad?"

"Good," he jumped up onto the counter, "I wasn't going to."

This was my life…

 **A/N: Hi, guys! I'm sorry. I'm kind of rusty on my smut writing. I haven't written anything dirty in ages. Not since the Favor and the Fever in the Black Butler fic. And that was a couple months ago. I need to brush up again…Anyway, I'll see you next chapter! xx**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hi, guys! Now, there's going to be a music recommendation in this chapter. For the full effect, I highly suggest you turn the song on while reading it and use headphones. It will be a magical experience, I promise.**

Damn, he was adorable when he was sleeping. I nuzzled my face into my fiancé's chest, "Good morning, Loki…"

Almost instinctively, Loki's embrace tightened around me, "Good morning, darling…Dear God, what happened to your neck?"

"Really?" I gave him a look, "You had to ask? You did this, you moron."

"I know," he smirked, "I just wanted to hear you say it. Although, calling me a moron was unappreciated."

"Loki," I grumbled, "You're such a dick."

"And you could've said no," he reminded, "Now, are we done pointing out the obvious? You know you love me."

"Not even married yet," I rolled my eyes, "And I already wanted a divorce."

"No, you don't," Loki held me closer, "You love me too much and you know I wouldn't let you go without a fight."

"You're right," I sighed out, "I hate when that happens."

"I find it rather entertaining."

"Speaking of entertaining," I sat up, "I'm going to go do some aerials. Care to join me?"

"I can watch?" he chirped, sharing in my enthusiasm.

"Yes," I assured, "Before I change my mind."

"Alright," Loki jumped out of bed, "I'd love to. Are you going down to the training room now?"

"I am," I poked my head out of our bedroom, "Hey, Tony?"

"Yeah, sweetheart?" Tony yelled back.

"Did you do that little update to the security system like I asked you to?"

"I sure did."

"Thank you!" I beamed.

"Was that necessary?" Loki whined.

"Completely," I took Loki's hand and the two of us headed down to the training room, "If I want to be alone, I'm going to be alone. Whether you like it or not."

"Fine," he pouted.

"Could you do me a favor?" I asked as we approached the door for the restricted area.

"Of course, darling. What do you need?"

"Will you shape shift into me?" I requested, "I know it weirds me out, but I just want to see if Tony actually did it."

"Sure," Loki became me before my eyes. Still made me cringe a little bit. It was like looking in a funhouse mirror and I didn't like it, "Now, what did you want me to do?"

Even hearing my own voice back at me was like nails on a chalkboard, "Put your hand on the scanner."

"Ok," Loki did as I asked…or I did as I asked…or…Yeah. Sure enough, the door wouldn't open, "It's not working."

"Now, change back," I begged, putting my hand on the scanner, "I can't take this anymore. It's making my skin crawl."

"Is this better?" Loki shifted into his brother, "More noble?"

"Loki," I shook my head, "No. I told you. I want you, not Thor. Come on. We've had this conversation."

"Fine," he shifted again. This time to someone else, "Maybe this form pleases you a little more?"

"Dammit, Loki," I snapped, "No. You don't need to be Steve either."

"Maybe…"

"I swear to God, if your next form isn't you, I'm going to kick the shit out of you."

"Alright," Loki turned back into himself, "Just having a little fun. Is that too much to ask?"

"Any requests?" I strapped myself into the harness.

He thought it over for a moment, "Something graceful."

"Loki," I took my first initial jumps, gaining a little momentum, "You know me better than that. Since when do I ever do graceful?"

"You can do it," he grabbed me, stealing a kiss, "I know you can if you try."

"I guess I could try," I pulled away, regaining my speed, "JARVIS?"

"Yes, Miss?" he chimed in.

"Could you give me the music box version of Swim by Jack's Mannequin please?" I asked.

"Of course, Miss."

The light bleeps and bloops of the song began, putting me completely at peace. Instead of the higher octane performance I gave Loki last time I was in here, I became an absolute swan. I couldn't have been more graceful. I had found my center. And couldn't have been more content. I flipped and soared through the air, almost feeling like I was flying.

As soon as the song ended, I fell into my fiancé's arms. If he wasn't holding me down, I probably would've floated away, "That was beautiful, my love."

"You know," I thought, "I should hook you up to a harness and send you flying."

"Now, why would you do that?" he buried his face in my neck, "I couldn't even begin to dream of myself doing what you do."

"I am kind of the best," I squirmed.

"JARVIS?" Loki called out.

"Yes, Loki?"

"Could you give me 'It's Love, Isn't It?' please?"

"Yes, sir."

"What's this all about?" I wondered as the music started.

"What?" Loki took my hand, spinning me around, "I can't dance with the woman I love?"

"I didn't even know you could, to be honest," I shrugged.

"You had your upbringing," he pulled me close to him, "I had mine. Adopted or not, darling, I'm still of royal blood."

"Oh?" I wondered.

"You do know that I am not of Asgard," he told, "Right?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "You're Jotun. You're a frost giant. You're not the son of Odin."

"My biological father," Loki explained, dipping me, "was the King of Jotunheim. Therefore, being his biological son, I am royal."

"Does that make me your princess?" I teased.

"Oh, darling," he kissed the back of my hand, "Regardless of where we are, you will always be my queen."

"You know," I rested my head on Loki's shoulder while the song came to a close, "It's my last day of vacation."

"Yes," Loki's arms wrapped around my waist, "What about it?"

"What should we do?" I wondered.

"Whatever you'd like," Loki offered, "It's yours."

"Honestly," I collapsed onto the floor, "I just want to hang around the tower, if it's alright with you. We've been going nonstop since I came home. I need a lazy day of doing absolutely nothing."

"That's fine with me," he knelt down to my level, "We can do that. And there's a showing of Titanic tonight in Central Park. Thoughts?"

"Sure," I agreed, "I'm in."

"As for the rest of our day," Loki kissed my cheek, "Where shall we start?"

"I'm going to start with a shower," I unhooked my harness, "You're free to do as you wish until I come out."

"Or maybe I could join you?" he wondered.

"Not yet," I shot him down, "I don't even know if I'd want you in the same room."

"One day," Loki assured, "One day, your head will be back to the way it was. Before the K word came into your life. Everything will be ok."

"Your sentiment is appreciated," I pushed myself up, "But I'm pretty sure I'll never be who I was before this mission. I'll just get a little better at a time."

"You never know," Loki called after me, "Maybe that doctor of yours could work a miracle."

Maybe he could. I've only been once. Maybe I should go back again. Next day off, maybe? Maybe Dr. Blake could work miracles. A girl could hope, right? I prayed for the day when I could be good again. Honestly, the day was rapidly approaching. I mean, I functioned. I got to have sex with Loki again without losing my shit about it. And that was after my first trip to see the good doctor. Maybe he does work miracles.

All clean and not smelling of sweat, I made my way back home. By the looks of things, the others had the same thing in mind that I did. Nothing could beat lazy Sundays in the tower. Usually, I would've found Steve on the balcony with his sketchbook, but instead, he was on the couch with a Wii controller in his hands.

"Hey, Steve," I sat next to him, "What are you doing?"

"Going for a drive," he said, his eyes glued to the screen.

"In Mario Kart?" I giggled, "You take to Toad's Turnpike when you want to go for a drive?"

"It's kind of relaxing," Steve admitted, "Watching the twists and turns of the road go by."

Steve had gotten pretty good at Mario Kart since I had been here. He stuck with the classics. Always raced as Mario. Always in the standard bike. However, no one dared to actually race him. No one wanted to crush his spirit.

"Mind if I join you?" I asked, taking out a controller of my own.

"Not at all," he beamed, "Finally. Someone'll play me."

"Careful, Steve," Natasha warned, not looking up from her magazine, "She'll hustle the hell out of you."

"I'm sure I can take her," Steve brushed her off, "Care to put a wager on it?"

"Ten bucks?" I shrugged.

"Deal," he shook my hand.

"You got her, Steve," Bucky cheered behind us.

"No offense, Cap," Tony chimed in, "I'm almost positive that the kid's going to wipe the floor with you. Mind if I get in on that bet?"

"I want in, too," Clint jumped down from the rafters, "This looks like it could get interesting."

"Me, too," Bruce joined in, "I'll throw ten in on Steve."

"Place your bets!" Tony played the bookie, "Two to one odds. Steve's going down."

"Give me ten on Steve," Clint bet.

"Give me ten on her," Natasha chimed in.

"Thanks, Clint," Steve said, "Good to know you're betting on the sure thing."

"I'll do ten on Steve," Bucky threw his money down, "I've watched you play. I know how good you are."

"Thanks, Buck."

"What's going on?" Loki came in with Thor on his hip.

"Your girlfriend and the Captain are playing MK8," Tony filled him in, "Care to place a wager?"

"Not particularly," Loki sat next to me.

"Thor?" Tony asked, "You want in?"

"No, thank you," Thor shot him down.

"Where are we racing, Steve?" I wondered.

"I'll let you pick," he offered, "The least I can do is be a gentleman about this. And no hard feelings when I win, right?"

"Your cockiness will be your downfall, old man," I teased.

"Alright," Steve accepted my challenge, "What's the hardest track in the game?"

"Rainbow Road," everyone droned simultaneously.

"Ok," he scrolled down to the new Rainbow Road.

"I like this track," Thor grinned, "It reminds me of home."

"Rub it in," Loki grumbled under his breath.

"Hey," I shoved my finger in his face, "I don't want to hear it."

"Good luck," Steve wished, "You're going to need it."

"Uh-huh," I nodded in disbelief.

And the race began. Damn…Steve was good. Better than I thought. I tried just about everything and I kept falling behind. Banana peels, bob-ombs. Hell, I managed to get an invincibility star and I couldn't get past him! Fortunately for me, just as we were rounding the end of the last lap, I got my savior…

"What's that…?" Steve worried, "What is floating above me…?"

"You've never had the blue shell, have you, Steve?"

"What's the…" BOOM! I speeded past him, taking first, and won the race, "That was cheap."

"All's fair in love and war, sweetie," I smirked, "I told you. Your cockiness will be your downfall."

"Rematch?" Steve demanded.

Knock, knock.

"How about you get the door instead?" I directed.

"Fine…" he pouted, jumping up to his feet. Steve got the door while I rode out my post win high.

"Pay up, Stark," I insisted, "I believe you owe some of us money."

"Ma'am," Steve answered, "Are you supposed to be up here?"

"Oh…" a familiar voice chimed, "Hello, Captain."

"I don't think you're supposed to be up here," he figured while Tony divvied up mine and Nat's winnings, "You must have gotten lost. Let me show you back downstairs."

"Oh, shit…" I mumbled to myself, "Loki…We've been found."

"Is that…?" Loki shared in my sentiment.

"Mother…?" I treaded lightly.

"Hi, honey!" my spastic mother came barreling in, squeezing me as tight as she could, "Finally, I get to see where you live!"

"What are you doing here?" I asked nervously.

"I was looking for Phil," she explained, "Aren't you going to introduce me…?"

"Fine," I let out a heavy, defeated, exasperated sigh, "Guys, my mother, Charlotte. Mom, you've already met Steve."

"Yeah," Steve smiled uncomfortably as my mother eyed him up like a lollipop.

I started clockwise, "That's Bucky. And Clint. And Natasha. Bruce, Tony…"

"Milf," Tony growled to himself, "Milf. Milf."

"Tony!" I threw my shoe at him and continued, "Then, that's Thor and you and Loki have already met."

"Hello, Charlotte," Loki smiled, taking my mother's hands, "How are you?"

"Hi, Loki," she beamed. Until Thor caught her eye, "Hello…"

"Lady Charlotte," Thor bowed to her.

"Oh, my," Mom blushed instantly, "You can just call me Charlotte, sweetheart."

"Alright then."

"So," she wrapped around my future brother-in-law's arm, "Tell me, Thor. How much do you bench?"

"Mother," I growled, "Didn't you say you were looking for Coulson?"

"What would you be looking for Coulson for?" Clint wondered.

"He and I were supposed to meet up tonight," Mom told, "Any idea where he could be?"

"Did you try his office?" I suggested, "Or maybe Fury's office?"

"He wasn't there," she sighed, throwing herself on the couch, "So, do you hang out here all the time?"

I couldn't handle it anymore. I had a vein sticking out of my forehead. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom dearly, but sometimes, she could be kind of a pain in the ass. This was the precise reason why I didn't want her coming here. I knew this would happen. I would become the little kid on the playground that didn't want their mom to show up and embarrass them in front of their friends. And I knew right away what was going to happen once she leaves.

"I know where Agent Coulson is, Charlotte," Loki chimed in, "I'll show you."

"Thank you, Loki," Mom smiled, kissing my cheek, "I'll see you later, baby."

"Bye, Mom," I turned a bright shade of red.

"I'll be right back," Loki copied her, resting his ice cold Jotun hand on my face, "I love you."

"I love you, too," I buried my face in his chest, "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

Amazing how Loki had the ability to settle me down. My mother and my fiancé went off to find my superior and, just as I suspected, all eyes were turned toward me, "What?"

"Why haven't you introduced us to your mom before?" Clint asked.

"Haven't gotten around to it," I defended.

"You've been with us for three years."

"I've had other things to take care of," I pointed out, "Like you guys!"

"And why is she meeting with Coulson?" Tony had a dirty smirk on his face that I just wanted to punch into next week.

"Coulson gives her regular updates about me," I told, "And it turned into something a little more than just that."

"I knew it!" Tony chirped, "Your mom's doing Coulson, isn't she?"

"Dammit, Tony!" I lunged at him, but Thor caught me in midair, arms and legs flailing and all, "Thor, let me go!"

"If I do, you'll kill him," he put it into perspective.

"That's the point!"

"I see I hit a sensitive area," Tony cringed, "Sorry about that, sweetheart. From the bottom of my glowing heart."

I started to settle down a little, "There were a million and one better ways you could've asked that, Tony, and you know it."

"But it's true, isn't it?"

"It's the last thing I want to think about," I shook off the very thought, my body relaxing in Thor's embrace, "But yes. Coulson's seeing my mother. I'm not happy about it, but it's not my call."

"Well then," Bruce broke the uncomfortable silence, "This seems like it'd be fun to stick around for, but I think I'll be going now."

"Ditto," Clint got up.

"If you need me," Bruce called behind him, "I'll be on the roof."

"If you need me," I wiggled my way out of Thor's massive pipes, "I'll be in my room."

I went into my room, shut the door, and threw myself on my bed. I needed to decompress. Fortunately, I'm smart. I opened the small drawer in my nightstand and took out a little bottle of scotch. I still had a hard time making eye contact with Coulson in passing. My mother could have the hiccups and it'd drive me nuts. I about drove one of my best friends into a wall just for asking about it. A part of me gave serious consideration to calling Dr. Blake for an emergency session, but his office hours ended at five and it was knocking on seven.

"Are you ready, darling?" Loki came in, snuggling his face into my shoulder blades.

"Yes," I sighed out, "God, yes."

"Come on," he took my hand, "You. Me. Titanic in Central Park."

The two of us left the others behind, along with the unpleasantness that had just happened. The cool night air over the city on my skin. The man I was head over heels for. A sappy tragedy. And a bottle of merlot. What could be better?

"Do you think someone seriously resisted the urge to push him off?"

"Loki!" I shoved him, "Do you mind?"

And the thing is, he was like this through the entire movie!

"You know, my love," Loki whispered to me, "I could draw you like one of my French girls…"

"Shut up," I giggled, laying my head in his lap.

"They both could have easily fit on the door…"

"Loki!" I snapped, tears in my eyes, "You've sat and nitpicked the entire movie."

"I'm just saying," he defended himself, "It has its flaws."

And as much as I wanted to dropkick him in the throat, I couldn't have been more thankful for him. Loki took care of my mother for me. He's taken care of me since I got home. Loki is my angel and I wouldn't trade him for the world.

 **A/N: Hi, guys! I have been so on the ball lately that I've made the executive decision to add yet ANOTHER story to the roster. That'll be out on Mondays. So, if I'm doing the math right here, I have a full week. The new one on Monday, Ouran on Tuesday, Black Butler (WHICH IS COMING BACK THIS WEEK) on Wednesday, Fullmetal Alchemist on Thursday, and this guy on Friday. Good gravy, I'm an overachiever. And things are about to get kind of serious in this particular story…I won't go into details yet because…well…spoilers. But you'll see! Anyway, I'll see you next chapter! xx**


	17. Chapter 17

Finally. Time go get back to work. The old grindstone. This whole sitting around shit sucks. I know Fury meant well and God knows I needed the vacation, but I may have taken too much time. Especially with the price I had to pay for it. It felt so damn good to be back. And fortunately for me, I got to spend some quality time with my new BFF and the asshole that brought us together.

"You up for some torture?" Jessica asked as we took the elevator down to max.

"Always," I scoffed, "Especially when it comes to Kilgrave. Come on, Jessica. I'm surprised you even had to ask."

"Are you sure you should be doing this?" she worried, "I understand if you want to stay behind while I take care of him."

"And let you have all the fun?" a dirty little smirk stretched across my face that even Loki would be proud of, "No way. I'm good, Jess. Don't worry about me. If I get too bad, I'll make an appointment with the good doctor and call it a day."

"You got a shrink?" Jessica gave me a look, "When did this happen?"

"Fury made me get a psych evaluation after I came back," I explained, "Standard protocol. I couldn't weasel my way out of it if I wanted to. And the guy I'm seeing told me that if I ever needed to come back to give him a call."

"Well, well," a familiar, bone chilling voice spoke so soft and gentle, "Look who we have here. The two bitches that single handedly broke my heart."

"Hi, Kilgrave," I smiled big, sitting on his lap, "I missed you."

"Bullshit, you did," Kilgrave quivered, "Last time we saw each other, you treated me like your punching bag!"

"That was you?" Jessica gasped, recalling the time she came down with Loki and the medical team told her no beating. But the stitches I put in her knuckles told another tale.

"Yep," I sighed nostalgically, "Good times."

"And why did you kick the shit out of Kilgrave?" Jessica wondered, "Other than the obvious."

"I found a wire on my man," I remembered, "And he's too beautiful for me to drive my fist in his face, so Kilgrave was the next best thing."

"So, because your boyfriend's screw up," Kilgrave snarled, "I had to take the punishment for it?"

"Hey, Jessica," I asked, "Could you give the two of us a moment alone, please?"

"Don't do it, Jessica!" Kilgrave begged, tears in his eyes, "Please! Last time, she almost crippled me! Please don't leave me alone with her!"

Jessica thought it over for a minute or two, shooting glances between him and me, "Don't cripple him."

"I will," I smiled sweetly, "I promise."

"Jessica, no!" he wept, "Don't go!"

"Play nice, kids," Jessica shut the door behind her and drew the curtains for me. Bless her.

"Hi, sweetheart," I rested my head on his shoulder, "Oh, how I missed you."

"I'm sure you did, darling." Oh, shit…He's back, "And do I have some fun things for us to do."

"Remember, Kilgrave," I jumped on the defense, "I can break you. I have broken you."

"And by the sounds of things," he grinned, "I've broken you. I can see it in your eyes. The same, blank, vacant stare Jessica has. Do you have the hero complex, too?"

"What do you want?" I growled, already annoyed with him.

"More comfortable accommodations, for starters," Kilgrave wrapped his arms around my waist, "You know, despite the fact you're a huge bitch in my eyes now, I kind of did miss you. I missed this."

"What?" I snapped, "You mentally and emotionally torturing me, day in and day out? Making me uncomfortable on a regular basis?"

"Holding you close like this," he cradled me in his arms, "Can I ask you something?"

"I guess," I rolled my eyes, "What?"

"Do you know what Fury wants with me?" Kilgrave asked, "When the dust has settled, do you know his plans?"

"None of my business," I brushed him off, wiggling out of his embrace.

"Oh, it will be," he beamed, "He's hiring a new handler. Kind of like you."

"Ok," I gave Kilgrave a look, "Good for him. Do I give him a cookie or a medal?"

"The sarcasm," he chuckled darkly, "I forgot about the bitter sarcasm. It's one of Jessica's defense mechanisms, too. Do you know why he gave you as much vacation time as what he did?"

"I think we're done here."

"Because you would've gotten in the way," Kilgrave went on, trying to get in my head, "The handler's for me. My power is far too useful to dispose of me. I might be a twisted son of a bitch, but deep down, Fury saw an asset."

"No way," I mumbled to myself. There was no way in hell Fury was allowing this.

"Yes," his face lit up like a Christmas tree, "I'm going to be a SHIELD agent, too! We're going to be coworkers! He told me it's worked before. Turning the bad guy into the good guy. And I'm not a bad guy. You told me so yourself."

"Bullshit," I called, my blood boiling for him even putting himself in the same category as Loki. Where did he get off? Loki was being controlled. Kilgrave was the one doing the controlling, "You're not joining SHIELD."

"That's just what Fury told me," Kilgrave shrugged, "Don't shoot the messenger."

"Why should I believe you?" I sat against the wall on the floor, "Why should I believe anything that comes out of your mouth?"

"Because," Kilgrave sat next to me, draping his arm around my shoulders. I winced at his touch, "I've never lied to you, darling. I have no reason to…Now, Fury, on the other hand…How well do you really know him?"

"We're done here," I shoved him off me and stood up. Every fiber of my being told me to drive that asshole into the wall. And it took a tremendous amount of strength not to do it, but I shut the door to his cell and found his other victim pacing the hall.

"Hey," I caught her eye, "Are you alright?"

"Fine," I lied, "Go play, Jessica. Have at it."

"Alright," she let it go. Jessica knew there wasn't something right with me. I'm guessing she's probably seen all the signs of Kilgrave raising hell in someone's head. And something tells me that when she sees them, she's generally looking in a mirror.

"My head hurts," I told her, "I'm going up to the tower to lay down for a little while. If anyone asks."

"Go ahead," Jessica insisted, "I know what it's like to have that dick in your head. Go lay down. Take a nap. Have a drink. Function again."

"I like your philosophy," I giggled a little, "See you later, Jess. Enjoy the beating."

"I will!"

I left Jessica to beat on Kilgrave for a while and started heading up to the tower. I hated that Kilgrave got to me. I wonder how much truth was there. There was no way Fury was keeping him around to use him as a consultant of sorts. Definitely not as a field agent. There's too much risk.

Then again…He thought the same thing about Loki for a while, too. A lot of mistrust between the two of them. And now, they can manage to be in the same room. There wouldn't be a handler that could handle Kilgrave. That's next to impossible. He'd be able to control them at the drop of a hat. Kilgrave had to have been lying to me.

As soon as I got in, I snuck into my bedroom and scrolled through my contacts on my phone. I stared heavily at the B's. For Blake, Dr. Donald. Dare I make an appointment? I mean, I did just hold a conversation with my biggest X factor. The source of all my emotional trauma. And he got to me. I was compromised. I didn't like to admit it, but I was.

No. I threw my phone back on the nightstand. All I needed was a twenty minute nap and a drink. I didn't need Dr. Blake. I could get through this on my own. I'll be alright. I still couldn't help but wonder…

What did Fury want with Kilgrave?

 **A/N: Hi, guys! I must admit, I left it on one hell of a cliffhanger, if I do say so myself. *pats self on the back* And can we talk about how adorable the initial interaction with Kilgrave is? She's kind of giving him a little middle finger by being so sweet with him. Loved it. See you next chapter, guys! xx**


	18. Chapter 18

"Donald Blake," the other end of my phone barked back at me.

"Hi, Dr. Blake," I answered, "Do you have any openings today?"

"I do," I could hear his appointment book pages turning in the background, "Do you need to come in?"

"I think so," I thought it over. After my trip down to the detention level, I have been a bit off. Seeing Dr. Blake might actually help.

"Come in," he allowed, "Say, four o'clock?"

"That works," I looked over at my alarm clock. Forty-five minutes to get across town? I could do that, "I'll see you then."

"Bye!"

Click.

I didn't think Kilgrave would've gotten to me to this bad, but what he said really bugged me. It wouldn't surprise me if Fury would bring someone on with incredible abilities, but Kilgrave? Of all people, Kilgrave? He saw how much that dick has screwed me up. And Fury loves me. He wouldn't do something stupid like hire Kilgrave on…Right?

"Hello, darling," Loki's icy hands snaked up the front of my body from behind, "Guess who?"

I couldn't help but smile a little, taking his hands off my boobs and entwining my fingers in his, "The only person that can get away with doing that sober without my fiancé killing them. Or me, for that matter."

"Are you alright?" he worried, "I just ran into Jessica coming out of the detention level on her way out and she told me you went with her to see Kilgrave."

"I'm fine," I shrugged him off, "I'm actually on my way to a follow up with my head doctor now."

"And you're sure you're ok?" Loki's embrace tightened.

"We'll talk when I get back," I promised, "Until then, I need to go see my doctor."

"Alright, my love," Loki gave me a kiss, "I'll be looking forward to it."

I left Loki at the tower unsupervised (He's a damn grown up. I can leave the kids at home by themselves now. Especially when their replacement nanny is just downstairs.) and took off to Dr. Blake's office. Loki did say the man could work miracles. I mean, I haven't had a Kilgrave flashback in a while. I could have sex with my fiancé without hyperventilating. Dr. Blake is magic.

"Hello, my dear," he opened the door to his office, "Pleasure to see you again. Apologies for the circumstances."

"You know," I chuckled, "Sometimes, when you speak, you remind me a lot of my fiancé."

"Loki?" Dr. Blake assumed.

"Yeah," I smiled, my heart radiating an internal warmth.

"I can assure you I'm not Loki," he promised as we both sat down, "Now, how are you doing? What brings us here today?"

"I went back to work this morning," I began.

"Good," he chimed, "And how did that go?"

"I visited my X factor," I cringed, "I think that may have been a little bit of a mistake."

"When we see X factors," Dr. Blake explained, "Usually, those are things to avoid. Why did you go see your X factor?"

"Actually seeing him didn't bother me," I admitted, "I kind of mockingly flirted with him a little. Everything started going south when Jessica left us alone."

"Does she know about your past with Kilgrave?" he asked.

"Yeah," I nodded, "She shares it with me. She's a Kilgrave victim, too."

"Then, why would she have left you alone, knowing how dangerous this man is?"

I looked down at my feet, "Because I asked her to. And when I came out, I let her beat the shit out of him."

"So, what happened after she left you two alone?" Dr. Blake pressed on.

"He said some things to me that really bothered me," I remembered, "I couldn't really tell if he was lying to me or not. I know better. But he told me that he never lied to me and never had a reason to. And that's what bothers me the most. That and a possible betrayal of my trust, but that's here nor there."

"Let's explore that a little more," he insisted, "The betrayal of your trust. What would that be?"

"I think Fury's keeping things from me," I worried, "Kilgrave said that Fury told him he was an asset and that he'd be joining the team. Nick Fury's a smart man. He wouldn't do something so reckless."

"Someone once told him that putting together the Avengers was reckless," Dr. Blake pointed out, "And look how that turned out."

"He's also turned the villain into the hero, too," I sighed out…But then I came to my senses, "No, he didn't. I did! I'm the one that took Loki from villain to…well, chaotic neutral at best, but still! There is no handler at SHIELD like me. And there's no way in hell I'd be handling Kilgrave. It's not going to happen. And if he were to hire another handler, I'm almost positive Kilgrave would end up turning them against us."

"As much as I hate to say this," Dr. Blake put his notes down, "Maybe you're talking to the wrong person about this."

"Do you think I should confront Fury about it?" I wondered, coming down from my adrenaline high.

"At least you'd know," he shrugged, "It's better than worrying about it."

"Maybe I should," I debated.

"Have you been opening up more to people?" Dr. Blake asked.

"I let Loki into my sanctuary the other day," I told, "That was kind of a big step for me."

"And how did that go?"

"We danced…" I blushed.

"And?" 

"It was wonderful," I beamed, remembering our moment in the training room.

"How likely are you to let him back in?"

"Loki can come back anytime," I assured, "Especially if it means that happening again."

"How is your relationship with Loki going?" Dr. Blake picked his notes back up.

"Fine," I said, "We're good. I've thought about starting the wedding planning. It'd make for a nice distraction from the whole Kilgrave thing."

"Sounds like a good idea," he agreed, "I think we're done for the day. Are you coming in next week?"

"Do I need to?" I wondered.

"Entirely up to you," Dr. Blake helped me up, "We've had this talk before."

"If I'm to need you again," I threw my bag over my shoulder, "I'll give you call."

"Always here when you need me."

On that note, I left the good doctor's office and started heading home. That kind of took a lot out of me and all I wanted to do was sleep. But I knew I needed to talk to someone I knew I could trust. Unfortunately, Loki was out of that bubble. I know I can trust Loki with my life, but talking to him about Fury hiring Kilgrave could be disastrous. Loki would end up snapping and going after Fury's throat.

Jessica would half assed understand where I'm coming from, but she was out, too. She'd probably go after Fury as much as what Loki would. Not quite as loose cannon as Loki, but she'd not only kill Fury, but shortly after, she'd kill Kilgrave. We can't do that. I wanted him to be slowly tortured.

I got back to the tower and looked around for anyone who'd listen. Nat and Clint were downstairs working. Steve and Bucky were probably down there, too. In the training room maybe. Bruce had gone on a milk run and Thor went back to Asgard for a little while. That only left one possibility…

I poked my head in Tony's lab and caught him tinkering with one of the Iron Man suits. By the looks of it, he was doing a patch job from the last mission, "Hi, Tony."

"Hey, kid," he put his soldering gun down, "What's up? What brings you to my lab?"

"You think we could talk for a minute?" I asked, "I just came back from the doctor."

"Is it herpes?" Tony cringed, "If it is, you didn't get it from me."

"Not that doctor, you jackass," I rolled my eyes, giggling under my breath, "My head doctor."

"So, what do you need to talk to me for?" he asked, "Did he not do his job?"

"He told me I needed to open up more," I explained, "And right now, I need to open up to you."

"Sure, sweetheart," Tony slid a stool over to me, "What's going on?"

"I went down with Jessica to the detention level this morning," I recalled, sitting down, "And Kilgrave said some things that kind of bothered me."

"Do tell."

"Well," I started, "You're Fury's number one fan, right?"

"I like him about as much as I like a root canal," Tony shrugged.

"Do you have any idea what he plans on doing with Kilgrave?" I kept my fingers crossed and hoped for the best.

"Not a clue," he shook his head, "Sorry. What did he say to you?"

"Promise to keep this between us?"

"Swear on my life."

"Well," I bit my lip, "Kilgrave told me that Fury's hiring a new handler and he's bringing Kilgrave on the team."

"No," Tony put his foot down, "One reformed villain is enough. And I haven't personally met Kilgrave, but he sounds like a real dick."

"Trust me," I grumbled, "He is. I wish I could go up to Fury and ask him about it directly, but I'm terrified to know the answer."

"Listen," Tony wrapped his arms around me, "Don't let Kilgrave get to you. He's trying to fill your head with lies to turn you against us."

"Easier said than done," I let out a heavy sigh.

"You know," Tony thought, "I might have an idea that's crazy enough to work. But you may not like it."

"Oh?"

"Think about it," he elaborated, "Who in this building knows Fury better than anyone else?"

"Hill and Coulson."

"And out of those two, which one do you think knows him the best?"

"Probably Coulson," I assumed, "He's kind of his right hand man."

"And out of all of us, who do you think could get the closest to him?"

My mind went completely blank, "You lost me, Tony."

"You, genius," he cradled his face in his hand, "You. He's not sleeping with anyone else's mom here. Use that to your advantage."

"You think so?" I wondered, "Exploiting his relationship with my mother for information?"

"I'd do it."

"You'd also sell someone for a single corn chip," I chuckled.

"No," Tony scoffed, "I'd sell you for a big chocolate chip cookie."

"Nice, Tony," I said sarcastically, "Good to have you around."

"Seriously, though," he insisted, "Coulson knows just about everything around here. He'd know what Fury's got up his sleeve."

"Do you know where he is?"

"Probably his office."

"Thanks, Tony," I smiled a little, "I really appreciate you letting me vent."

"No problem," he popped me gently in the shoulder, "You take care of us all the time. Might as well return the favor from time to time."

I thought about going to find Coulson, but I didn't have the energy. At this point, I just wanted to go lay in bed, wait for Loki to come home, and call it a night. The vacation exhausted me. This day exhausted me. I missed the days where I could do absolutely nothing and everything would be fine.

Later that night, I had my ass in Loki's stomach and his arms around me. Nothing better than that. I could actually sleep pretty soundly. Between the rhythmic sound of his heartbeat and the comfort of his embrace, life was good. And the world stopped turning for a while.

That is, until a piercing scream broke the still silence in the tower. Not the first time I've heard it. I felt Loki jump beneath me, "What was that?"

"Don't worry about it," I settled him, "Go back to sleep."

"What was it?" Loki stayed persistent.

"The baby's awake," I got out of bed, "Go back to sleep, Loki. I got this."

"Are you sure?" he worried.

"Yes," I assured, "I'm sure I can handle this."

"Alright," Loki remained cautious, "If you need anything…"

"Loki," I stopped him, "I got it. Honestly, baby, you worry too much about me."

"I don't worry enough," he pulled the blanket back over him, "Hurry back."

"I will," I tied my robe and peeked in next door, "Bucky? You ok, honey?"

"Nightmare," Bucky quivered, "Bad one. Really bad…"

"You're ok. None of that was real," I sat at the edge of his bed, my hand on top of his real one, "You need to talk about it?"

"No," he shook his head, "I'd rather not."

"Come here, sweetie," I pulled him against me, "You want me to stay for a while?"

"If you wouldn't mind," Bucky requested, cuddling into my shoulder.

"Alright," I agreed, pulling his hair out of his face, "I'll stay as long as you want me to, ok?"

"Ok…"

"Now," I kissed the top of his head, "Go back to sleep. You need anything to help?"

"I should be alright," Bucky smiled a bit, "I got you, don't I?"

"Always," I held him a little tighter, "Good night, Bucky."

"Good night…"

I cradled the poor, post traumatic angel in my arms while he started to nod off. Oh, Bucky. Poor, sweet Bucky. One day, you'll be alright. One day, we'll be alright. One day, we'll be able to sleep through the night without our abusers coming back in our subconscious. One day, the Winter Soldier and Kilgrave's favorite plaything will be nothing but a distant memory…

 **A/N: I'm going to be completely honest with you. That last part with Bucky having a nightmare? That was mostly me wanting to snuggle the poor baby after the Civil War trailer I watched last night that tore a hole in my heart. I'm terrified to actually watch the movie, in all honesty. Will I? Of course. Because I'm a glutton for fictional characters that cause me severe emotional pain. On that note, I'll see you guys next chapter! xx**


	19. Chapter 19

The cool metal rested on my bare belly where my shirt had come up while I slept. I guess I crashed with Bucky last night. He was still sleeping and he was sleeping hard. Poor little angel. I didn't have the heart to move him, but I had to pee. I took Bucky's arm off my waist as delicately as humanly possible and stole his bathroom for a minute or two.

I had to slip out of Bucky's room in the most covert way I could manage. It's times like these where I'm glad I stuck with the bungees like I did. I could James Bond my ass out of there. With a hint of parkour, if I so choose. No one would be the wiser. I kissed the baby's forehead and snuck out of his room.

"Good morning." Shit, "What were you doing in Bucky's room?"

"Morning, Nat," I joined her at the island, "Bucky was having night terrors again. I took care of him."

"I bet you took care of him," she smirked, "When are you and Loki getting married again?"

"Nothing happened, "I assured, "Bucky wasn't in his right mind. I wouldn't dream of it. Not to mention, I'm kind of engaged. I love Loki. I am loyal to him."

"Just giving you shit, kid," Natasha popped me in the shoulder, "I know better."

"Morning, all," Tony joined us, "What's the kid doing coming out of Optimus Prime's room?"

Damn. The last person in this entire tower I wanted to catch me coming out of Bucky's room. It couldn't have been Steve. I would rather Steve's jealousy any day than Tony's relentless teasing. Fantastic. Just awesome.

"Tony," Natasha scolded, standing up for me, "Play nice. Bucky was having night terrors again. Leave her alone."

"I know," he eased up, "I heard him, too."

"He didn't wake you, did he?" I worried.

"No," Tony brushed me off, "I was tinkering in the lab. Thought I'd make some improvements to the new suit."

"Tony," I broke out the mom voice, "Are you having problems again?"

"No. I'm good."

"He hasn't slept in two days," Natasha chimed in.

"Tony!" I squeaked.

"Natasha!" Tony glared into her where her soul was supposed to be. Popular rumors around the tower were that she sold it for a pack of Bubblicious when she was ten or she sold it for her favorite pair of pistols she kept in her boots.

"What's the matter, Stark?" Natasha jumped onto the counter.

"You got me in trouble with Mom," he pouted.

"I'm not your mom, Tony," I cringed. Wasn't a fan of him calling me his mother, but I didn't have the heart to correct him. And I did have seven other babies to take care of on a semiregular basis.

"What's going on out here?" Loki walked out of our room, fist in his eye, trying to rub out the sleep.

"Since when did you two decide on polygamy?" Tony asked.

"Polygamy?" Loki gave him a look, "What are you talking about?"

"Multiple partners in one relationship," he explained.

"I know what polygamy is," Loki rolled his eyes, "I practically invented it. Pertaining to our situation."

"Your lady friend was getting cuddly with Bucky last night."

"I know," Loki wrapped his arms around my waist, "She was just going her job. I completely understand."

"Now that we have that settled," I gave my fiancé a good morning kiss, "I have to go do the rest of my job. And I have to go bond with my potential future step-dad."

"Taking my advice?" Tony figured.

"Unfortunately."

"What?" Loki wondered, turning his attention to me.

"Don't worry about it," I settled him, "I'll see you later."

I had to get out of there. I trusted Loki with my life, but with him being in Fury's back pocket, I can't be too careful. It wouldn't be the first time he's used Loki against me. And I had to be extremely careful of how I word what I say to Coulson. I can't let him know I'm only talking to him for information on Kilgrave. Where the hell is Coulson? Not in his office. Not in Fury's office. Things were pretty quiet around here. Where the…?

I got it.

I took the elevator down to the garage and sure enough, a pair of feet stuck out from under Lola's back bumper. If he wasn't in the field and he wasn't up Fury's ass, Coulson was under his girl, making sure she was doing ok, finely cleaning her with whoever happened to piss him off this week's toothbrush. I wasn't joking when I said this car was his everything.

"Hey, Coulson," I chimed like nothing was wrong.

"Hey, kiddo," he rolled out from under Lola, "What's up?"

"Nothing much," I shrugged, "What are you up to?"

"She was looking kind of grimy underneath," Coulson got up, spinning the toothbrush between his fingers, "I had nothing better to do."

"Think you and I could talk?" I asked sweetly.

"Sure," Coulson nodded, "Tell you what. Let's go for a drive. No one'll think twice if we're gone for an hour or so."

"Ok," I jumped in Lola's passenger seat. This couldn't be working out any better. We'll be away from Fury and Kilgrave and anyone else who would interrupt us. Besides, something about going out of town onto back roads gave me such a warm, fuzzy feeling. Honestly, it kind of reminded me of my dad. I understand why Mom had such an attraction for Coulson.

"So, what's eating you?" Coulson asked, "Everything alright?"

"I went to the doctor yesterday," I began, "And he got me thinking a lot about you and my mom."

"Look," he stopped me, "I love your mom. I really do. If we were going to do something silly like get married, I'd make sure to ask you first. I kind of screwed up when I didn't talk to you about it when I started giving her updates about you. She's just worried about you. She doesn't want you getting hurt."

"Thanks, Coulson," I smiled a bit, "I already consider you family."

"Really…?"

"Yeah," I confirmed, "Think about it. You've been like a dad to me since I started here. You showed me everything I know. Of course I'd consider you family."

"Wow…" If I didn't know any better, I'd think I saw a tear roll out of Phil Coulson's eye right then and there, "I'm flattered, kid. Considering I'd have big shoes to fill."

"You and my dad were cut from the same cloth," I told, "That's for sure."

"He was a good man," Coulson agreed, "For his tenacious, stubborn, occasional pain in the ass daughter to say something like that to me is a great honor."

"Thanks, Coulson," I chuckled, "I'm not a pain in the ass."

"You have your moments."

"Something else was kind of bothering me, too," I segued, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Shoot."

Here goes nothing, "Have we hired on anyone new recently?"

"A handler," he thought it over, "But that's it. Why do you ask?"

My stomach dropped and I was going to be sick. I couldn't throw up in Lola. She didn't deserve that. That'd be like peeing on the Pope's shoes. Kilgrave was right. And he was being honest with me. And that terrified the hell out of me.

"Just curious," I brushed it off like it was nothing, "Wondering if I had anyone new to take care of. Taking care of the Avengers is rough enough."

"That's why we got another handler," he clarified, "To help take some of your workload off."

"Any idea on who they'll be handling?" As if I didn't already know.

"They'll just be on the back burner for now," Coulson said, "In case we need them."

Of course. In case we need them. You know…For Kilgrave. For the son of a bitch that has single handedly torn my brain to shreds. For the dick we have down in holding that we have to keep under sedation or he could kill us all. Yeah. That seems like a good idea. What could possibly go wrong? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, NICK FURY?

I wish we would've just given Kilgrave to Jessica, so she would've killed him quickly. Or slowly. And painfully. And gave me a comfortable seat to watch from. But now, Kilgrave was going to join the damn Avengers? No. I don't think so.

I know it worked when we brought in Loki, but he also had me. I'm the one that made him better. I sensed the good in him. I knew that Loki was just misunderstood. Kilgrave is not, nor will he ever be, anything like Loki.

 **A/N: So, that happened. Kilgrave? Joining the Avengers? It could happen…Now, the reviews are being finicky (surprise, surprise), so if you're going to say nice things, the inbox is just over there…You know where it is. See you next chapter! xx**


	20. Chapter 20

Dare I do it? I'll need to confront Fury about it eventually before it's too late. There is no way we can let Kilgrave join the team. I refuse to let him walk around a borderline free man. That could not and will not happen. It just can't…

And overthinking about it isn't going to help matters. Fortunately for me, I had a wonderful fiancé that can tell when something's up with me. Sometimes that's a benefit, sometimes it's a detriment, but in this case? It's a welcomed friend. When I came back from my mini road trip with Coulson, I didn't have a choice in the matter. I had St. Thomas flashbacks as soon as I walked in my bedroom.

Roses on the bed. A pretty dress. And a note from the sweetest demigod in the history of mankind.

 _You work yourself too hard._

 _Come play with me._

 _I'll be waiting in the garage._

 _All my love,_

 _Loki._

I swear to God…He really needs to stop watching chick flicks with Steve when I'm not home. Don't get me wrong. In his own special way, Loki manages to make it sweet and adorable. But for a girl that doesn't really do chick flicks, it's almost a little cringe worthy. I'll take the romantic gesture, though. I got dressed and ready in near record time, got the chorus of the wolf whistles of approval, and headed downstairs.

"About time," Loki teased, "You took too long."

"I had just gotten in," I shoved him, stealing a quick kiss from him, "Cut me some slack."

"Just this once, though," he got in the driver's side of Tony's Lamborghini, "I wouldn't want it going to your head."

I loved this man…

Loki took me uptown, far enough away from the tower to completely distract me from everything and anything my little head wanted to stir up. However, as we distanced ourselves from the tower, he felt me distancing myself from him. I could spit from my side of the table to his, but we never felt so far apart.

"If I didn't know any better," Loki broke the uncomfortable silence, "I'd think you were ignoring me."

"No," I promised, "Not ignoring you. I swear."

"You've had more conversation with the waiter than you have with me," he chuckled, "A lot on your mind?"

"Yeah," I nodded, playing with his fingers, "That drive with Coulson kind of knocked some things loose."

"Are you alright?" Loki worried.

"Eventually."

"You know," Loki said, "You and I haven't seen much of each other since you've gone back to work."

"I've been busy."

"Please," Loki took my hands, "Talk to me, darling. You've been telling me that you and I will talk later, but you end up either busy or sleeping. That's why I took you out of the tower tonight. No distractions. No interruptions. No wires. Now, tell me what's bothering you…"

"Can I ask you a question?" I asked, "And you answer it honestly? Regardless of what you've been told?"

"Always."

Here goes nothing, "Do you know about Fury's plans for Kilgrave?"

"Did he get in your head again?" Loki immediately jumped on the defensive.

"Just answer me," I begged, a bit of a snarl in my voice.

"No," Loki sighed out, "I don't. Fury figures that knowing about Kilgrave is a need to know basis thing. Now, you answer me. Did Kilgrave get in your head again?"

"He did at first," I admitted, "But I did some digging and some fact checking. And some of what Kilgrave told me was true."

"How far up did you go?" Loki wondered, "How deep did you dig?"

"Pretty deep," I went on, "Why else would I have gone out on the back roads with Coulson today? Father-daughter bonding time? No. I love Coulson, but I don't think we could ever really have that kind of a bond. The fact that I was using him to get information is kind of proof of that. I mean, he's Fury's right hand man. He had to know something."

"Listen to me, my love," his voice shook, "I know it's hard for you to see this right now, but this is exactly what Kilgrave wants. He wants to turn you, the best SHIELD has to offer aside from the Avengers, against the rest of us. I want you to make me a promise. Right here. Right now."

"What is it?"

"Don't let him win," Loki demanded, "Do not let Kilgrave win. You are stronger than you know, darling. Kilgrave is just a hiccup. You just need some water and time and he'll go away."

If Fury's brought Kilgrave on, he's already won.

Loki and I got home that night and I couldn't sleep to save my life. A part of me kind of wanted to go crawl in with Bucky, but I knew better. I didn't want a repeat of the last time I came out of his bedroom. I couldn't handle dealing with Tony again. Just what I wanted. Rumors circulating around the tower that Loki and I aren't doing good. That's something that needs to get down to Kilgrave…

The next morning, despite my serious need for a cocktail of coffee and cocaine with a hint of meth, I left for Dr. Blake's office. Dr. Donald Blake. Psychiatrist to the Avengers, but he can't tell anyone about it…Hold on…Wow…I've never felt so stupid. Now, I know why Dr. Donald Blake sounds so familiar. He's not the psychiatrist to the Avengers…

"Hello, my dear," he welcomed me into his office, "Is everything alright? You seem distressed."

"I figured something out today," I sat on his couch, "I know why I can open up to you as well as what I do."

"Oh?" the "doctor" sat with me, "And why is that?"

A little smile stretched across my face, "You can drop the act, Loki. I know it's you."

"Loki?" he gave me a look, "What do you mean? You think I'm your fiancé?"

"I don't think so," I assured, "I know so. I've finally seen through your magic, baby. Only took me this long, but I've finally seen through it."

"Really," Dr. Blake's façade broke, "So, what gave me away?"

"The name," I told, "I knew it sounded familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. When I knew I was going to come back here this morning, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Dr. Donald Blake isn't the psychiatrist to the Avengers. He _is_ an Avenger. It's the same name your brother uses when he has to mingle amongst the Midgardians."

"You wouldn't have been able to really open up to anyone else," Loki cradled me in his arms, "That's why you have me."

"Who else knew you were my doctor?"

"Just Fury," he explained, "He told me he had the most special of special ops to give me that would've hit the closest to home. And that's when I stopped being Loki for an hour or so whenever you called and started being your doctor."

"You know," I rested my head on his shoulder, "I should be pissed off beyond belief at you."

"But…?"

"Thank you, Loki," I kissed his cheek, "Thank you for being there."

"Always, darling."

"Now, for the real question," I wiggled out of his embrace, "How much of my sessions with the good doctor have you told the boss?"

"Enough to keep him content," Loki pulled me back to him, "Not too much."

"Will you tell him about what I said about Kilgrave?"

"Why would I?" he wondered, "What did he say to you?"

"You have to promise me you won't blow up about it," I demanded.

"I swear."

"Alright," I sighed out, "Kilgrave told me that Fury hired on a new handler while we were gone. Coulson confirmed it."

"What would we need a new handler for?"

"According to Coulson," I went on, "they're just on the backburner in case we need one. Kilgrave told me a different tale."

"Oh?" Loki held me tighter.

"Kilgrave said that the new handler was for him," I growled, "And he was joining the team because Fury saw him as too valuable of an asset to kill him."

"No," he snapped, "There's no way. Director Fury wouldn't be so stupid. After what he's done to you? And with his power? Who's to say he won't corrupt either his handler or another SHIELD agent? That's not going to happen."

"He said Fury did it while we were gone, so I wouldn't get in the way," my voice broke.

"Think of it this way," Loki put it into perspective, "You know Kilgrave would want to get you all riled up, right?"

"Right."

"If he was to get handler," he continued, "Why would he still be in max holding?"

Loki had a point, but still. It wasn't enough for me to get some sleep, "I still want to get an answer out of Fury. Just to make sure."

"Would you like me to come with you?" Loki offered, "I think I want to hear it for myself."

"If you don't mind."

"Come on," Loki pulled me up to my feet, "We need to go see Director Fury."

"Now?" I got really nervous.

"Can you think of a better time?"

 **A/N: Hi, guys! Now we know why Dr. Donald Blake sounded so darn familiar…And next week, we'll be confronting Fury about what's going on with the lunatic downstairs. But first, how about we address some guest comments from last update? To HeavyAway, if you're still reading this, first of all, thank you. You're awesome. I'm glad you like what I do. The OC's amazing because YOU are the OC and you are just a wonderful human being. And I'd update this more than once a week if I didn't have four other stories I update in a week. I also need a little bit of downtime, too. I'm only one person that writes all of these.**

 **I'll admit that this one almost didn't get an update this week. Between the site being mood swingy and my general exhaustion, I was just going to say screw it and not update. But! I persevered! Good for me. And I'll see you next chapter! xx**


	21. Chapter 21

The entire walk back to the tower was dead silent. As much as it could be for Manhattan. Loki had a hold of my hand to control my shaking. The very thought of what I was about to do made me queasy. I could feel my heart about to burst through my chest. And things only got worse as the two of us got into the elevator.

The elevator ride felt like an eternity. I didn't want to do this. I really didn't. I know I needed to, but that doesn't mean I can't dig my heels in a little bit about it. The thought of Fury going behind my back like that. No. Kilgrave was wrong. Fury wasn't hiring him on. Kilgrave would be shot up with a lethal dose of whatever they're giving him. They'd turn his lights out. We all go home knowing this was just a big misunderstanding and it'll be something to laugh about at the Christmas party.

But what Coulson said about hiring on a new handler. And Kilgrave's genuine excitement. He only gets that giddy over something that he knows is going to royally shit on someone's day. That someone would happen to be me. What better revenge than being practically attached to my hip? I know Coulson said it was only a back burner type thing, but something about it still didn't sit right with me. No. I had to keep my head. It was the only thing I had left. And I barely had that.

I'm just overthinking, right? That's what the doctor would say. Then again, that doctor was just Loki, but he still knew what he was doing. Never expected Loki to be the best shrink I've ever had. The one person in the whole damn tower that I knew would be there for me, no matter the circumstances. I'd always have a demigod in my back pocket.

But what Kilgrave said still bugged me. Because it was so true. I knew Fury pretty well. I've been here long enough to know how that man's brain works. It's not like him to throw away a valuable asset so easily. Especially when it comes to the superhuman kind. Unfortunately, Kilgrave has that whole mind control and manipulation thing going for him. I don't see Fury throwing that away.

He also considers me one of the best SHIELD agents he's ever had. Fury wouldn't want to lose me either. I might have been a glorified babysitter, but coming between a super soldier and an engineering genius on a regular basis is grueling. Getting an extremely post traumatic, post brainwashed, former US military turned HYDRA captive to differentiate between James Barnes and the Winter Soldier is sleep depriving. Keeping someone who's been heavily exposed to an ASTRONOMICAL amount of gamma radiation as calm as humanly possible was extremely taxing (and being one of the few people that can get the other guy to settle down wasn't any easier). I don't see anyone else doing any of that quite like I do.

Kilgrave's dangerous. There's no doubt that Fury would give him the same probation he gave Loki. That meant him moving into the tower. We couldn't have that. I'd move out. There would be no way in hell I'd be able to stay at the tower with that asshole a few rooms down from me. Not to mention it'd be a hazard for him, too. Who's going to stop me from smothering him in his sleep? I'm pretty sure I'd have the entire team backing me up. If Fury's serious about bringing Kilgrave onto the team, I wouldn't be able to continue my duties of a SHIELD agent anymore. We'll call it an occupational hazard.

Then, there's the problem of a handler for him! How would Kilgrave's handler manage him? Especially in a field op! It's not like they'd be able to control him once he has control of them. Would they be carrying a tranquilizer gun with them? A taser? And to tranquilize him in public would be too obvious. What if he were to turn it around on them?

The amount of narcotics we're giving him now are enough to bring down a grizzly bear. Giving that to a normal person would kill them. Then, not only would we have an agent casualty, but we'd also have Kilgrave loose on the streets of New York and we'd be back to square one. And I'll be DAMNED if I were to be the one to go back and get him again. No. No, no, no. No. No. Not happening. I've made a bit of progress since I've been home. I don't want to start backsliding now.

He can't…He just can't…

"Are you alright, darling?" Loki worried, putting an arm around me, "You seem tense."

"I'll be fine," I quivered, "Just a little nervous."

"A little?" Loki brought me down to the floor, knowing I was a little more than just nervous. I had a feeling that I could easily see a piece of Double Bubble I swallowed in sixth grade all over this elevator, "Are you sure about that?"

"No," I buried my face in his shoulder, "I just have so much misgivings about this. I really hope this was all just Kilgrave trying to get under my skin and none of it holds any truth."

"Do you have a contingency if it does?" he wondered.

"I'm giving Fury an ultimatum," I put it bluntly, "Simple as that. Kilgrave leaves or I do. And if Kilgrave leaves, he leaves in a body bag. And he stays dead. No bringing him back and keeping him somewhere else. I don't want that son of a bitch to continue breathing. I've done all I can to keep myself from sneaking down to max in the middle of the night and slitting his throat, making sure he's awake, so I can watch the life drain from his beady little eyes."

"That's my girl," Loki pulled me back up to my feet and against his chest, "Whatever happens, remember that I'm right behind you. I'm not going anywhere." 

"Thanks, baby," I gave him a soft, sweet kiss, "I love you."

"I love you, too," he gave me a little nudge toward Fury's office door, "Go on, darling. Ease your mind."

I had to shake off any ounce of fear I had from this point on. I could do this. I could do this. I could do this. I knocked on Fury's door, "Director?"

"Agent. Loki," Fury allowed us in.

"Do you have a minute?" I asked, feeling the adrenaline rush in my blood.

"Sure, kid," Fury sat on his desk, "What's up?"

Here we go…

"I need you to clarify a rumor for me, sir."

 **A/N: Honestly, that ending sentence kind of gave me chills. I'm sorry this chapter was so short. This story has been kind of an uphill struggle to write recently. Like…for the past month. I don't know why, but it's just got me stumped. I know what's going to happen. I know Fury's plans for Kilgrave. I know what's going on. It's just a matter of getting it on paper. Maybe this will help. If I were to do an entire week of updates for one story, would you guys be ok with that? Kilgrave's Good Little Girl week would be from June 27 to July 1. But that also means hiatus until then. Give me some thoughts and I'll see you next chapter. xx**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Hi, guys! That's right! If you're just now tuning in to the program here, this is AVENGERS BOMB WEEK! Yaaayyy! It's been quite some time since we last saw each other. I'm excited to see you all again. Recap? Yeah? Sounds like a good idea. Considering I left you guys on quite the cliffhanger. Sorry. I'm a jerk. If you're just getting here, you'll learn that. If you've been here a while, you know. You know I'm a jerk. That's not true. I'm actually quite the sweetheart, but I'm starting to ramble. How about that recap?**

 **When we last left off, Kilgrave had gotten into the head of the reader (that's you!) and said he was joining the team. Yay! No! Not yay! We also had Coulson confirm the recent addition to the team in the form of a handler. Now, the reader (still you) is currently in Fury's office, asking about a rumor. All caught up? Relatively? You good? Alright! Let's get on with it then, shall we?**

"A rumor?" Fury made me nervous, "What kind of rumor?"

"Well," I wrung my hands anxiously, "I heard we were getting a new handler."

"Yeah," Fury sat at his desk, "What about it?"

"You don't hire reserves," I cut to the chase, "Who's getting the handler?"

The director let out a heavy sigh that sent my stomach into an instant knot, "You know who it's for."

"No, I don't," I growled, "Who is it, Director?"

Fury held his face in his hand, "We're keeping him."

"What?!" my heart stopped.

"I'd be stupid to get rid of him," he pointed out, "He's a valuable asset."

"He's a sociopath!" I screeched, "Nick, you have to see through him!"

"I have seen through him," Fury stood his ground, "And I see an asset."

"You got half of that right," I grumbled, "No. Kilgrave's an all-around asshole! He needs to be stopped, not encouraged!"

"You see it, too," he went on, "Imagine what someone like Kilgrave could do if his power was pushed in the right direction."

"I see more than you do!" I fought, "I spent an entire month with that dick! I know what he's like and no amount of reinforcement is going to change that. He's a prick to his very core! There's no changing him. There's no fixing him. You can't do this!"

"Actually, I can," Fury got up, glaring a hole through me, "That's why I'm the Director."

"Please…" my voice broke, "Don't do this, Nick…"

"I've already made my decision."

"I'm sure you're right," I scoffed, my tears turning into anger, "He's only psychologically scarred one of your best agents, but by all means! Bring him on! Let's keep him like a stray puppy! I've always wanted one that could kill me without even touching me! Or better yet, have one of my dear friends that I know and love kill me!"

"Look," Fury sat next to me, "I know it's hard for you to understand. Just think of the positives."

"What positives?" I snapped, "Come on, Fury. You're smarter than this."

"You act like we haven't thought this over," he rolled his eye, "We have a contingency plan for him. If he even steps a single toe out of line and does something we don't want him to, Kilgrave's handler will be equipped with a lethal injection of the sedatives we've been giving him and he's gone."

"There is no amount that would be enough," I promised, "Ever noticed he bounces back rather quickly from the beatings Jessica gives him?"

"I'm sure we can find something to kill his healing factor, too," Fury assured, "That's why we have some of the greatest minds in the world in our labs."

"I don't want to do this, Nick," I sighed, "But you leave me no other choice. Either Kilgrave goes or I do."

"You don't have the authority to call shots like that, Agent," Fury glared at me.

"That's my ultimatum," I stood my ground. There would be no way in hell I was going to work with Kilgrave. That's just not going to happen. I haven't had a flashback in ages. I wanted to keep it that way.

"You'll learn to live with him," he brushed me off, "This is just the PTSD talking. Go come down from this and we'll talk later."

"But-"

"That's an order, Agent," Fury demanded, "Go."

I couldn't believe him. I really couldn't. I had never been so irate in my life. I knew Fury couldn't waste an asset, but I thought he would've taken Kilgrave out just this once for me. I thought we were closer than that. Between him and Coulson, Fury's taken care of me since I got here. Practically held my hand during my first steps in the field. The fact that he's choosing Kilgrave over me makes me physically nauseous.

"Are you alright?" Loki held me in the elevator.

"Thanks a lot, Loki," I shook him off, "You were awfully supportive. I appreciate it."

"If I were to say anything to Fury," he put it into perspective, "I get put in a cell and I die. I don't know about you, but I'd rather avoid my death at all costs."

"I still can't believe he's taking on Kilgrave," I sighed out, stepping out of our elevator and into our room.

"Look," Loki crawled next to me in bed, wrapping his arms around me, "I'll talk to Fury in the morning. We'll see what we can do about this whole Kilgrave situation. Maybe he'll listen to a former villain."

"Loki," I cuddled into him, "You weren't the villain. You were a victim. Kilgrave's just seriously screwed up in the head. I don't want him here. He's not a part of the team. He'll never be a part of the team."

"Don't worry," Loki kissed my forehead, "It'll be alright. I'll try to fix this to the best of my ability."

"Thank you…"

"Good night, darling," he held me closer, "I love you…"

"I love you, too," I loved how all it took were those three little words from him to bring me down just a little bit.

But this whole Kilgrave thing still has me pissed off beyond all belief. I had to go clear my head. And I couldn't do that here. Not when everything reminded me of why I was pissed in the first place. Liquor wasn't going to do the job this time. I wish a good shot of whiskey could help, but nineteenth century absinthe wouldn't even do the trick.

I threw my overnight bag over my shoulder and gently gave Loki a kiss. Not enough to wake him up. He'd try too hard to stop me. And I wouldn't be able to say good bye to him. It'd be too painful. I slipped out the front door without a trace and took off for the airport. I couldn't go home. I didn't want to drag Mom into this and it'd be the first place they'd look for me. I knew exactly where I could go.

"Hi!" the lady behind the counter chimed, "How can I help you?"

"I need a ticket to Los Angeles, please," I requested.

"Sure," she looked through her computer, "Any time in particular?"

"The next flight out."

"Let's see…" she scrolled, "I have one going out at eleven o'clock."

"Good enough," I said, "I'll take it."

"Can I get a name please?"

I thumbed through my wallet of my different aliases and pulled out a credit card, "Doris Clemens."

"Enjoy your flight, Ms. Clemens," she smiled and gave me my ticket. Good bye, New York. I don't know when I'll see you again, but for now, California awaits…

 **A/N: So…They're keeping Kilgrave. And we've also gone a little AWOL…She did tell Fury that either Kilgrave goes or she does. And she did. Don't ask where Doris Clemens came from. Just one of those weird names that I rattled off the top of my head. It's not really going to mean much. Except for in the next chapter when…Well…You'll see. Tomorrow. See you next chapter, guys! xx**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Welcome to day two, kids. We deserve a nice location, don't we?**

It's been a solid week since I've been in Malibu at Tony's place. Not bad. No one's here. Tony's in New York. Pepper's in DC. I had the whole place to myself, with the exception of JARVIS keeping me company. The views were impeccable. The booze was plentiful. I couldn't have picked a better place to lay low.

But I missed Loki…And Thor. And Tony. And Steve. And Bruce. And Bucky. And Clint. And Nat. And Jessica. I missed home. I didn't know how long I was going to hid in Malibu. My phone had been ringing off the hook since I got here. And I let it ring.

I had one that made my stomach turn. My mother. I knew she was worried and I felt like shit for keeping her in the dark like this. I'm sure that Coulson told her I left without a trace. He probably called her first. And he was probably using her phone thinking he'd have a better shot at getting a hold of me. Still. I shouldn't make her worry so much. I couldn't risk giving away my location, though. SHIELD would be so far up my ass that if I opened my mouth, Fury would be sticking out of my throat. I wished there was a way to let her know I was safe.

"A little casual B and E, huh, Doris?" a familiar voice echoed through the halls.

"Like you'd care." Shit. I've been found.

"Not at all," Tony sat with me on the couch, taking his helmet off, "Mi casa es su casa, chica."

"What are you doing here, Tony?" I sighed out.

"Beside the fact that it's my house?"

"I know," I groaned, "Stupid question."

"Better one," Tony asked, "What are _you_ doing here…? You got some explaining to do."

"You know," I brushed him off, "My friends call me Dottie."

"Well then, Dottie," he teased, "What brings you to my cozy home in Malibu?"

"I needed to lay low," I rested my head on Tony's shoulder, "I couldn't stay there, Tony. I just…I couldn't."

"I know, kid," Tony wrapped his cool, metal arms around me. For a brief moment, it made me think of all those nights I spent with Bucky, getting him to sleep, bringing him down from night terrors. I hated that I was found, but of all people to find me, I couldn't have asked for anyone better, "I met that Kilgrave fellow you went on and on about in your last report."

"Sweetheart, isn't he?"

"And I thought I was a prick," he chuckled to himself, "I understand why you hate him so much."

"No," I corrected, "I hate him because he violated me nightly and ruined kink for me. You didn't have to have sex with him."

"That bad?"

"Forced, Tony. Forced."

"True," he nodded, "Can I ask you something?"

"Go for it."

"Is he why you left?" Tony wondered, "Kilgrave?"

"Yeah," I looked away from him, "I really don't feel like talking about it, Tony. I'm not in the mood."

"Good," he chirped, "Then, shut up and listen."

"I'm listening," I curled into his side.

"We all want you back," he began, "Hell, we need you back. Things haven't exactly been easy on the homefront since you left. Clint and Natasha split your duties and it's been chaos. Jessica got called on assignment to find other superhumans. Loki's been a borderline comatose wreck…Look, I'm the only one that knows you're here."

"How did you know I was here?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"A little AI told me," he smiled at me, "JARVIS let me know as soon as you broke in here. That takes some serious hacking skills."

"Thank you," I bowed, "Are you going to tell Fury?"

"No," he shook his head, "You're here for your own reasons. But if you love your alien boyfriend, I suggest you come home."

"I do love Loki," I defended, "But I can't come back."

"I didn't want to have to tell you this…" Tony held me closer, "Fury's threatening Loki's exile."

"What…?" my eyes started turning red, "What do you mean, he's threatening Loki's exile?"

"Just that," he went on, "Loki doesn't have a handler. His usual one left without thinking it through. Loki's been deemed a threat to the human race and should not be left on Earth. So, Fury's going to have Thor take him back to Asgard."

Then, it all hit me at once. I didn't realize the kind of ripple effect my leaving would have. I definitely didn't want Thor to take Loki back to Asgard. I'd never see him again. Fury was using my Loki as bait and that was bullshit. That was low, even for him, "Where is Loki now?"

"He's in a holding cell," Tony knew I was hurting. And I was. The thought of my poor little angel in a holding cell, probably thinking I abandoned him, broke my heart, "The choice is yours, kid. You could stay in Malibu enjoying the solitude of my house or you can come home and save all of us. I nearly punched Steve yesterday. We need you back. I know you'll make the right decision."

Tony had a point. If I were to go home, I could take care of everyone again like it was the good old days. But I'd still have to deal with Kilgrave. Worse, I'd have to deal with the proverbial spanking from Fury. Joy. There was something I was looking forward to. Hold on…I knew Tony could be a sweetheart from time to time, but he was making me borderline diabetic.

"Tony…?" I looked up at him.

"Yeah, sweetheart?"

I grabbed the lamp off the table and knocked him out. I had a perfectly logical reason for doing what I did. That wasn't the Tony Stark I knew and loved. He was being controlled. I knew this would happen. I just knew it. But no. I was the one in the wrong. A part of me wanted to rub this in Fury's face, but bigger fish.

"Would you like me to call an ambulance, Miss?" JARVIS offered, "It appears Mr. Stark is unconscious."

"That was the idea, JARVIS," I promised, grabbing Tony's legs and dragging him down to the basement.

 **A/N: I thought another cliffhanger would be a fun thing to do. And no, it's not a sex torture dungeon in Tony's basement…Not all of it. Wink. No. I'm just being silly. Forgive me. So, we have further proof that Nick Fury is a dick, but it's about to get a whole lot worse. There is a much bigger shit storm afoot. This is just the light sprinkling. See you next chapter! xx**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Day three. Let's see what day three has for us. The exciting conclusion of the cliffhanger I gave you guys yesterday! Yay! Plus something absolutely precious, if you ask me. Enjoy!**

"Ouch," Tony started to come back, "What the hell happened? What are we doing in my basement?"

"Sorry, Tony," I apologized, "It had to be done."

"Why do I have such a bitch of a headache?" he asked, jostling around in the chair, "And why am I tied down? Aren't you and Loki engaged?"

"I kind of knocked you upside the head with a lamp," I admitted. There he was. That was the Tony Stark I knew and loved, "I'm sorry, but you had Kilgrave in your head, didn't you?"

"Yes," Tony nodded, "Seriously, kid. Like, some aspirin or something?"

"Sure," I had acquainted myself with every piece of equipment in Tony's lab since I got here. Mostly so I didn't accidentally set it off, but I found tinkering to be oddly therapeutic. And I had made a friend, "Dum-E, can you come here for a minute please?"

"Dum-E?" Tony gave me a look, "Really? You're using Dum-E?"

"Be nice, Tony," I scolded, as the robotic assistant buzzed over to me, "Dum-E…Where's Sis-E?"

Dum-E lowered his upper extremity, making me nervous. Sis-E was still pretty fragile yet. Tony peeked around, "Sis-E? I don't remember making another robot."

"Sis-E!" I called out, "Where are you, sweetheart?"

"Who's Sis-E?" Tony wondered.

"I got bored," I shrugged, a little pink robot rolled around the corner, "There she is. Hi, sweetie."

"I play a joke, Mama!" she chimed, "I get to help?"

"You sure do," I beamed, "First, I want you to meet Mr. Stark, ok? He's your brother's creator."

"Brother?" I had Tony so confused and disoriented, "All I wanted was some damn aspirin."

"Papa!" Sis-E rolled into Tony's shins repeatedly.

"Whoa there, little one," he jumped a little, "You made Dum-E a sister?"

"Yeah," I brushed him off, "Sis-E, I have a job for you. You, too, Dum-E."

Dum-E perked up a little more and Sis-E rolled to my feet, "Yes, Mama? What do we do?"

"I need you both to find Mr. Stark some aspirin, ok?" I instructed, "It's in a red and white bottle. Keep an eye on each other, got it?"

Dum-E nodded and Sis-E beeped at me in sheer excitement, "Wee! We get to do something for Mama and Papa, big brother! Yay!"

"Go on," I nudged them along and the two of them went off on their grand quest.

"You made her?" Tony gasped, "The little pink R2-D2 is yours?"

"Like I said," I reiterated, "I got bored. I tinkered."

"Didn't know you knew anything about advanced robotics," he admitted.

"I lived with Iron Man for five years," I reminded, "You don't think I picked up a few things?"

"I think I love you."

"Focus, Tony," I rolled my eyes, "Did you have Kilgrave in your head?"

"Yes, I did," he nodded, "He told me to find you and convince you to come back home."

"What does he want?" I asked.

"You. He said you got him. And he misses you." All of a sudden, Tony turned really paranoid, "Is he still in my head? Is this still me?"

"Relax, Tony," I settled him, taking his hand before he could throw himself into an existential panic attack, "It's been twenty-four hours. You're ok. He's out of your head. You're going to be alright. You're you again. The thoughts you're having right now are your own independent thoughts. Tell me. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be?"

"I don't know," he shook, "Maui, maybe?"

"Tell me about it," I insisted, "Are you there by yourself?"

"No," Tony went on, "Pepper's there, too. She deserves this more than anyone."

"Close your eyes and describe it for me."

"I can feel it," a little smile graced his face, "The warmth of the sand. The sun shining. The smell of the ocean. The taste of the piña colada on Pepper's lips. The sound of the waves crashing on the beach. It's beautiful. And quiet. Just the two of us."

"There you go." Like riding a bike.

"Mama!" Sis-E and Dum-E came back, "I got Papa's aspirin!"

"That's my girl," I praised, taking the bottle from her, "Here, Tony."

"Bless you," he popped a couple of white tablets in his mouth, "Thank you, Sis-E."

"You're welcome, Papa!" she squeaked.

"I'm not your Papa," he assured, "I'm Dum-E's Papa. You have your Mama."

"I…" Sis-E was at a loss, "I don't understand…"

"I didn't make you," Tony explained, "Therefore, I'm not your Papa."

"Waaahhhhhh!" Sis-E ran off, leaving a trail of oil behind her.

"You had to give her a speech function and emotions, didn't you?" he shot a glare toward me.

"You hurt her feelings," I reprimanded, "Sis-E, come back here."

"No!" she whined, "I don't want to!"

"Sis-E…" I pulled out the mom voice, "Come here. He didn't mean it."

"Does…" Sis-E came sniveling back, "Does that mean he is my Papa? And we're all a happy family?"

"Yes," I wiped the oil off her interface screen, choking up a bit myself, "We're all a happy family. You have me and Papa and Dum-E. Now, go play with your brother, ok? Papa and I need to talk."

"Ok, Mama," Sis-E followed her brother out.

"Dum-E," I stopped him. He looked over at me, "Take care of her. She's the only little sister you got."

Dum-E nodded and ran after Sis-E. Tony and I had to have some words. But first, I had to untie him, "About time. I've only been like this since I got here."

"Don't be such a drama queen," I teased, "Now, I know this is going to suck and it's the last thing you'll want to talk about for a while, but we need to talk about the asshole elephant in the room."

"Me?"

"No, Tony," I giggled a little bit, "Kilgrave. You're a peach compared to that dick. Remember? We had this conversation."

"We did?" he wondered, "I don't remember us talking about Kilgrave."

"I did pop you pretty hard," I bit my bottom lip, "And I owe you a new lamp."

"Tell me it wasn't the Tiffany lamp," Tony cringed, "Blue glass shade? Black frame?"

"No," I promised, "It wasn't the Tiffany lamp."

"Good," he let out a heavy sigh of relief, "Those things are expensive as hell and Pepper would've killed me."

"No, she wouldn't," I got us back on track, "Anyway. Kilgrave. Who else does he have?"

"He's got Fury," Tony told, "I don't know how long he's had him, but he's got him."

"I could probably fathom a guess," I grumbled, "I knew keeping him was playing with fire. And here we are, getting burned. Who else?"

"Kilgrave's done his research," he continued, "He knows he can't control Thor or Loki. He tried."

"I saw him try and control Loki once," I reminisced, "Good times."

"But," Tony took my hand, "He's got Bucky."

"Kilgrave did do his research," my stomach dropped, "My Bucky? He's got my Bucky?"

"He's got Natasha, too," he sighed, "We're royally boned here."

The worst possible scenario popped into my head, "What about Bruce?"

"Kilgrave doesn't see Bruce as useful. He didn't get that far in his research."

"If Kilgrave were to have unleashed the Hulk," I quivered, "We would've been more royally boned. I'm guessing he didn't think he needed to go any further once he saw former KGB raised to be a killer and former HYDRA assassin on super soldier steroids. Where is Bruce now?"

"China," Tony said, "Once you left, I had a feeling that shit was about to go down, so I told him to get out of dodge."

"Always the boy scout, Tony Stark," I praised.

"So?" he asked, "Are you coming back?"

"It's what Kilgrave wants, isn't it?" I got really pissed and really protective at the drop of a hat, "Kilgrave hurt my babies. It's time that Mommy comes home…"

"You want a suit?" he offered.

"I don't need a suit," I growled, "I just need everyone out of the way while I go for Kilgrave's throat. Can you do that for me?"

"Sure," Tony agreed, knowing better than to screw with me when I'm pissed, "I'll fly back right now."

"Hey, Tony," I grabbed his arm before he put his helmet back on, "Could you do me a huge solid?"

"Of course, kid. What do you need?"

"When you get back to the tower," my voice broke, "Go see Loki. Tell him I love him…And I'm sorry."

"Yeah," he wrapped his arms around me, "I can do that."

"I'll fly home in the morning," I promised, "JARVIS?"

"Yes, Miss?" JARVIS chimed in.

"The first flight leaving for JFK tomorrow," I demanded, "Put me on it."

"Yes, Miss," he confirmed, "Your flight leaves at six o'clock, local time."

"Thank you," I growled, "See you on the other side."

"You can count on it," I watched as Tony took off at supersonic speeds back to New York.

"Mama…" Sis-E rolled to my feet, "Where's Papa going?"

"Back to New York," I broke the news, "And I'll be going back in the morning. Are you going to be ok here without me?"

"You're leaving?" she started leaking oil again.

"Don't worry, sweetheart," I wiped her screen, "You'll have Dum-E here and JARVIS, too."

"But I won't have you…"

"I'll be back," I swore, "Hopefully, when I come back, I'll have your real Papa with me."

Sis-E laid her top half on my leg, "I love you, Mama."

"I love you, too, baby," I smiled a little, "Now, I need to get some sleep. I have an early flight in the morning. You should probably charge up, too. JARVIS?"

"Yes, Miss?"

"Will you put the children to bed for me?" I asked.

"Of course," he obliged, "Come along, Sis-E. I will talk you through your charging process."

"Thank you, JARVIS," I started heading upstairs to the bedroom. Tony's bed wasn't much different from mine at the tower. Definitely made it easier to sleep. But the body pillow wasn't the same. It got too warm too quickly. I missed my little ice cube and I wanted to go home.

 **A/N: Ah, nothing quite like a little cognitive recalibration to get Tony back to being himself. Even though that poor little angel had to go through a little bit of a minor panic attack. And that whole trip to Maui sounds like a good idea, no? Never been to Hawaii, but I wouldn't mind it. Now, can we talk about Sis-E…? And how absolutely adorable she is? I had this thought that the MC would get Tony's PTSD tinkering and well…Since she kind of had that big heart and mothering instinct, she'd not only need someone to take care of, but she felt bad for Dum-E. So, she made him a little sister! And I love it! So, we'll be going back to New York tomorrow, kids. We're going to see the full ripple effect. I hope you're prepared. See you next chapter! xx**


	25. Chapter 25

Wow…Things were worse than I thought. As soon as I walked into SHIELD Headquarters, it was nothing but a wave of agents beating on other agents like they were all sleepers activated at the same time. Fortunately for me, I had Tony on my hip to keep me out of all the fighting. They were all under Kilgrave's control…And it broke my heart.

These were people who fought together. People who stood together as one. People who had become their own family from all walks of life. And they were trying to kill each other. All because of one person's mistake (that I had warned him about, but now wasn't the time to point fingers) and another person taking advantage of it. This had to stop. And it had to stop now.

Clint had met us at the front door. As good as it was to see a familiar face, I was a little on the skeptical side. And Tony could tell. I jumped on the automatic defensive. I didn't want to kick the shit out of Clint because of Kilgrave, but if worse comes to worst, I'll have no other choice.

"Don't worry," Tony settled me, "Clint's good. He's on our side."

"I know he's on our side," I scoffed, "They're all on our side. They're all SHIELD agents, Tony. It's just whether or not Kilgrave's turned him."

"He took his hearing aids out," he explained.

"Smart move," I gave my favorite sharpshooter a high five. It was good to see Clint was still him. I rocked my left hand in my right palm and gave him a look, "Are you alright?"

He gave me a few quick nods.

"Good," I let out a heavy sigh of relief. One less thing I had to worry about. I shook my index finger and locked my thumbs and pinkies together, exposing my palms, "Where's Nat?

Clint's finger slashed through his palm and he rotated his fists upward, opening his palms at the end of the rotation. The first sign meant kill. The second meant grave. Put them together and you get the biggest asshole in the building. He looked so worried. I would be, too, if I were him. Natasha had come a long way from where she was. And no doubt, Kilgrave was going to make her backslide.

I wiggled a finger by my mouth and moved my thumb counter clockwise, "Who else?"

Clint gave me a three fingered salute; our sign for Steve. Then, he gave me his right hand on his left wrist, showing me his left arm. I was worried he'd give me that. It was our sign for Bucky…I had hoped he was out of here by now…

I shook my index finger again, shot my pinky out of my chin, and pointed, "Where is he?"

Clint covered his eye and cupped his hands together, only to pull them apart. They were in Fury's office.

" _Konechno on,_ " I groaned, " _Sukin syn._ "*

It was enough to make Clint smile and Tony confused, "What the hell was that?"

"He's deaf," I shot him a wink, "That doesn't mean he can't read lips."

"That wasn't even English," Tony pointed out.

"You're right," I commended him, "It was Russian."

"When did you learn to speak, and obviously curse, in Russian?" Tony wondered.

"Did you forget who trained me, Stark?" I smirked, "You don't think I picked up a few obscenities from Nat?"

"Like you becoming an expert on robotics from me?"

"Precisely."

"And I'm guessing you learned ASL from Clint?" he assumed.

"When I first started here," I confirmed, "You guys have more effect on my life than you think. Now, if you'll excuse me, gentlemen, I have a massive dick to take care of."

"Have fun," Tony adjusted my jacket and kissed my forehead, "Don't get into too much trouble. Make sure you call when you get there."

"Shut up, Tony," I giggled, rolling my eyes. I needed that.

Everyone else was too busy killing each other to even bother with me. I took the elevator up to the top of the tower and stood outside the door that was surprisingly unguarded. I guess Kilgrave didn't take me into consideration. Unless the guard was waiting for me elsewhere. I heard voices on the other side of the door.

"Heimdall, open the Bifrost." Thor? All of a sudden a bright flash of light illuminated Fury's office. He just went back to Asgard. I knew enough to know how that worked. But…No…

I threw the door open and saw the faint outline of who was standing in the beam. Thor wasn't alone. I figured it was time I made myself known, "Honey, I'm home."

"Look who's here!" Kilgrave cheered, sitting on Fury's desk with Fury at his feet like a dog, making my stomach turn, "Hello, darling! It's been so long. I missed you."

"Bite me," I growled.

"Don't threaten me with a good time," he winked. That sick, twisted, son of a bitch was enjoying this.

"Leave them alone," I demanded.

"Look at you!" he awed, "You do have the hero complex! That's adorable…I'm starting to think it's me. Do I bring out the hero in everyone?"

"Let them go, Kilgrave," I snarled.

"I'm not going to do that," Kilgrave sassed, "Now, see, I've come to kind of like you. You're beautiful, you're flexible, you're submissive. So, I can't kill you. Yet, I still want you dead. Do you see my predicament?"

"I guess that means I get to live another day," I shrugged.

"Or better yet!" he beamed, "Natasha, dear…?"

My God…Nat looked rough. She definitely went down swinging. That's for sure. Every part of me wanted to go over to her, take care of her black eye, and wipe the blood from her lips. She dropped to her knees at Kilgrave's side, "Yes, sir?"

"Be a lamb and kill her for me."

"Yes, sir."

Wait, what?

Natasha came at me with a strong right hook and her elbow in my nose. It had been a while since she and I sparred together, but she was quick and she was tactful. The pop to my jaw would put me in a state of sheer hell and possibly choke on my own spit. The elbow in my face would make me see spots, killing my vision for a while.

Luckily, I knew this place like the back of my hand. Nat may be quick, but I was fast on my feet. I brought her into the training room and she jumped onto my back, getting me down to the mat. This felt familiar. When I first started here and she was training me, Natasha pulled the same move. Does this mean…Is she trying to tell me she still has a little free will? Is she still in there?

"Come on, Nat," I dug deeper, trying to pull her out as she had her arm across my throat, "You're stronger than this. You and I go a lot farther back than Kilgrave."

I saw Natasha completely freeze up. That only happened when she had flashbacks of the Red Room. Her hesitation gave me plenty of time to get up and half ass pull myself together. I got her. She was back. That was my Natasha. Until she snapped out of her haze and dropkicked me in the chest, knocking the wind out of me.

Hold on. I just had to make her think I was dead and she'd leave. I could do that. If Natasha taught me anything, it was how to fake my death to save my life. I slowed my pulse to a near crawl, held my breath, and stopped my heart. She put her fingers to my neck and under my nose to see that I was "gone". Natasha left me on the mat and headed back upstairs. The pain was killing me, but I had to get back up.

"I knew you weren't dead," Bucky appeared from the shadows, "Surprised Natasha didn't pick that up."

"Bucky, no," I stopped him, "He's controlling you. You have to fight him."

"Or I can just kill you," he grabbed a hold of my wrist with his metal hand and snapped it. This wasn't Bucky. This was the Winter Soldier. I had to separate the two. The Winter Soldier was whatever HYDRA warped him to be. Or in this Despite the increasing pain in my wrist, I managed to get him in a headlock. I had to bring him down. And I had just the thing.

"They say before you start a war," I sang, "You better know what you're fighting for."

"What…?" Bucky started to settle down. I knew this poor little baby was going to be a lot of work when I started at SHIELD, so I planted a few mental triggers in his brain. One of them being a lullaby I used a lot in the beginning when his night terrors were the worst and I had to bring him down. I wasn't even sure if it would've been enough to get Kilgrave out of his head.

"Well, baby, you're all that I adore," I held my headlock against my chest, "If love is what you need, a soldier I will be…I'm an angel with a shotgun, fighting until the war's won. I don't care if Heaven won't take me back…I will throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe. Don't you know you're everything I have…?"

Bucky snapped out of Kilgrave's trance and broke down in my arms, "I almost killed you…"

"Shh…" I soothed, "It's ok, sweetie. It's ok. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

"I was going to," he wept, "I was going to take you out like you were any other target."

"Bucky," I cradled him, "Don't beat yourself up like this. You weren't you. You had someone else in your head. I'm ok. You're ok."

"What damage did I do…?"

"No," I stopped him, "Anything that happened wasn't your fault."

"Tell me."

"My wrist is broken," I told, "I think Natasha broke my nose."

"Yeah," Bucky nodded, "That's definitely broken. Your face is pretty splotchy."

"Rude," I teased, kissing his forehead, "We need to go stop him."

"How do we do that?" he asked, ready to redeem himself in any way he possibly could.

"As much as you're going to hate to hear this," I cringed, "I think we might need a little Winter Soldier. Clint can manage Nat. Tony can manage Steve. Fury's a drooling mess on the carpet."

"What about Kilgrave?"

"He's mine," I growled, "You're my back up, but ultimately, I want to be the one to kill him."

"Think you could use some more back up?" a familiar voice echoed through the training room.

"Jessica," I sighed, "Good to see you again. You, too, Luke."

"Hey, kid," Luke shot me a wink.

"Jesus Christ," she gasped, "What the hell happened to you?"

"A master assassin tried taking me out," I chuckled, "And Kilgrave sent another to clean up the mess. Think you could give us a hand?"

"Two superhumans can't hurt, right?" Jessica shrugged.

"What made you come back?" I wondered, "And with reinforcements."

"I had a feeling that mission Fury sent me on was bullshit anyway," she told, "Figured taking Luke with me wasn't a half bad idea. Granted, I'm strong and I can kick some ass, but so can he. And we'll need all the help we can get when it comes to Kilgrave. So, what's the game plan?"

"We take him out together?" I figured, "Bust in there, guns blazing? Kick ass, take names, chew bubblegum?"

"Do you have any bubblegum left?" Luke asked.

"Nope."

"Good enough for me," Bucky nuzzled into my shoulder.

"Let's do this."

 **A/N: Well, kids. Looks like the band is starting to get back together. With the addition of Luke, of course. And things are starting to turn around. I really need to stop with this whole cliffhanger business. That's just making me the dick here. But I'm really a sweetheart, I promise. Hell, I cried a little bit during the "Angel with a Shotgun" part. Because James Buchannan Barnes deserves all the love in the world and I think his night terrors were probably worse before she came along and attempts to fix him. Part two coming tomorrow. And I noticed something. The whole story could be coming to an end very shortly. Like in the next couple chapters. And I'll have an empty space in my week. You're more than welcome to give me some requests. I'm nothing if not a slave to my review section. I may or may not take on the challenge. I'll see you next chapter! xx**

 ***Russian Translation: "Of course, he is." "Son of a bitch."**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Last day, guys. And another thrilling conclusion!**

I walked back into fury's office with the biggest, smuggest, most pompous grin on my face. I couldn't have been more confident in this plan. Hopefully, the trip to the labs will pay off. I pushed the doors wide open, "Hey, Kevin…"

"Don't call me that," Kilgrave cringed.

"Why not, Kevin?" I egged him on even more. It felt kind of good to be the asshole for a change. And if calling him Kevin was enough to make Kilgrave squirm, so be it.

"I thought you were dead," Kilgrave assumed, "I even sent Barnes just to make sure."

"I saw that," I nodded, "Don't worry. I took care of him."

"You killed one of your friends?" he gasped, "Maybe you have more balls than I gave you credit for."

"Oh, no," I brought Bucky in. We learned from last time. I gave him a pair of headphones and some Postmodern Jukebox. He was set, "I broke your chains. I set him free, Kevin."

"I said stop," Kilgrave was getting pissed. And it was absolutely adorable!

"And I said no, Kevin," I grinned.

"You don't have Loki to take care of you," Kilgrave smirked, gauging my reaction, "That's right. In my digging through the SHIELD archives and talking to our pal Nick, I learned all about you. Dating a demigod? Not just a demigod, but the one that tore New York apart? You do have a thing for a bad boy, don't you? You don't want a lover. You want a project. You want to bring out the good in him! Give me a break. That's such bullshit. Your friends are my lapdogs and no one is here to save you."

"I am," Jessica and Luke joined us.

"Jessica!" Kilgrave sang, "Always horrible to see you."

"What do you want with SHIELD?" she cut to the chase.

"Isn't it obvious?" he scoffed, "If I control SHIELD, I control the world. I have their beloved Avengers at my feet. I have the world council to do what I wish. Easiest global takeover ever."

"Except one thing…" I stopped him, moving closer.

"What's that, darling?" he graciously accepted my advances, "Have you finally decided to join the winning team?"

I gave him that sweet little smile of mine that he adored so very much…and pulled the syringe out of my boot, jabbing it into the side of his neck. Another little trick Nat taught me, "Not hardly."

"Ooh…" Kilgrave twitched, "Tingly. What's in that?"

Before he could get another word out of his mouth, Kilgrave dropped to the floor. Luke gave him a good, long look over, "Is he dead?"

"No," I threw the needle aside, "Just unconscious with his healing factor stunted. Jess…"

"Yeah?" she awaited my order.

"We need to knock them all out," I winced, "Hey, Bucky? You can take your headphones off now, sweetie. It's ok now."

"Ok," he took the headphones off, "That wasn't bad."

"Did we miss anything?" Tony and Clint came in.

"Where the hell have you two been?" I scolded.

"Trying to keep everyone downstairs from killing each other," Tony defended, "Which we succeeded at, by the way."

"Awesome," I praised, "Now, you think you could help us out?"

"Sure," Clint agreed. Apparently he could hear me again, "What do you need?"

"Knock everyone out," I ordered, "Remember these are our friend. What they did wasn't their fault. It was Kilgrave's. Be nice."

"Dibs on Steve!" Tony called. Bucky shot him a very dirty glare, "I probably shouldn't have sounded so excited about that, should I...?"

"I'm sitting this out," Bucky insisted, "I'm getting too damn old for this."

"Go ahead, Bucky," I allowed, "Take a knee."

"Are we just going to leave them here once they're out?" Jessica asked, glancing them over, "They look like complete zombies."

"You think you and Luke could carry them up to the tower?"

"I'll take them," Luke volunteered, "You and Jessica can take care of Kilgrave."

"Thank you, Luke," I gave him a little nod.

Jessica threw Kilgrave's limp body over her shoulder like a ragdoll, "I'll meet you downstairs in max."

"Alright," I stood in front of Fury and gazed into his eye. It was almost creepy how I could tell they were still controlled. Their eyes were all glazed over, unblinking. A part of me would be apologetic for what I was about to do, but the other part of me?

Well…She was now an asshole. An asshole who wouldn't hesitate to drill her boss right in his face. As all the others fell like dominoes, I headed downstairs. I grabbed a few fun toys that Jessica and I could really have some fun with. I had used these on a few prisoners before. They'd be enough to make Kilgrave weep at my feet.

"How long is that sedative supposed to keep him out?" Jessica asked.

"He should be waking up any time now," I got down to his side, "Wake up, Kevvy…It's time to play a game."

"Don't…" he murmured, "Call me…That…"

"Well!" I chimed, "Good morning, sunshine!"

I jammed a very high voltage taser straight into his dick and pushed the button. It was fun to watch him writhe for a change. As soon as he came down from his jolt of pain, Kilgrave let out a high pitched whining. Music to my ears, "What the hell was that all about?"

"To keep you from ever reproducing," I threw the taser aside, "Jess, you care to get in on this?"

"It would be my pleasure," a dark, dirty grin made its way across Jessica's face. And the two of us proceeded to give him the most well deserved ass beating of Kilgrave's entire life. With every kick to his ribs, every punch to his face, every stomp on his knees and ankles, nothing had ever felt so satisfying. It was like watching someone do calligraphy or opening up a jar of peanut butter to find the top of it perfectly smooth or that perfect spiral on top of an ice cream cone. His screams sparked such a warmth inside of my soul that radiated throughout my limbs.

"Please…" he begged, blood gushing out of his nose and mouth, nearly dead, "I'm sorry…"

"Wait a minute," I stopped Jessica from delivering the final blow, "What did you just say?"

"I'm…Sorry…" Kilgrave sputtered out, tears in his eyes, "I'm so sorry…I realize that what I did was wrong…"

"No shit, Sherlock," Jessica rolled her eyes, "Took you that long to figure it out?"

"Jessica," I settled her.

"All I wanted," he coughed out, "was to feel loved…Just once…Is that too much to ask for?"

"Hey, Jess," I nudged, "I know he's an asshole, but Stockholm Syndrome's kind of starting to set in."

"Remember how you couldn't have sex with Loki for a while after you came back?" she pointed out, "And how you could hardly take a shower longer than five minutes? And how you had to leave for three weeks because you were having 'Nam flashbacks? And how he turned your friends against you?"

"Good point," I nodded, getting down to Kilgrave's face, "I understand. All you want is love. At least you can die with a clear conscience. But see…I've kind of grown to like you, Kevin. You're powerful, sexy, horrendously flawed. So, obviously, I can't kill you. Yet…I still want you dead. Do you see my predicament?"

"So, you're letting me live…?" he wept.

"I have a better idea," I smirked, "Jessica?"

"Yes?" she slinked to my side.

"Be a lamb and kill him for me."

"Yes, ma'am," Jessica pulled a gun out from her hip and put a bullet right between that son of a bitch's eyes, "Good night, sweet prince."

"Speaking of sweet prince," I wiped the blood off my face, "I need to get back to mine. Can you handle the clean up?"

"Yeah," she brushed me off, "Go ahead. Go get Loki back."

"I will," I left Jessica to play with the mess and headed upstairs. And for the first time in what felt like ages, it really felt like I was going home. Only one thing missing, but I was about to get that back anyway. I walked in the front door and saw Luke sitting on the arm of one of the couches, Clint with Natasha's head in his lap, and Tony at the island. Everyone else was sprawled out through the living room, "How are they doing?"

"They're all still breathing," Luke assured.

"Good," I sighed out.

"Kilgrave?" Clint asked, "What about him?"

"Dead," I promised, "Jessica put a bullet in his brain. I'm pretty sure he's not coming back from that."

"Super," Tony chimed, "What do we do now?"

Fury was the first to move. With Steve following not too far behind him, "What happened?"

I sat down next to him, cradling his face in my hand, "We won."

"Fantastic," he sighed out.

I shot a glare in Fury's direction, "I hate to say I told you so, boss, but…"

"Yeah, yeah," Fury put his tail between his legs, "I deserved that."

"You guys are all good now, right?" I hoped.

"Yeah," Steve rubbed his eyes, "I really don't remember much from it."

"Consider yourself lucky," Luke scoffed, "It's not pleasant."

"About time someone other than me takes that mind control bullet," Clint joked, pushing Natasha's hair out of her face.

"Hey, Director," I asked, "Any idea where Thor is?"

"Are you looking for me?" Thor came down the stairs, throwing his massive arms around me, "It's good to see you're alright, my lady."

"We're not done quite yet," I said, "I'll deal with the rest of you later. Thor, I need you to take me to Asgard."

"Asgard?" he gasped, "My Asgard? I don't know if-"

"Now, Thor," I put my foot down, my voice shaking a little, "Take me to Asgard."

"Heimdall," he called out, fully aware of what I wanted, "Open the Bifrost. I understand she's not of Asgard, but she is one of the mightiest warriors I've ever had the honor and privilege of fighting with."

"Thank you, Thor," I smiled.

Thor pulled me against his hip, "Hold on tight."

The bright light I saw in Fury's office shot down upon us and we were sucked up into space. I never thought I would ever see Asgard, yet here I was, a common Earth girl wrapped around the waist of their prince. I could have Thor if I wanted to. I knew that much. But I didn't. He and I came to terms with that long ago.

When we finally stopped, I couldn't even begin to describe what I was seeing. If this was just the entrance into Asgard, I may be in need of a clean pair of pants. A man stood in the middle of this golden bubble with his hands on what looked like a sword in the pedestal.

"So, this is the extraordinary human," he looked me over.

"Yes," Thor smiled at me, "This is Heimdall, the gatekeeper of Asgard."

"Pleasure."

"Thank you," I bowed slightly, unsure of the customs up here.

"You're welcome," Heimdall said, "I suggest something warmer, my lady. For one of your kind, it's probably quite cold here."

"Come, my lady," Thor took me through the gates, grabbing a hooded cloak for me on the way through. Holy shit, Heimdall was right. It was freezing up here! And I was used to sleeping with Loki. Once those doors opened, I stood completely floored. I had a literal rainbow beneath my feet and the stars surrounding me. This was absolutely breathtaking…

And when we got to the castle, it got even better. I had always been a sucker for good architecture, but this took the cake. Everything from the beams to the columns to the colors of the stone…It was all so overwhelming. I started to finally settle down once Thor and I got down to the dungeons in the palace. This must have been where they were keeping Loki.

I knew things were going to be bad, but I couldn't even fathom that they'd be this bad. Loki didn't even bother putting up the façade. My poor baby was absolutely miserable. And it was all my fault. Every fiber of my being wanted to go into his cell and hold him. But I kept quiet while Thor kept a hold of my hand to keep my shaking to a minimum, "Brother…"

"What do you want, Thor?" Loki sighed, "I'm not in the mood."

Thor opened Loki's cell for me and I sat with him in the middle of the room, "I come with a gift for you."

"What's this?" he asked, my hood still up and my face hidden. Loki turned away from me, "Please. Just leave me be. I want to be alone."

Delicately, I dropped my hood and snaked my arms around his frail frame, "Even if it were me…?"

Loki froze completely, "No…"

"Hey, baby…"

 **A/N: What a nice way to end the week. Kilgrave's dead. We've been reunited with Loki. WE'RE ON FREAKIN ASGARD! Everything appears to be doing pretty well. It seems we're coming down quite nicely. Now, the story's not over with yet. Almost, but not yet. But there is something ending right now…And that's bomb week. We're resuming to our regular posting schedule starting Monday. We'll be back to this being a regular Friday thing until the story comes to its natural end. Which may be in two weeks from now. And the final chapter is going to be a glorious thing. I'll see you next chapter, guys. xx**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Hi, guys! It's been so long since I've…Wait a minute…Didn't I see you guys all last week? It wasn't too strenuous for you, waiting a whole week for an update, was it? That comment was brought to you by sarcasm. I'm guessing you don't need a recap. I'm hoping so. If you do, your memory sucks and you need to see someone for that. Enjoy!**

I didn't care about the fact that Kilgrave was dead. I didn't care about the fact that SHIELD was back in its rightful hands. I had him. Loki looked me over very carefully, then glared a hole through his brother, "What kind of sick, dark magic are you using?"

"Loki," my heart shattered as I raised my hand to his cheek, "It's me. I promise. No magic. Thor brought me through the Bifrost."

"Then, why?" he turned away from me, "Why did you leave?"

"Thor," I asked, "Do you think you could give us a minute?"

"I'll be waiting outside," Thor obliged, leaving the two of us alone.

"I needed to clear my head," I confessed, pulling Loki down to the floor with me, "I couldn't do that with SHIELD up my ass."

"You could've told me," Loki growled under his breath, "You should've told me! Why didn't you?"

"You would've tried to stop me," I told, wrapping myself around his arm. I've never seen Loki so angry. Usually, it was me yelling at him. I couldn't handle him yelling at me.

"You do know Kilgrave was controlling Fury, right?" he glanced at me.

"I know," I nuzzled into his shoulder, "Come home, Loki. Please."

Loki brushed off my embrace and started to walk away from me, sitting on the other side of his cell, "I have no home. Not Asgard. Not Earth. I am but a hopeless orphan with nowhere to lay my head."

"You have me," I swallowed the lump in the back of my throat, following him closely behind, "You always have me. Look, Loki, I know I screwed up. I screwed up big. And I want to spend the rest of my life atoning for what I did."

"And how do you propose you'll do that?"

He's curious. I guess that's a good sign, "Will a promise that I'll never leave you again and showing you Kilgrave's dead, lifeless corpse do it?"

"You killed him?"

"Jessica did," I shrugged, "That was her kill. I helped. Tased his nuts a few times until they were sufficiently whole roasted."

"Nicely done," Loki praised.

I guess that was an even better sign. Hopefully, Loki was starting to come around, "So…? Will you come back with me?"

He let out a heavy sigh, "I don't know."

"Please?" I begged, "I don't want to go without you, Loki. I love you. I miss you. I need you."

"I'm still not convinced," Loki poked at me, "if you're really you and not some sort of a magical projection, what does the inscription on your engagement ring say?"

"Tale as old as time…" I sang, a smile on my face and a warmth in my chest, "True as it can be…Barely even friends. Then somebody bends unexpectedly."

"Just a little change," he joined in, pulling me to my feet, "Small to say the least. Both a little scared. Neither one prepared…"

I laid my head in Loki's chest, trying my damnedest to hold back any tears. But that wasn't happening, "I told you it was me."

"I believe the last line goes, 'Beauty and the beast', darling," Loki kissed the top of my head, "Let's go home."

"You're not mad anymore…?"

"I'll be holding this grudge until, how you say, the cows come home," he cradled me, "But damn, I'm glad to see you again. And in one piece."

"I'm sorry to scare you like that," my voice broke, "Never again. I swear to you, Loki. Never again."

"Come now, darling," Loki raised my face to his lips, "Let's go home."

"Ok." Going by the look in his eyes, I'm pretty sure I've been redeemed. As Loki and I stepped out of his cell, I took his brother by the hand, "Come on. We have to go."

"Are we going back to the tower?" Thor asked.

"Yes," I nodded as the three of us took off down the hall back toward the gate. Before we even left the castle, we were stopped by a man with gold over his eye. He looked more regal than either Thor or Loki.

"Thor," his voice thundered over us, "Why is Loki out of the dungeon?"

Thor dropped to one knee, "Forgive me, but I need to take Loki back to Midgard now."

"He doesn't need to be in a dungeon," I took Loki's hand, "He just needs me."

"And who are you?" the man wondered, looking me over.

"She's my fiancée," Loki introduced me.

"You're one of Thor's friends, aren't you?"

"Yes, sir," I confirmed, "Not quite an Avenger, but close."

Thor smiled down at me, "My lady, please allow me to introduce Odin, King of Asgard and our father."

"Your father," Loki mumbled to himself.

"Forgive me, your highness," I knelt to him, "I'm not used to being around royalty. Except for these two, of course."

"You're the astounding child of Midgard I've heard so much about," Odin took my hand, prying me away from Loki, "The exceptional warrior, yes?"

"I don't know about that," I played modest.

"It's true, Father," Thor gushed, "I would put twenty of our men against her and she would more than likely come out on top."

"Is that so?" Odin smirked at me, "Twenty Asgardian warriors against her? I'd like to see that. This child in an arena with our twenty best warriors."

"Father, no," Loki stopped, "She's been through enough in the past twelve hours. She doesn't need to go through any more."

Odin almost looked rather shocked. I wasn't sure if it was because of Loki actually calling him his father or how protective he was of me. Either way, I could tell this expression didn't come often, nor easily. Odin turned his attention back to me, "She's too sweet for you, Loki."

"I know," Loki pulled me back to his side, "I know I don't deserve her. No one will ever be good enough for someone like her."

"However," Odin went on, "I will give your union my approval. And my blessing. I wish you all the happiness and all the luck in the world."

"Thank you," Loki was taken aback. As was I. From all the horror stories Loki told me about Odin, I never expected something like that to come out of his mouth. Sweet? What does he mean, I'm too sweet? Clearly, he doesn't know me that well. I could be a bitch when I wanted to be. Loki looked down at me, kissing the top of my head, "Are you ready to go home, my love?"

"Yes, sir," I nuzzled into him, "It'd be my pleasure."

"Father," Thor asked, "Will you be needing me anytime soon?"

"Things are relatively calm," Odin reported, "I shall call upon you if I'm to need you. Until then, I'm sure Lady Sif and the Warriors Three will be able to keep a hold on things."

Thor, Loki, and Odin exchanged their goodbyes and the three of us headed back to the Bifrost and Heimdall beamed us back to the tower. Well…The roof anyway. The dark veil of night had fallen over Manhattan and I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful sky. Granted, the city below was lit up like a Christmas tree, but the sky…There was no beating it. The stars shined a little brighter than they normally did. I took a minute to just…take it in.

"Are you coming, darling?" Loki wondered.

"Yeah," I brushed him off, "I'll be there in a minute."

"Beautiful, isn't it?" he wrapped his arms around my waist and nuzzled his face into my neck.

"Very…"

"Do you know why the stars are always brighter when one of us comes back from Asgard…?"

"I don't," I spun into him, "Care to explain it to me?"

"It's residuals of the Bifrost," Loki told, "It gets scattered into the night sky and it creates this."

"It's beautiful," I got lost staring into the glittering void.

"Come on," he took my hand, "There's a chill in the air and I'm sure everyone else would like to see you, too."

"Yeah," I followed Loki back inside and down to the living room. Everyone was still scattered about the room just the way I left them. Natasha was still curled into a little ball in Clint's lap, only awake this time. Tony was behind the bar, pouring for everyone. Steve and Bucky were screwing around with each other like it was the old days. This was what I liked to see. This was my normal.

 **A/N: I'm so, so sorry this is up so late. Last night, I wasn't very up to par. The fact that I actually got it outlined last night is a bloody miracle. Blame it on the vodka. But alas. I managed. I persevered. And I love that this chapter ended on such a warm note. Now, I'm sorry to say this, but next week…will be the end of this. I'm sorry to say it, but all good things must come to an end. Next week's chapter, though…It's going to kick some serious ass. It'll be a warm, fuzzy chapter full of love and lols and wonder and WTF moments and it'll just be great. See you next chapter! xx**


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Warning. This almost didn't happen. I need to learn to not drink when I have to update the next day. So, if this chapter sucks, I apologize in advance. It shouldn't. I hope not anyway. Enjoy!**

I couldn't believe a whole year had gone by. It still felt like just yesterday I watched Kilgrave's lights go out. And I hadn't had a flashback since. Now, as I sit atop Avenger Tower in our living room, watching the snow fall on the already two feet on the ground, I felt like throwing up, but I still felt completely at peace. I couldn't sleep at all the night before. Then again, I couldn't sleep with Loki.

I spent the night in Bucky's room. I had to bring him down anyway. Heavy snowstorms aren't exactly a good thing for him. It's a sharp, painful reminder of the old days in Siberia and Russia. I wasn't sure if waking up next to another man the day of my wedding was a good sign. But Loki understood. Between Midgardian tradition and my job description, he understood.

Watching the snow fall over the city I loved gave me a sense of calm I so desperately needed. I was about to marry my own special snowflake that I loved more than anything in the entire world. His or mine. I really wanted to slip behind the bar and start pouring, but I was proud of myself. I wasn't going to touch it. Loki and I both agreed that I wouldn't be drinking today until the reception.

"Knock, knock," a familiar voice broke the still silence, "Hey."

"Hey, Nat," my voice shook.

"Whoa there," she sat next to me by the windows, "You ok?"

"I'm nervous," I chuckled, "Terrified. About to take a massive leap."

"You need a pep talk?" Natasha offered.

"Yes, please."

"You know you were meant for each other," she told, "Remember the day you two met?"

"I wanted to give him a tracheotomy with a sparkly swirly straw," I sighed nostalgically, "I couldn't stand him. He was just a giant pain in my ass that Fury pawned off on me."

"And look at you two now," Natasha went on, "You took down a big bad together. You fight together. You play together. You love each other at nauseam. You got him to come to terms with his past and him with you. When was the last time you had a Kilgrave flashback?"

"I haven't even thought about that asshole in six months," I admitted, "I guess you're right."

"You're not getting cold feet already, are you?" Coulson teased, joining us in the living room, "I know there's snow up to your waist outside and your husband's a frost giant, but…"

"Nice, Coulson," Natasha rolled her eyes, "Very nice. Keep making jokes like that and you'll be ready for fatherhood."

"Not for another six weeks," he pulled me up to my feet, "How you doing, kiddo?"

"I've been better," I surrendered to his embrace, "But I'm sure I'll manage."

"You sure?" he worried, "I can't have you passing out on me."

"I won't," I promised, "How's Mom doing?"

"I gave her a jar of Nutella and I'm pretty sure she has bacon in her purse," Coulson said, "She should be alright."

I gave him the weirdest look, "How does that even…"

"Don't ask," he reciprocated my sentiment.

I wished Mom and Coulson all the happiness in the world. If any two people deserved to find each other besides Loki and me, it's them. He would be the closest that I would get to having a dad ever again. I remember a couple months before the wedding in the SHIELD garage. I had just come back from getting my dress.

"Hey, Coulson," I found him under the hood as usual when he had a spare minute or two.

"Hey, kiddo," he crawled out from under Lola, "What's up?"

"I need to ask you a huge favor," my heart pounded hard in my chest.

"Sure," Coulson wiped the grease from his hands, "Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, it's fine," I settled him, still pretty shaky myself, "It's just…This isn't just a huge favor. It's monumental…With the wedding in a couple months…I was wondering…Will you…Since my dad can't do it…"

I could see a tear forming in my superior's eye. He knew exactly what I was about to ask him. And out of everyone I could've asked…Fury…Tony…Bruce…Steve…Clint…Hell, even Thor…I picked him, "You want me to give you away at your wedding, don't you?"

"If you wouldn't mind," my voice broke, "Will you?"

"Of course I will," Coulson hugged me tight.

In the moments leading up to the wedding, I had wished so hard that my dad was alive. I knew it wasn't going to happen, but I could've really used him right about now. Mom was too whacked out from her hormones that I didn't want to bother her with it. Fortunately, I had the next best thing I could have possibly ever asked for.

"You ready, kiddo?" Coulson nudged me, knocking me out of my weird haze.

"Yeah," I nodded, "Do I look ready? I feel kind of ready."

"I'd say so," he agreed, "By the way, if you don't mind me saying this, you did an excellent job mixing traditional Asgard with your wedding dress."

I turned a light shade of pink. Between Steve and Thor, I managed to design my wedding dress around traditional Asgardian robes that Loki was so hellbent on me having and a couple of dresses I had found in some magazines my mother was so kind to bring me. I was rather fond of the silver embroidery around the neckline. We hammered it out in a few days, "Thanks, Phil."

"Come on," he took my hand, "There's a finicky demigod waiting at the Met for you."

"Are you sure you're ok?" Natasha worried, pouring me a shot of Russian hospitality.

And I downed it. Sorry, Loki. What he doesn't know won't kill him, "I'm good. Let's go!"

"Now," Phil braced himself, "About the minister. Because it was kind of a last minute thing…"

"Don't worry about it," I brushed him off, "I know what was done. I'm just hoping he behaves himself…Just have to grin and bear it, I guess."

Before we knew it, we were standing outside the Metropolitan Museum of Art. I remember Loki and I going here six months ago on a random date night out and he said I belonged in here. So, naturally, I surprised him a couple weeks later saying I got it as our wedding venue. There wasn't anywhere better. I wasn't the only one that belonged in a museum.

The music started and I was trying to keep the everything bagel Jessica had brought me earlier in the morning in my stomach. Slow breaths. Slow breaths. Slow, even breaths. It's just any other day. Just a day of someone telling me something I already know. Loki and I love each other. We live together. It's going to stay that way for eternity.

Finally, when I got to the end of the aisle, Loki took my hands and the world stood still. Any apprehension, any doubt, any negativity I had melted away. I know I…we…were going to be ok. Everyone else there didn't matter. I had him. He had me. That's all we needed. The rest of the ceremony was going to go swimmingly.

"Dearly beloved," our minister began, "And obligatory family members that no one likes and are only here out of formality…"

"Wade!" I snapped at him.

"Sorry," he apologized, "Too forward?"

"A bit!"

"Anyway!" he went on, "We're here to take these two and make their ship sail. I've known these two for quite some time. Haven't heard from her in a few years after we had one HELL of a night together. I mean…Get a bottle of tequila in this one and she's like riding a mechanical bull turned up all the way!"

"WADE!" I dug the spike of my heel into his foot.

"But you don't care about us," he brushed me off, "You care about this wonderful couple in front of me. I couldn't put two people together much better than them. Except for maybe a couple in this very room that we all ship something fierce and had some GREAT romantic subtext in the first Avengers movie, but for whatever reason, Whedon made a little whoopsy-daisy in Age of Ultron and we're all a tad salty about it. Never mind that, though. Rings? Yeah? I'm assuming you two have them?"

"To you," Loki slid a gold band with the most brilliant of emeralds shining in my eyes, "To my partner. To my lover. To the best thing Midgard had to offer someone like me. I know I'm known for lies and tricks and mischief, but you…You're the only one I'd never want to intentionally hurt. I love you more than anything and I never want to do anything to risk losing you."

"Loki," I swallowed the lump in my throat, "Don't you dare do that to me. You should know better than that by now."

"Oooh! Looks like the honeymoon's over before they even say I do, folks…"

I should've known better. I should've gotten anyone else to marry Loki and me. What kind of drugs was I on to call Wade Wilson, of ALL PEOPLE? Did I have a momentary lapse? I must have. It took all I had to not drill him square in the face, but I had bigger things to worry about.

"There is no one better for me than you," I vowed, "There is no one I want more than you. Not Steve. Not Tony. Not Thor. Not Bruce. Not Clint. No one. The million times we've been over this should have sunk in by now. As long as you're not going anywhere, I'm not going anywhere either. And the next time you speak such blasphemes, I may be inclined to hit you. We've been through more than what we deserve, but we went through it together. And we came out on the other side together, bigger and better and stronger. I bring out the best in you. You bring out the best in me. I love you and nothing will ever change that."

"Now!" Wade chirped, "By the power vested in me by that drunken Google search that made me decide to get ordained in the first place, I now pronounce you cuddle wuddle buddies until you're dead. Loki, show your girl some love before I do."

"I'll sever your tongue one day, Wilson," Loki growled, just as fed up with him as I was.

"Sever your own down her throat!" he nudged, "Come on…Give us a little fan service."

"It'd be my pleasure," Loki's lips pressed hard against mine in the best angry kiss he's ever given me. One hand tangled in my hair, the other in the middle of my back, pinning me against him as the raucous applause continued around us. I couldn't believe it. I just married Loki…

 **A/N: Well, kids…I told you last week that this chapter would be our last…WELL! I LIED! This is going to be a two-part chapter. Where there's a wedding, there's got to be a reception, right? And I was thinking about this chapter last night in my loopy state and thought, golly, I'm about to end such a wonderful story. I want to do it on a happy, campy moment. How do I make it the happiest and the campiest I can make it? LET'S ADD DEADPOOL! And some of his glorious lack of a fourth wall. By the way, Joss Whedon, if you're reading this, I love you and you are a god to me. So, fortunately for you, I'll see you next chapter! xx**


	29. Chapter 29

"Look at my baby!" Mom waddled toward me.

"Look at you," I gasped, looking over my very pregnant mother, "You're glowing, Mom."

"You're so stunning," she hugged me tight, "I'm so glad you didn't let me see the dress now. What's the name on it? Once Phil and I get married, I might have to look them up."

"Let's see," I thought it over, "Rogers, Odinson, and now Laufeyson. It was a collaborative effort."

"I can't believe it," Mom started choking up, "My baby got married."

"Your baby is still in your belly," I pointed out, hoping to God she wouldn't start crying. Her hormones had been all over the place and I couldn't…

"You know what I mean," a lone tear escaped her eye.

"Phil…" I begged.

"On it," he knew exactly how to handle her. Mom hadn't been too terribly emotional until the last few months. The other day, she was hanging around the tower and she cried for an hour over a butter commercial, "Come on, Charlie. Let's go inside. Sound good? We'll sit down and get you some more bacon. Maybe there'll be a jar of Nutella waiting for you."

"Upper cabinet, left of the stove," I directed, "Went to Costco yesterday and got three jars."

"Bless you!" Mom squeaked, sprinting inside.

"Thank you," I mouthed to my possible future stepdad. I was so grateful for Phil Coulson. He knew how to handle my mother. She was exhausting to manage on my own.

"Well," my perfect husband joined me, "That went well."

"Better than I thought," I surrendered to Loki's embrace.

He kissed the top of my head, "Mrs. Laufeyson, could I have the honor of getting you a drink?"

"Yes, please," I could stab a man for a drink right now.

Unfortunately, it would come later before it came sooner. Loki left me by myself at the head table and I kicked my heels off. My feet were killing me. And, at Natasha's insistence, if need be, my shoes could double as a weapon! On the off chance someone less than pleasant decided to crash the reception.

"Hey! There's the girl of the hour!"

Speaking of some less than pleasant. But we mildly tolerated him because he was occasionally useful, "What, Wade?"

"I'm sorry I can't stick around," he apologized, "Manilow's playing across town. I got third row center tickets. But congrats on the wedding with you and the horny guy. And thanks for letting me make a gratuitous cameo and do a little fourth wall breaking."

"No problem."

"See you later," Wade kissed my cheek, "Bye, guys! See you next chapter!"

"Dammit, Deadpool!" some strange, outside voice yelled, "Don't steal my end bit! And don't talk to my audience! A little fourth wall breaking is fine, but this is overkill."

"Sorry, Lumi. Big fan, by the way!" he chirped. Who the hell was Lumi? I'm sure it's nothing. Just Wade's voices in his head. Or me going a little nuts, "Well, time to run. Come on, Stan! YEAH! MANILOW!"

"So, about that drink," Loki came back with a flute of champagne, "Will this do?"

"Good enough," I downed it, "I'm guessing Tony hid all his good stuff."

"Probably," he figured.

"I'm just surprised Fury let us have our reception in the tower," I fell into him.

"Tired, darling?"

"Exhausted" I chuckled, "I need something. I'm sure Clint has a stash of Red Bull in his room, but he'd kill me if I stole from his caffeine hoard. No matter how tired I am."

"Would you like me to get one for you?" Loki offered, "Or ask someone else to do it?"

"I'll be fine," I brushed him off, "Just need a second wind."

"You'll have to get one," he teased, "I have something special for us later tonight after everyone's left. After you've put all the children to bed."

"Mommy and Daddy are going to have some special alone time?" I assumed.

"It is our wedding night…"

"Speech!" Tony yelled, "Speech!"

"Thank you, Stark," Thor winced a little. Tony was already drunk. Beautiful. Something for me to take care of later, "Forgive me. I've never been very good with these kinds of things unless it was prior to battle. But to my brother, you have been blessed with the most glorious queen in all nine realms. And to my sister…Well, we can all agree Loki's a bit rough around the edges, but…A great king will rule his people. But his queen? His queen will conquer. And that's exactly the dynamic of these two and I wish them all the best."

As we all toasted, my brother-in-law sat next to me, "That was beautiful, Thor."

"Thank you, my lady," Thor came down, "I don't understand why I was so nervous."

"Excuse me," my mother's soft, sweet voice stood out from the low murmuring of the crowd, "I'd like to say something, too."

"Go ahead, Mom," I allowed as the room died down.

"About four years ago," she began, "I lost my husband in a burning building. In the same year, my daughter was on a fast track for medical school with high marks. She had scouts from Johns Hopkins offering her a residence upon her graduation. Her father couldn't have been more proud. However, a week after his funeral, she dropped out and spiraled."

"Mom," I noticed her hands shaking terribly.

"However," she went on, "This story doesn't have a sad ending. Just a sad beginning. Because after a month of her not speaking to anyone, a man came to her door. I was kind of surprised she didn't ask this man to be the one to walk her down the aisle. But he said he was there to talk to her about a special project. He knew about her father. And how well she did in school. And her sudden dropping out. The next day, she joined that special project. And a year later, an even more special project was dropped into her lap. I never would've thought that project would've ended up marrying her."

"Lo and behold," I giggled, cuddling into that special project.

"When I first heard about Loki," Mom continued, "I sided with her. I couldn't stand him either. But I could hear it in her voice. That loathing would turn into love. It was only a matter of time. And when I first met him, I thought this is the pain in the ass she has to deal with? He's so sweet and charming and he's got a bone structure to die for."

"Mother!" I growled while Loki took the compliments with a dirty smirk on his face.

"He grew on me," Mom smiled, her voice breaking, "And I know if my husband would've had the opportunity to meet him…He would've loved you, Loki. I promise you that."

"And I him," Loki took her hand, "Much like I've grown to love you, charlotte. You remind me of someone very special to me."

"Me?" I figured.

"Of course," he gave me a kiss, "My queen."

And the night progressed. The shenanigans ensued. Tony started drunk hitting on my mom. Phil threatened to use his taser. Clint somehow lost his pants. A regular night in the tower. I couldn't have been higher on cloud nine. I had Loki's last name. I had a gorgeous ring on my finger. I had everyone I loved in one room. I couldn't complain.

"Hey, doll," Bucky pulled me to his hip.

"Hi, sweetie," I smiled, "Is everything ok?"

"Well," he bit his bottom lip, "There's a woman trying to flirt with me. And I don't want to tell her off. She seems really sweet."

"Where?" I looked out over the crowd.

"In the corner," Bucky pointed, "Blue dress."

"Bucky," I laughed hysterically, "Come on. Let's go talk to her."

"Seriously?" he whined as I dragged him behind me.

"Hi, Grandma," I sat next to the woman Bucky showed me.

"Hi, sweetheart," she beamed, "Who's your friend?"

"This is Bucky," I introduced, "Bucky, this is my grandmother, Lily."

"Pleasure to meet you, Bucky," Grandma put her hand on his leg, "You know, you look exactly like this boy I went out with when I was much younger."

"Really?" Bucky cringed.

"Oh, yes," she sighed nostalgically, "I was living in Brooklyn. He lived a few blocks from me. We went out one night. And what a wonderful, magical night that was. We weren't exactly decent, if you know what I mean."

"We know, Grandma," I assured, trying to suppress that thought.

"But unfortunately," she went on, "He said he was signing up to fight in the war the next day and I never saw him again. One of the Howling Commandos, they called themselves. They fought with Captain America, you know!"

"You don't say," Bucky got really nervous.

"It's amazing how much you look like him," Grandma put her hand to Bucky's cheek, "You wouldn't happen to be related to James Barnes, would you?"

"Nope," he got up from his chair and made a beeline in the opposite direction.

"Is he alright?" she worried, "Was it something I said?"

"I'm sure he's fine," I shook my head, "I'll see you later, ok, Grandma? I'm going to make sure he's ok."

"Ok," she let me go, "Congratulations, baby."

"Thanks," I followed Bucky outside to the balcony and shut the door, "YOU HAD A ONE NIGHT STAND WITH MY GRANDMA?!"

"I didn't think I'd ever see her again!" Bucky defended, "I hadn't seen Lily since the forties! I wasn't lying to her. I really did sign up for the army the next day! And it wasn't long until we got shipped to Germany and I ended up falling off a train in Siberia. Only to wake up to being captured by the other side…"

"I can't believe it," I cradled my face in my hand, "I can't believe you slept with my grandma."

"Is everything ok?" Loki walked out, "I saw you two running out here and I got worried. What happened?"

"Bucky had a one night stand with my grandma back in the forties," I groaned, "If you could keep that among the three of us, that'd be fantastic."

"What happened?" Steve joined us.

"Remember that girl Lily I was with the night before I enlisted?" Bucky described, "Real cute? Dark hair? Big blue eyes?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "What about her?"

"My mother came from her vagina," I snapped.

"She's your grandma?" Steve looked over at me.

"Yep," I steamed.

"Hey," Natasha stuck her head out the door, "Am I missing out on a sewing circle?"

"Not at all," I shook off my slight rage, "What's up?"

"Clint and Tony are trying to have a rap battle," she bit her tongue, "It's pretty cringe worthy."

I shook my head and let out a heavy sigh. A mother's work is never done…

 **A/N: And here we have it, kids. The end of Kilgrave's Good Little Girl. I'm pretty satisfied with the monster it's become. Because it's my little monster. Now, as for a sequel…Would you guys be interested in a sequel? I'm not sure if I want to do one. I kind of have an idea for one, but I'm not sure if I want to go through with it. Give me a shout. Let me know if that's something I should do. Because I know exactly who the next big bad would be and the majority of the plot.**

 **And remember: Don't talk to strange guys in red suits with a pair of samurai swords on his back. He'll try and offer you candy, but he won't have any candy. There's never any candy…I'll see you guys…next chapter? I'll keep you posted if I ever post a sequel. Ok, bye. xx**


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